Message-ID: <7121eli$9801091652@qz.little-neck.ny.us> X-Archived-At: From: Celeste801 Subject: Celeste's Top 100 Stories Reviews (A-D) Newsgroups: alt.sex.stories.d,alt.sex.stories.moderated,alt.sex.stories Followup-To: alt.sex.stories.d Content-transfer-encoding: 7bit Content-type: text/plain; charset=US-ASCII Path: qz!not-for-mail Organization: The Committee To Thwart Spam Approved: X-Moderator-Contact: Eli the Bearded X-Story-Submission: X-Original-Message-ID: <55e4010d.34b62f46@aol.com> X-Is-Review: yes Celeste's Top 100 Stories of 1997 Original Reviews in Alphabetical Order (A-D) Note: The listing in rank order is posted separately, under the label " Celeste's Top Stories -1997." Second note: These are the original reviews. They have not been revised except to correct obvious errors. In many cases, information from the original context that is missing here may make a review confusing. I guess you'll just have to live with that. Third note: Stories that received "honorable mention" are not reviewed here. Fourth note: Congratulations to all whose stories are reviewed here. I am confident that people selecting stories from this list will find good stories, many of which are better than those published in professional sources. "The Absolutely Astounding Adventures of Angelica Ahsmacker" by Tom Bombadil (mrdouble@ix.netcom.com). This is a sexually explicit version of a cliffhanger - one of those media productions that used to exist as television serials and which one can still find on the cartoon channel on cable TV. This episode begins with Angelica Ahsmacker and her faithful sidekick, Tiny Silvertongue, hanging over a cliff. Not really, of course. Angelica is actually tied to a log and about to be bisected laterally by a buzz saw. As the author puts it: "It was a race between the awful arms of that molestation machine and the terrible teeth of that spinning saw to see which would be the first to delve deep into the defenseless damsel's dampening divinity." I enjoy this sort of thing immensely. This author is creative in both his plot development and in his use of language. {I enjoy cunning linguists.} If you like humor and alliteration with your sex, you'll enjoy this story. "Adrenaline Games" is a very well-written, tightly-knit tale by DG that touches on the aphrodisiacal powers of risk and fear. DG gives his e-mail address as dionysian@hotmail.com which gave me pause for a moment, for one of the definitions of dionysian includes irrational, frenzied or undisciplined. But it also touches on the orgiastic and ecstatic. As it turns out, none of those apply so much as Nietzsche's philosophy of creative-intuitive power. That intellectual rumination aside, the story's hot, fast paced and just a little bit tense as, of course, it's intended to be. Andrew Miller is a 21-year-old college student who's just been arrested for the rape of Sarah Glassman. When questioned by the detectives, he maintains that it was all a game, that Sarah *wanted* to be raped for the thrill of it. The detectives are initially unmoved but when Andrew offers to tell the whole story, they're willing, even eager to listen. The story flash backs are very well done, capturing the mercurial antics of unpredictable Sarah, "a weird chick." Initially she goads Andrew into tying her up but she wasn't prepared for his creativeness. He surprises and thrills her with his spontaneous topping. She clearly gets off on edge work. Hunter Thompson might well have used her in his book, "Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas." They get hooked on their own adrenaline-producing scares. I've done just enough of my own edge work to have an appreciation for fear-generated juice. But did something go wrong? Did Sarah go round the bend on the last one? Is Andrew going to take a fall because of this "weird chick?" By all means, read the story and try to imagine yourself in it. It'll get your juices going. "All we like Sheep" by MC Woodsmoke. My initial reaction to this story was perplexity at its title. What in the world does it mean? I concluded that it was probably a typographical error. The author either meant to say "We Are All Like Sheep" - or maybe it was the more bestial "We All Like Sheep." Actually, the title is stated exactly as the author intended it. You'll have to read the story to find out what it means. Hint: It's part of a phrase that you'll probably recognize. Anyway, the hero of this story is that ubiquitous denizen of a.s.s.: the electronics genius who knows how to use technology for mind control. This particular hero has been smitten by the lovely lady at work who has no time for sex; she just reads her bible and performs church work with her youth group. A few weeks with our hero's magic mind control tape takes care of that. She becomes a hot little sex kitten that does her creator proud - her new creator, not the old one, who may have preferred her to keep up the work with the youth group. Omigod! The youth group! Angie was listening to the subliminal tape while she was working with two of the girls from the youth group; that means the kids might have heard it too! He had planned to seduce Angie, but suddenly Stacy and Kayla seemed primed and ready to go. {I'm not sure exactly how state and federal law deal with the accidental exposure of minors to subliminal seduction. I guess it would depend on whether one could get the judge and jury to listen to the tape.