Message-ID: <7659eli$9801221708@qz.little-neck.ny.us> X-Archived-At: From: Lady Cyrrh Subject: The Annex Reviews, 1/21/98 Newsgroups: alt.sex.stories.d,alt.sex.stories.moderated,alt.sex.stories Followup-To: alt.sex.stories.d Content-transfer-encoding: 7bit Content-type: text/plain; charset=US-ASCII Path: qz!not-for-mail Organization: The Committee To Thwart Spam Approved: X-Moderator-Contact: Eli the Bearded X-Story-Submission: X-Original-Message-ID: X-Is-Review: yes Random notes: First, those authors who send me stories to review, please include the newsgroups they were posted to and the dates. This makes it more convenient for readers to find the story. Yes, I do get questions about this. As one of the purposes of these postings is to inform readers of the stories and/or authors they would be interested in, this only makes sense. The *main* purpose behind these postings is to amuse myself, but that's another story. Re the recent thread on ASSD about sex stories reflecting reality, and the responsibility of the author to "be honest": Stories are fiction, and fiction is, by is nature, an entertaining lie. Just because these are stories about sex and often masquerade as memoirs or personal histories doesn't make them more "honest" than any other sort of fiction. Neither should authors feel they should write only about what they have done or what they planned to do. (If Shakespeare had followed this rule, there'd be no MacBeth.) Many writers use ASS to air their personal experiences; some write stories as a sort of therapy or forum for understanding their own sexuality; and some do it just for the sheer challenge or as a way to exercise their creative juices. All of these reasons are perfectly valid ones, and none less "honest" than the other. At least on a Wednesday. The stories: Karla in a Heap of Shit, by Karen (F/F, D/S, scat) Buddy Long in Makin' Some Friends, by Buck N. (M/F celebrity, humor) Wife's Training, by Tezezzar (M/F BDSM) Violet, by Thundershark (F/F, M/F, BDSM) Mrs. Michaels, by Grimace (M/F teen) Karla in a Heap of Shit [A-/B+] When posted: 1/16/98 Where posted: ASS Author: Karen Poster: Lunasea Address: lunasea99@hotmail.com Scat stories are one of the most extreme forms of sexual fantasies. Basically they involve torturing others with their own shit, including forcing them to eat it. (I've squicked you out now, haven't I?) It's fairly safe to say most people are repulsed by them, but scat has its fans. No less a luminary than Robert Mapplethorpe was a scat fanatic. I decided to review this story both to experience a different kind of sexuality and because Celeste wouldn't touch it unless she was wearing an airtight hazardous waste disposal suit. You'll also notice I gave it an A-/B+, a grade at the high end of average. The plot was this: Karla is a beautiful young lesbian attracted to both dominance and scat games. A former lover blackmails her into becoming the toy of a group of wealthy, perverted women who play them, and they shit all over her. In a later part, she ingests her own wastes through a tube. I wasn't turned on by this story; I was sort of shocked. Nevertheless, the acts were vividly described, along with the emotions of the woman forced to participate in them. If someone *was* interested in these acts, they would be very pleased by this story, because it fit the fantasy to a T. The writing was good, and the D/S elements were handled well. The plot wasn't one bit plausible, but then, it wasn't meant to be. Buddy Long in "Makin' Some Friends" [A] When posted: 1/16/98 Where posted: ASS Author: Buck N. Address: buckn@hotmail.com In this story, the first of a new humor series about celebrity sex, middle-aged, beer-bellied male escort Buddy Long has sex with Jennifer Aniston. Like last summer's Austin Powers movie, the humor comes from a total nebbish being seen as sexually desirable, and it's a lot of fun. Women fall over themselves because of his 12-inch dick and skilled tongue, in spite of the fact he wears a short-sleeved, poly-cotton blend plaid shirt and a neon-purple glow-in-the-dark thong over his hairy beer belly...not only that, he's a bargain, because he charges only $50 a session. This was a very fun story, written well, that doesn't take itself too seriously. I could take or leave the celebrities, as I wouldn't know who Jennifer Aniston was even if she lined the bottom of my cockatiel cage, but Buddy Long is definitely a swingin' guy. Wife's Training [A+] When posted: 1/16/98 Where posted: ASS, ASSM Author: Tezzezar Address: tezzezar@aol.com This story was excellent combination of the wifeslut and BDSM genres, spiced with a little bit of John Norman's Gor (12/7/97 Reviews.) A guy has sent his wife through slave training and plans to enjoy a quiet evening at home watching a videotape made of her schooling. His wife goes into extreme sexual agitation at his plans; to settle her down, he permits her to suck his cock, and these real-life scenes alternate with the training scenes on the tape, a nice way of doubling the fantasy, presenting it in both past and present form. A very hot story. Violet [C] When posted: 1/16/98 Where posted: ASS, ASSM Author: Thundershark Address: thndrshark@aol.com Compared to the one above, this story was pretty dumb. An 18- year-old bombshell inveigles herself into an innocent family by being adopted, then schemes to marry Dad and get his money. But first she has to get rid of his own teenage daughter. Instead of going for something easy like tripping her so falls down the stairs, she equips the basement of the house in the latest dungeon dressings and lures poor Jenny down there. Piercings, chainings, whippings, and fetishwear parades result. Though the dungeon scenes were OK, the idiotic, unrealistic, poorly conceived plot dragged the grade down. I mean, if you're going to write BDSM and can't think up a decent storyline for it, what's wrong with just presenting the act and sparing the reader the so-called "plot?" Especially when it was poorly done as this was. Mrs. Michaels [C+] When posted: 1/12/98 Author: Grimace Address: Grimace1@erols.com. A young man is forced to move back home and spies on his divorced neighbor. She was also the mother of his best friend in high school. He's long had a yen for her, and on the pretext of helping her out with some chores, they do it, with some slightly Oedipal complications. Things came to an abrupt ending when Mom drives off and her roomate comes home, with the guy spying on her through the window but doing little else. Did I miss something? The idea of this wasn't bad--it worked for Dustin Hoffman in "The Graduate"--but the writing could have used work, especially the dialogue: "I think I might have some things that have been neglected since my husband left. Would you like a drink Dennis Come into the kitchen and we can talk about what I would like you to do for me." A more natural style would have helped. As it's the author first story, I'm not going to drub too badly as regards grammar and style, except to say that short paragraphs are better than long and when characters are speaking dialogue, each person gets their own paragraph. Keep working at it, finesse will come. Comments to: ladycyrrh@aol.com Website---> http://members.aol.com/ladycyrrh -- +--------------' Story submission `-+-' Moderator contact `------------+ | story-submit@qz.little-neck.ny.us | story-admin@qz.little-neck.ny.us | | Archive site +--------------------+------------------+ Newsgroup FAQ |