Path: newsfeed.direct.ca!news1.io.org!winternet.com!www.nntp.primenet.com!nntp.primenet.com!news-peer.gsl.net!news.gsl.net!portc01.blue.aol.com!newstf01.news.aol.com!newsbf02.news.aol.com!not-for-mail From: celeste801@aol.com (Celeste801) Newsgroups: alt.sex.stories Subject: Celestial Reviews 129 - Oct 26 Date: 27 Oct 1996 09:24:06 -0500 Organization: America Online, Inc. (1-800-827-6364) Lines: 467 Sender: root@newsbf02.news.aol.com Message-ID: <54vra6$8ep@newsbf02.news.aol.com> Reply-To: celeste801@aol.com (Celeste801) NNTP-Posting-Host: newsbf02.mail.aol.com Status: N Celestial Reviews 129 - Oct 26, 1996 Note: The story "First Love", which I praised so highly in my review, is available from The BackDrop Club. Order it in two parts as "1stlovga.zip" and "1stlovgb.zip". The BackDrop Club offers a service of helping people who are looking for a specific file, story, or a chapter or section of a story. If you are an adult and know the name of the file you wish to receive, send a request using the following format: TO: file.archives@backdrop.com SUBJECT: (the name of the file you wish as a single word) I HAVE used this service myself, and it is my opinion that it is NOT a rip-off. If you need more information, contact robin@backdrop.com. The BackDrop Club also has a Web Page at http://www.fantasies.com. Second Note: Because of the special Halloween issue, I have a temporary backlog of other stories. For that reason, I have had to delay a few of the stories that readers have sent me until CR 131, which will appear on November 2. Third Note: I am planning a special issue of stories related to Halloween for October 30. If you have titles to suggest, send them to me quickly. Obviously I cannot read a huge number of long stories; but I can repost old reviews and add a few new ones. Do NOT bother sending me the whole stories. If I don't have a story or cannot find it, I may ask for your further help in locating it. Here are the stories I have assembled so far for review in the next issue: * "Meeting Amanda" by Backrub (sex with a vampire) * "Intimate with the Vampire 2.0" by Rocket88 (vampire sex) * "The Warlock" by Rocket88 (witchcraft & whippings) * "Diana" by Mary Anne Mohanraj (mysterious outdoor sex) * "Wet Dreams" by Backrub (mind control & dreams) * "Tales of the Seeding" by Wollstonecraft (Primitive sex rituals) * "Porno TV: The Munsters" by Shelby Bush (sitcom parody) * "Bed and Breakfast" by RC (ghostly sex) "Princess" by Parker (TG activity at Halloween party) "Hot Sex Fantasy" by Mr. Double (costume party sex) "The Addams Family" "Eddie Comes to Visit" by Shelby Bush (sitcom parody) "Halloween" by RC (vampire sex) "Boo!" by PleaseCain (gruesome romantic tryst) "Brown Mountain Incident" by Charles Baudot (mysterious Mm encounter) "Temptation" by PleaseCain (poetic meditation) * Repost of a previous review (I am hoping that because the theme is related to Halloween the story will be reposted). - Celeste "Overheard" by Unknown Author (voyeurism & spouse watching) 10, 10, 10 "Hypnodontist" by RC (hypnosis) 10, 10, 9.5 "Ginsu Memories" by Dafney Dewitt (bizarre salesmanship) 10, 10, 10 "Dog Breath" by Dafney Dewitt (domination & submission) 10, 10, 10 "Something for Everybody" by R. Stephen Redick (confusing incest) 9, 9, 9 "January 96" by PleaseCain (warm-up for a cold day) 10, 10, 10 "La Puta" by Dr. Watson (wife watching & orgies) 9, 9, 9 "Busy" by Frederick Crawford (afternoon delight) 9, 8, 8 "Human Biology" by Unknown Author (sex with teacher) 9, 8, 7 "Bertram II" by {I'm not sure} (sexual humor) 10, 10, 10 * "Assignment" by Deirdre (ff sex, bondage, & anal sex) 10, 10, 10 * "Back" by Deirdre (anal sex) 10, 9, 9 * "Backfire" by Deirdre (anal sex) 10, 8, 7 * "Ball" by Deirdre (anal sex) 9.5, 10, 9.5 * "Bank" by Deirdre (mind control) 10, 10, 9.5 * "Basement" by Deirdre (whipping) 10, 8, 8 * "Beach" by Deirdre (nudity and romance in the dark) 10, 9, 8 * "Bet" by Deirdre (submission and slavery) 10, 8, 8 * "Big" by Deirdre (Breast fetish) 9, 6, 6 * = Repost of a previous review (because the story has recently been reposted). "Overheard" by Unknown Author (mcg-mcg@bartra.demon.co.uk). The man comes home early from work, and so his wife doesn't know that he is able to overhear her while she talks sex with here neighbor on the telephone. The two ladies talk about various sexual exploits, including how the man's wife will agree to come to the next orgy if the neighbor can manage to seduce the husband before that time. This is a very interesting approach to voyeurism and spouse watching. The story is posted by Merrill, Castle and Gray (UK). These people claim to have a list of 7000 stories, and it appears that they are willing to send them to people for free. I have not received stories directly from them; but I did recognize several good stories