} An odd thing about mind control is that it has the capacity within a few sessions to make people more enthusiastic devotees of an activity than they would be had they participated in that activity happily for several years. For example, I myself have enjoyed cock sucking for over 20 years. In a sense, my mind has been programmed to enjoy it, much like Angie in this story. Yet when I am participating in that activity I retain control over my brain and can do creative things (like chew gum, think, and even stop if the performance contradicts an important value system) while still maintaining my enthusiasm for the activity. This is a long way of saying that sometimes mind control stories become a bit simplistic. Nevertheless, aside from some grammatical flaws, the present story is highly creative and well worth reading. "And Then I Fucked Her" by Mike Hunt (MrM1ke@aol.com). Fucking Mike Hunt! I was reading this story, and Mike was quoting Michael K. Smith's essay on "How To Write Sex Stories Good," which is one of my favorite essays on that topic. Then I realized that he was poking fun at Michael K.! Well, OK; humor I can understand. So as I read on, I said to myself: "This is a really great story! Look at all these long quotations and how well Mike Hunt has handled the quotation marks!" This was especially gratifying, since in one of my recent issues of CR (the one before I discussed blonds and blondes) I had discussed quotation marks. But then he left off an end quote! I was getting all hot and horny, and now I didn't know who the hell was talking. To top it off, he spelled the same person both "blond" and "blonde." It was like taking a really cold shower during an orgasm. What next? Will he "lay down next to the blond on the bed? {Wow! The subtle irony in that last sentence overwhelms me. Maybe I had better explain it....} The bad news is that this isn't really much of a story at all. The good news is that Mike Hunt tells a good story even when he's not telling a story. And fortunately, this non-story is really sexy. It's mostly about sex in a movie theater and at a butcher's shop. Well, the actual story is about sex in and around a dentist's office; but the real action takes place between the lines - actually, above and below the lines. I've given Mike Hunt a lot of thought, and I imagine you have too. {Some sentences in this review don't have their full impact unless they are read out loud, or at least loudly to one's internal audience.} In fact, I have been suspicious about Mike Hunt's identity. I had a theory that Mark Aster was in some way connected with Mike Hunt, because I had never seen the two of them in one place at the same time. However, just today I found newly posted stories by both authors, and I doubt that Mike Hunt is clever enough to use a deliberate subterfuge to throw me off track. I used to think that I could spot Mike Hunt's stories by their style alone. For example, the present story uses the word "baloney" two times: once immediately preceding "pony" and once during a conversation with a blond(e) whom he hoped to fuck in a butcher shop. {That sentence becomes less ambiguous if we put "in a butcher shop" right after "conversation," but I think Mike Hunt would prefer it this way.} Anyway, that's the way Mike Hunt would use baloney. So I know this is Mike Hunt's work. The problem is that Mike Hunt has imitators. For example, Taria recently published "Soft Ball," which was a story about rather than by Mike Hunt, and yet it sounded like something that had really sprung forth from Mike Hunt. The word "sophomoric" has been overused with regard to Mike Hunt's writing; but my online thesaurus suggests no alternatives - just a misspelling for "soporific," and Mike Hunt is certainly not soporific. So we'll go with raunchy, sexy, titillating, humorous, and generally arousing. But he uses the word "tits" only six times. Not good enough! As the Sex Nazi said on Seinfeld, "No sex for you!" "Angela" by Friar Dave (friar_dave@mhbbs.com). Friar Dave is a little hard to figure out. Some of his stories show us that pushing kids into early sex can be really bad for them. Other stories, like this one, demonstrate that a young girl can have a great time with no ill effects by making it with an older man. This is a really hot, sexy story. Now I'm going to discuss the legal, ethical, and personal issues. I'll try to be interesting, but if you don't want to read that part, skip to the ratings, which say that this is an excellent story. Would I like to have had Angela's