on their list. In the next few issues of Celestial Reviews I plan to review a few more of the stories they have recently posted on a.s.s. You can e-mail 'list-mcg@bartra.demon.co.uk' for an up-to-date list of their publications Ratings for "Overheard" Athena (technical quality): 10 Venus (plot & character): 10 Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 10 "Hypnodontist" by RC (74734.271@CompuServe.COM). This story wasn't at all what I had expected. That's because I had mistakenly copied the title as "Hypnopodiatrist". Once I got the dental angle right, I made a prediction that the story would be about a young woman who goes to a dentist for a checkup or tooth extraction and receives nitrous oxide (laughing gas) as a form of anesthesia. The patient will become hypnotized while under the influence of the gas and will become the dentist's sex slave. Actually, that's probably my own subliminal wish: I'll do anything to avoid dental pain! Well, I was close. The patient is a guy, and the dentist is a woman; and the sex occurs in the office. Other than that, my prediction was pretty much on target. It's a good hypnosis story. My problem is a practical one. My dentist used nitrous oxide on me last week. I remained fully conscious (I think); I just relaxed and didn't give a damn while the Nazi dentist did things to my mouth that used to make me anxious. Because I was so relaxed, pain simply did not occur. My dentist said nothing at all to me right after he turned the gas on. He simply left one nice lady with big tits and a nice smile in the room with me to make sure I didn't die or something while I was under the influence of the gas. He left the room - either to work on another patient or to boink the assistant with the smaller tits and cuter ass. When he came back into the room, he asked me if I "felt a buzz" yet; and when I nodded, he fixed my tooth. My dentist is quite handsome for a Nazi, and I do recall noticing in my highly relaxed state that he did not have an erection at that time. This is unusual for men in my presence; and this supports my suspicion that he and the second assistant had already taken care of his needs. When he was finished, he turned off the gas, smiled, and cryptically stated that he would "see me again in six months." As far as I know, there was no hypnosis or post-hypnotic suggestion - except that I do find myself coming to his office every six months or so. However, when I met my husband later that day in a semi-public place and he asked me how my teeth were, I replied, "Why don't you check?" and slipped him the tongue. Here's a technical question related to the story. If the patient did all this stuff under post-hypnotic suggestion and was told she would forget everything, how did she manage to remember these details and write the story in this first-person narrative? Kind of makes you wonder, doesn't it? Ratings for "Hypnodontist" Athena (technical quality): 10 Venus (plot & character): 10 Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 9.5 "Ginsu Memories" by Dafney Dewitt. This story by the author of "Bosnian Babes In Rapeland" borders on the grotesque - on the OTHER SIDE of the grotesque. It would be difficult for me to try to summarize it without ruining it for you. All I can tell you is that the woman is reading a romance novel about a woman in immediate danger of being raped by romantic pirates when she is interrupted by an unusual oriental knife salesman. 'Nuff said! Ratings for "Ginsu Memories" Athena (technical quality): 10 Venus (plot & character): 10 Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 10 "Dog Breath" by Dafney Dewitt. The author prefaces this story with the following disclaimer: "The intent of this story is to elicit disgust and poke fun at stories featuring humiliation and submission by using a soap opera type melodrama to help maintain the suspense. If you finish this story feeling just a little queasy, if you have a sudden desire to brush your teeth, then this story has accomplished its purpose." The author carries off this parody beautifully. The gist of the story is that the heroine hears voices that tell her that in order to obtain sexual fulfillment she must, among other things, jerk the dog off and swallow his cum. A serious cliffhanger moment arises when she has to kiss her husband - the stranger's urine on her sleeve is innocuous, but she is afraid that her husband will slip her the tongue and discover that she has dog breath. This may sound goofy; but parodies are SUPPOSED to sound goofy - it's the parallelism between the goofy and more serious events that gives a parody its punch. This is a very good parody. Let me preface these next few paragraphs by saying that I do NOT think that everyone who reads or writes bdsm stories or who practices a variation of bdsm is necessarily a loony or a danger to society. My problem is that I sometimes read stories that appear to me to be just as grotesque as this one; but they are not parodies - I'm supposed to take them seriously. For example, I may read a story in which a man inflicts pain on a woman in such a way that my common sense tells me that she is experiencing degradation very similar to that described in this story. As I read it, I say to myself, "This is weird. The author must be kidding." I look for a disclaimer, and there's no indication that the author is kidding; the writer really seems to believe that people can express love by giving and receiving degradation. My usual reaction is that such a story is not very realistic. Occasionally one of the authors will write to me after I post a review. The message will essentially tell me that I "have a problem" with bdsm. I have missed the point; the people in the story really love each other. {Or women really enjoy getting raped or being pissed on or whatever it is that I didn't understand.} These people usually assure me that they are sane and productive members of society, and I believe that assertion. My question is why do they assume that I am the one who has a problem? Note that if I knew the lady in this story in real life, I would assume that she was seriously dysfunctional. If she asked my advice, I would suggest she see a counselor. Unless I am missing something, she is not leading a "productive alternative lifestyle." She needs to get her act together. My problem is that the characters in some of the "serious" stories are just as dysfunctional, but readers are supposed to assume (without any further evidence) that their behavior is a realistic depiction of what normal people do. I may be arrogant, but it is my belief that the AUTHOR has the responsibility to express ideas in such a way as to communicate a story to his/her audience. The stories to which I give relatively low ratings for lack of realism (usually stories that involve bdsm, water sports, rape, or pedophile behavior) are usually written in such a way that INSIDERS will enjoy them. In other words, a person will enjoy the story if he or she already believes that it is productive to express love by torturing a partner or who thinks that kids who are molested by adults normally experience no ill effects. However, I review the stories as what I'll call a "mainstream" reader of erotica. If the authors want to include people like myself (and that's a lot of readers on this newsgroup) in their audiences, then it seems to me that it is THEIR responsibility to help the rest of us understand why the story is realistic rather than silly. In other words, the author of the present story shouldn't have had to tell me that this was satire. As I read the story, I should have been able to say, this is so silly that he must be kidding! Please note that I DO frequently give high ratings to bdsm, water-sports, rape, pedophile, etc. stories. This happens not only when they are parodies (as in this case) but also when the authors present the story in such a way that a non-insider like myself can see the point. I think the greatest short story ever written is "Telltale Heart" by Edgar Alan Poe. I don't think it is a good idea to kill an old man because I don't like his eye and then to bury him under the floorboards; but Poe wrote the story in such a way as to make me believe that a really strange person might in fact do the things that happen in that story. When I find stories that describe aspects of life that are unfamiliar to me, I appreciate them. Not only do I enjoy them - I also grow by reading them. My suggestion here is that authors whose stories are based on counterintuitive premises should assume the burden of communicating their stories realistically to the rest of us. That's part of being a good author. Ratings for "Dog Breath" Athena (technical quality): 10 Venus (plot & character): 10 Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 10 "Something for Everybody" by R. Stephen Redick (burrito@mc.net). Our story begins with the father too angry to masturbate while he watches a skin flick while waiting up to lecture his 17-year-old daughter because he found a box of condoms in her room. We have potential for irony in this opening. Anyway, the daughter is extremely late - like after 10:30 or even 11:00 p.m.; and the erotic dancer from the apartment next door comes home before she does. The dancer has brought home not one but two guys, and she does a threesome in front of the window that the guy likes more than the skin flick; and so he is surprised when his daughter comes home unexpectedly. He shoves his erect cock into his pants and confronts the daughter, who admits to having given five blowjobs that evening. I suppose this is because she's just a beginning cheerleader. {"I have a cold," said one cheerleader to the other. "And I have an orgasm whenever I sneeze." "What are you taking for it?" asked the other. "Snuff," replied the first. Ooops! wrong story! Something for everybody!