experience when I was 12 years old? Actually, no; but I was a different type of kid. But would I like to have been like Angela and then have had this experience. Yes, I have to admit it sounds really neat: my first sexual with an experienced guy who cared about me and thrilled me to consecutive orgasms while he teaches me how to make tender love to him - what's there not to like? Would I like my daughters to have Angela's experience? Again, in the context described in the previous paragraph - why would I want to keep them from this kind of pleasure and growth experience? The problem is that real life does not match fantasy. In the movies there are car chases in which cars routinely zoom down crowded sidewalks and nobody gets hurt. Those are exciting car chases and interesting fantasies; but in real life police departments have rules about "hot pursuit," because they know that innocent people would be killed or injured if they did what the cops do in the movies. It's the same with sexual stories; we need to differentiate between fantasy and real life. Lots of kids who start having sex when they are twelve find that they can't stop it once they have started and wind up with seriously dysfunctional lifestyles. I've discussed this in my review of "Marie," and I won't repeat that discussion here. So my advice to my daughters is to stay away from dirty old men and not to seduce the nice men they meet. On the other hand, they can fantasize all they want. Likewise, had I not been religiously repressed, I wish I would have had fantasies like this back when I was twelve. What's a guy supposed to do if a nice, cute kid comes into his house and innocently wiggles her ass in front of his nose? He should be friendly and persuasive and do whatever it takes to decline the opportunity. Really. He should consider the possibility of either discussing the matter with the child's parents or encouraging her to see a counselor. Really. He should in the future avoid placing himself in compromising positions. Then he should go off by himself and either jerk off, visit his adult lover, or take a cold shower - or maybe write a hot story for this newsgroup. Really. {Parenthetically, even though I enjoyed this story and gave it high ratings, I would probably prosecute an adult who would conduct himself this way with my underage daughter. It wouldn't be an automatic reaction. I'd look at the facts of the actual situation, but I agree with the notion that 12-year-olds who say they want to have sex with an adult are usually not responsible for their actions, whereas the adult is.} "April's First" by Uther Pendragon (anon584c@nyx.net). I originally had trouble finding Part 2 to this story; and I eventually went ahead and posted my review of parts 1 and 3. I concluded that there was no Part 2; it was an April Fool's joke. Get it? The title is April's First, and the story was posted on April 1, so.... Anyway, the real action takes place in Part 2, which didn't exist when I posted my original review. The author invited others to submit their versions of Part 2. The only author I know of who accepted this invitation was Plainman, whose "Excluded Middle" did a superb job of integrating Plainman's own style and his Princess story line into the framework set up by Pendragon. Now Pendragon has posted his version of the missing Part 2, and the result is another really good story. The story actually describes two very interesting and healthy relationships in the life of a 16-year-old girl: her romantic relationship with her boyfriend and her sibling relationship with her older sister. Both relationships are well developed, and both help make this a sexy story. One of the best things about this story is its attention to minor details. For example, when April agrees to make love to Brian for the first time, he returns to his room that night and fantasizes about the big event. Suddenly he realizes that his room is a mess and that he doesn't want April to see it that way, and so he straightens it up. The author attends to details like this in such a way that they contribute to instead of detracting from the overall focus on the first-time experience between the two young lovers. The story does contain some awkward grammatical structures; but this author always revises, and I have a feeling they'll be gone in future postings of this story. For example, April "...wanted this waiting to end -- if even in pain." Those last four words are awkward; and several instances like this really do disrupt the reader's train of thought. Fewer readers will be distracted (as I was) when Brian's cock peeked discretely at April, but the distinction between discreet and discrete is worth preserving. The story is so good that I (like most other readers) was willing to ignore these minor flaws, but why not write a perfect story? Here's a further note with regard to style. Brian "could tell that she was nervous and that her acceptance was more mental than physical." Is that