} The five blowjobs are against House Rules, and so Dad spanks the daughter. Unfortunately, he already has a hard-on from the skin flicks or from the spectacle next door, and the daughter notices this, which makes her wet, which makes him harder. At this point, Traci notices the scene next door, which makes her wet, which makes him harder; and so she helps her father masturbate while they both watch the other people. While she daydreams about the five guys to whom she gave head that evening, Dad slides his cock into her soaking wet pussy. Soon we're witnessing a frenzy of fucking fluids flying freely all over everyone's faces. Meanwhile, the guy who is writing the story is getting a hard-on. He recalls how he had flexed his dick at an exotic dancer earlier that evening and how horny it had made her. A picture being worth a thousand words, he changes windows on his computer and quickly views the unclad pictorial representation of enough words to fill a short novel. The dancer would have been impressed with the jism that is soon dripping down his chest. She just might have liked the story, he thinks, as he turns off the lights and gets into the bed, alone. Not a bad story. But the question remains: Where was Traci's mother all this time? Ratings for "Something for Everybody" Athena (technical quality): 9 Venus (plot & character): 9 Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 9 "January 96" by PleaseCain (pleasecain@aol.com). The guy staggers in from a really miserable day. Life sucks. The weather is miserable. It took three hours just to get home from the airport. Life sucks. On the other hand, the furnace works, the fridge is stocked, he can't go to work for at least a few days, and his wife seems to be randy and determined to compensate for the unfortunate vicissitudes of life. This is a very short but very good story. Ratings for "January 96" Athena (technical quality): 10 Venus (plot & character): 10 Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 10 "La Puta" by Dr. Watson. Jan used to be gang-bang queen in college, and now she has a whore fantasy. Her husband's theory is that it's a mark of a good lover to help one's partner fulfill her fantasies; and so when his oil company sends him to the hinterlands of Central America, he invites her down to be his personal whore and to be shared with the roughnecks around the oil camp. Jan enjoys the role, and this story describes her exploits in detail. On the night before they leave town, Captain Ramone confronts the husband and tells him that he knew all along that Jan was his wife. He says that he is aware that decadent American imperialists sometimes enjoy watching other men fuck their wives. He suggests that when they get back to the States they see a good counselor. Actually, I made up part but not most of this paragraph. Jan tells her husband that when she's being gang-banged the experience is like standing aside watching herself. She says that's the Latin meaning of ecstasy - standing outside oneself. Actually, ecstasy comes from Greek, not Latin, roots with that meaning. Just goes to show you - never believe what a whore tells you in a moment of passion. Ratings for "La Puta" Athena (technical quality): 9 Venus (plot & character): 9 Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 9 "Busy" by Frederick Crawford. The woman is hard at work at her home office when the doorbell rings. Annoyed by the interruption to her busy day, she is pleasantly surprised to find that it is her lover, who promptly does wonderful things to her while he fucks her brains out. This is a nice, romantic story; but I would have liked to have seen some more development. In addition, I find the second-person (you) narrative to be distracting in most cases - and this story is not an exception. Ratings for "Busy" Athena (technical quality): 9 Venus (plot & character): 8 Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 8 "Human Biology" by Unknown Author. I got this story from the THC Archive. This story raises an interesting question: should teachers allow their students - male or female - to go to the bathroom during class for the sole purpose of jerking off because they have become so turned on by the sexual presence of the hot teacher? That's a tough question. I'll have to look it up. I have always assumed those kids were going to the bathroom to shoot up on drugs or something. The story is basically a teenage girl's fantasy. She longs for the body of the coach/biology teacher and eventually he pops her cherry and they have many happy times together. Ratings