REALLY what the author meant to say? It seems to me that April's hesitation is largely mental, which is the opposite of what the sentence says. I KNOW what the author means (I think), but when I look closely, the story sometimes doesn't help me as much as it should. My students have learned that it's often a good sign when I give them a paper back with red ink all over it. When they look closely, they discover that the comments are not really about mistakes - they are suggestions for making the paper perfect. The students often make the corrections and submit the paper and win a state competition or something like that. Applied to this story, this means that although this story won't get straight 10's right now, by the time I make my selections for the Top Stories of 1997, this is likely to be in the Top 10. The only problem with the story is that in this middle part the author has focused so heavily on getting the emotions and details right that he has let the language stand just slightly in the way of expressing this excellent story as accurately and convincingly as possible. If you've read none of the April stories, I suggest that you start by reading the entire current (or the eventually revised) version of Pendragon's "April's First" - all three parts. Then mentally obliterate Pendragon's Part 2 from your mind and read Plainman's version. Remember: details will diverge, because Plainman did not see Pendragon's Part 2 before he wrote his version, and the authors take completely different perspectives. "As the Paige Turns" by Hawk Richards (heminway@epix.net) Guest review by Mike Hunt. A week ago I wrote a review of Hawk Richards' "As the Paige Turns." And I slammed it pretty good. I even noted that Celeste had given him low marks on an earlier story and he had revised it and gotten all 10's on the revision. That showed me that he cares about his work, and I urged him to revise "Paige." The sonofabitch went and did it. And he did it again. It's a great story now, certainly worth 10's, and I highly recommend it. The story still revolves around a lady psychiatrist who helps a client through his modem fetish and along the line discloses her own fascination with the stories in the newsgroups. And while there's no graphic on- screen copulating or masturbating or blowulating, it's still sexy; it's still a quick read, and it's now quite worth your while. The typos are gone, the logic is logical, the story is fun! One reviewer's disclosure: he mentions me in the story. That's a nice stroke, but I wouldn't change my opinion just for that. Another disclosure: he's stealing my fucking format, and has added closing remarks that dropped me to the floor with laughter. Any author who can write a sexy story AND make you laugh at the same time is, uh, probably a mope. Take it from me. But a funny mope, and maybe one who shows a helluva lot of promise. Read "As the Paige Turns (Revised)". It's a goodie. "The Beaver Meets Mr. Ed" by Unknown Author (Red Dragon Repost). The gist of this story can be summarized in the following cryptic conversation: "Wh-, What are we gonna do, Wally?" Wally stared thoughtfully at the corpse. "Aw, Beave, I don't know", he said timidly, "I mean we can't just go and tell Mrs. Mondello that her son got raped to death by a rabid horse at the circus!" This story reads just like a sexually-enhanced episode of "Leave It to Beaver." Of course, it's not very realistic, because that show didn't have a talking horse, nor did the fathers of Mayfield usually punish their children by sodomizing them. Such considerations aside, this is a really funny story. It even includes this gem near the end: "You look fine, Beave, but just don't breathe on Mom. You've got horse cum on your breath." "Bees" by Mat Twassel (mmtwassel@aol.com). This was the 33rd story I read for this contest; it was the first one that made me lean back in my chair and laugh out loud. But it's not just funny; it's also very sexy - even though no sex actually occurs during the story - at least not on stage. This story uses a wonderful combination of innocence and innuendo to answer the common question, what can possibly go wrong (or right) if a wife puts her panties into her husband's lunch bag instead of a napkin and the husband goes out for lunch with someone else and passes the lunch bag unopened along to the sexy receptionist? The answer has something to do with one's belly button and about 500 bees. "Birthday Present" by OddManOut Anywhere (oddman0ut@hotmail.com). Jeff is a bit upset, because his girlfriend Monica has gone on an anthropological field trip instead of being with him on his birthday. To reduce his own misery, Jeff has decided to spend the evening of his birthday on an anthropological field trip of sorts - that is, he goes to a frat party, where a voluptuous blonde who is a student of animal husbandry or something hands him a note that says: "Happy Birthday! I'm very sorry I wasn't able to be with you today. However, I am giving you a present so that you won't miss me too much this week. Your present is named Judy, and she is a good friend of mine from the swim team. Judy has been instructed to sexually satisfy you in any way you wish, at any time between today and next Friday. Upon your command, she will fuck you, give you blowjobs, and allow you to tie her up or do anything else to her that crosses your mind. The only limitations on what you can do are: 1. No permanent damage, of course. 2. No unprotected sex. 3. No bringing in other people. This gift is for you alone. I wouldn't want to fuck other guys for your birthday, so I don't see why my proxy should, either. "Oh, shit!" says Jeff; "I can't do this. It would be wrong!" No; actually Jeff ignores the moral ambiguity of the situation and decides not to look a gift whore in the mouth. Oh - and he decides to forgive Monica! My immediate reaction was: What if this is a hoax? I mean, how does Jeff really know that Monica is behind the alleged gift? What if Swimmer (the name given to the slave/present) is just an itinerant sex maniac who wants to give him a week of unmitigated bliss? In addition, I'm not a lawyer or a prostitute or anything like that, but isn't there a possibility of a bad precedent here? Couldn't a spouse caught in the act simply claim, "Hey! She told me she was a present from you!?" Being a Master can be tough. For example, what does a Master do when the slave wants to do the dishes but the master wants a blowjob? Such conflicts are common and could result in violations of health codes in parts of Australia. Jeff's predicament is further complicated by the fact that Swimmer is an excellent maid and cook: June Cleaver crossed with Pauline Reage. I mean, this lady actually accepts rear entries while she cooks pancakes in the nude - generating as a by-product a small but delicious supply of syrup for the pancakes! In addition, while having a sex slave merely distracts a guy from doing research, it makes listening to a Statistics lecture damn near impossible! There could be a TV series in this: "Touched by a Swimmer." The show could be completely devoid of both plot and acting ability, except for attractive but insipid protagonists who mysteriously can do almost anything while they jiggle their tits and toss their hair from side to side and spectators ogle their cute little asses. The show could convey educational tidbits like those in the story: edible underwear may be a novelty to see, but it is uncomfortable to wear, and it is awful to the taste. Thumbs down! Of course, the really "good parts" could not be shown on prime time television; these supplementary materials would have to be accessed via website or perhaps 900 chat lines. This idea is so crazy, it just might work! Sometimes I "disenjoy" stories that include sexual bondage. I get my back up and assume that pain and degradation are bad. But if the context is right - for example, if after the finale of the gangbang the target's entire body is coated in a mixture of sweat, cum, chocolate, and whipped cream, showing dark marks where the participants had poured the hot caramel, her blond hair matted to her skin and to itself by strings of semen, bruised around the thighs, butt, and breasts, where six men have pawed her continuously throughout the evening, and a huge smile on her face - well, then maybe bondage not so bad after all. This was a creative, well written story. I hope to see many more by this author. "The Bitches Upstairs" by Mandible (" mandible"@deaths.door). This one is listed as "BITCHES" on its title line, but its real title is "The Bitches Upstairs." That's not the only thing about this story that is kind of hard to explain. The narrator and his roommate Gene call the girls upstairs the Bitches, because they are haughty and beautiful. You see - bitches try to put you in your place. If you get in a subordinate place when they put you there, you are a wimp as far as they are concerned. If you notice them but don't seem to care much, they are offended and try to attract you. If you become attracted, you can then be put in your place. An easy assumption of superiority usually works wonders on them. Our narrator has acted as though he'd just come from visiting a chick way better than them, and barely noticed them. So he is one leg up on them, so to speak. So one day after Gene has gone home for vacation the phone rings and a sexy voice tells him, "If you can get up here in five minutes with a pitcher of margaritas, you can have a blow job." He declines of course; but then since it is impossible to decline cum (see first note at the beginning of this issue) he hauls ass upstairs, but discovers that it is a prank. But then all three Bitches make it up to him. This is an improbable but delightful story. "Bonnie" by Friar Dave (Friar_Dave@mhbbs.com). Dan has company for the weekend: his older but not-too-close cousin Mark, Mark's sexy sister-in-law Kate, their three nubile and buxom teenage daughters, and Kate's younger sister, the eponymous Bonnie. Well, on Day One of the visit, Mark reveals to Dan that Kate is insatiable, and he says that he'd like Dan to help out a bit in the bedroom. Dan, of course, declines. Then Dan tells Kate that the 15-year-old daughter has been making a play for him, and she promises to handle the situation. Meanwhile, 11-year-old Penny keeps asking innocent but precocious questions. All this before our eponymous heroine has even arrived on the scene! The action heats up after Bonnie's arrival. As the narrator says, "Broing!" {I'm working on a Word for the Day program. As you may have guessed, the Word for Today is "Legs." Spread the word!