for "Human Biology" Athena (technical quality): 9 Venus (plot & character): 8 Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 7 "Bertram II" by {I'm not sure}. Bertie Wooster and Jeeves are characters in a series of books by the British humorist P.G. Wodehouse. Bertie is a member of the British ruling class who is totally jobless and lives a charming life. Jeeves is his valet, or a gentleman's gentleman, as Bertie refers to him. Bertie gets into trouble, usually involving women (mostly his aunts) and Jeeves saves him. That is the standard plot. The literati from the Motherland will already know this, but some Colonials would be clueless as a crown prince without this commentary. In addition, one of my correspondents has told me that UPI recently (Oct. 17) carried a story that two musicals based on the Jeeves stories are headed for Broadway soon. One is by Andrew Lloyd Webber ("By Jeeves") and the other is by the team that brought us Kismet and Grand Hotel ("Betting on Bertie"). Regular readers of these reviews may recall Bertram's earlier adventure with Aunt Agnes, in which he successfully utilized the one-man band technique on her pussy and asshole, followed by a vigorous double-holing with the assistance of the sainted Cheeves. In the present story Bertram is again summoned to his Aunt Agnes's house on the occasion of his cousin Wilhelmina's 21st birthday. "Cheeves!" exclaims Bertram, "this is a disaster! Whatever shall I give her?" What indeed! As usual, Cheeves is happy to be of service." Ratings for "Bertram II" Athena (technical quality): 10 Venus (plot & character): 10 Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 10 * "Assignment" by Deirdre. I guessed the plot of this one! I say that not to criticize Deirdre's creativity, but rather to brag about my own insight. If you're going to try to guess the plot, don't look at my description in the title list that precedes the reviews; that would give you an unfair advantage. The story begins when a woman spots a young woman who lives in the same apartment complex weeping in the hall. She takes her in, comforts her, and becomes attracted to her; and then the plot thickens. Ratings for "Assignment" Athena (technical quality): 10 Venus (plot & character): 10 Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 10 * "Back" by Deirdre. A woman tells her husband that she has been unfaithful to him a single time by having anal sex with an instructor at the spa. The man goes to confront the instructor. Since one of the great strengths of Deirdre's stories is the unusual twists in the plot, I can tell you no more. Ratings for "Back" Athena (technical quality): 10 Venus (plot & character): 9 Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 9 * "Backfire" by Deirdre. A college girl has been flaunting her cute little ass to impress a woman's husband. With the intention of embarrassing the girl, the woman persuades her to proposition her husband; but the girl turns the tables on the woman - giving double meaning to the story's title. Ratings for "Backfire" Athena (technical quality): 10 Venus (plot & character): 8 Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 6 * "Ball" by Deirdre. The woman's husband has lost a basketball game that he felt sure he would win. The woman is astonished to discover the winners buttfucking the losers. Drawn up in the heat of the moment, she herself has anal sex with Jerry, one of her husband's friends who happens to be nearby. Then the next morning Jerry's girlfriend shows up at the front door.... Deirdre certainly is a good writer. Many of her stories (like this one) start in the middle of the action, making the reader guess at what's going on. Subtle clues gradually enable the reader to figure the story out; but just when you think you have everything figured out, Deirdre throws in another surprise. This was an excellent story. Ratings for "Ball" Athena (technical quality): 9.5 Venus (plot & character): 10 Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 9.5 * "Bank" by Deirdre. My word processor tells me that this story was only 830 words long, but with those few words the author did a really nice job of creating a mood. What's best about the story is that Deirdre shows excellent restraint: she creates a mood and tells us this story without going overboard and trying to make more of the incident than there really was to it. Other writers would be tempted to work in some four-letter words and at least a couple of orgasms and to follow the formula for a good sex story; but Deirdre just relates this anecdote in a way that made me think of comparable things that had happened to me during my own early adolescence. Ratings for "Bank" Athena (technical quality): 10 Venus (plot & character): 10 Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 9.5