} One could regard this story as a treatise on ways to deflate an aroused cock - some using cold water and some using more interesting methods. One could also regard this story as an example of semi-responsible hedonism. I wonder if anyone has ever used that term before. I like Friar Dave. I really do. But as I started reading this story, I couldn't help saying to myself, "Aha! I've got him. This story is too disjointed to earn straight 10's." But alas! He managed to pull it off. That's the breaks, I guess. This is a really sexy story. "Cain and Abel" by Taria (Taria29b@aol.com). This is NOT predominantly a sexy story, but it does involve sex. I believe there are people who would become sexually aroused if they thought about this story, but I myself did not. Since I am trying to review this story without ruining it for you, I cannot tell you much about it, because part of the pleasure lies in letting you figure out what it is that the author is talking about. Let me just say that this is a well written story and that the title creatively associates the events in this story with the biblical story of Cain and Abel. Although conspiracy enthusiasts may disagree with me, I am confident that this story is not an accurate depiction of historical events (because, of course, I know the real truth). That's enough! If you want to know more, read the story; it's exactly 500 words long. If the author had room for one more word, I know exactly what that word would be: BLAM! "Camara, Lady of the Sword" by Tom Bombadil (stbush@iglou.com). This story purports to be an ancient epic about Lady Camara of Tyberion (pronounced Ka- ma'-rah, similar to cabana), a swordsman, archer, and minor mage, who is skilled in unarmed combat as well as with many weapons. She is highly knowledgeable in diverse areas, especially healing. Camara's stories may only be told late in the evening, when innocent children, and even some innocent wives and husbands, have retired. Few are unaffected by the proper telling of her tales, though the reactions are often mixed. Thou hast been warned! {I made that last sentence up myself!} An epic is an extended narrative - usually (but not in this case) in poetic format - that celebrates in elevated or dignified language the feats of a legendary or traditional hero. In the days before cable TV and arcade games, bards used to travel from town to town and castle to castle and relate epics while listeners consumed mead. Epics don't have a climax and denouement that follow the pattern of a normal novel or modern movie, and this may be irksome to some readers. I am not a sword and sorcery fan; in fact, I have a sneaking suspicion that magick doesn't work at all and that life would be uninteresting if it did. {I get tired of the rules constantly changing and the ever-present deus ex machina to solve serious problems in unrealistic ways.} Nevertheless, I enjoyed this tale, which presented interesting and exciting sexual activities in the exotic context of Camara's quest for the medallion of King Merovance and her simultaneous search for meaning in her life. It was a very good story. Like most epics, this story is presented through the eyes of the bard, who is reciting the tale to an assembled multitude and who occasionally digresses to tell another tale at the request of a Lord or Lady. Although you'll want to read this entire story, the lengthy tale (360K) is subdivided into nine chapters that permit the reader to enjoy the epic in smaller installments. "Carole" by Kim (Ghost@nym.alias.net). Why is Kim leaving the bar with her panties in her pocket, and what does this have to do with Christmas? Well, it's because she had been thinking about her present (meaning now, not a gift) and then somebody was kind enough to show her a possible future. In short, she has met Carole, who had put the scroo in Scrooge. The sex in this story isn't actively sexy, but it's still an important part of a very good story. Kim weaves together several separate, vivid incidents into a good slice-of-life plot. Kim doesn't start this story with a claim that it is "true"; and I seriously doubt that these things really happened to her exactly as she describes them. Nevertheless, this story has a ring of authenticity to it that is often missing in stories on this newsgroup. The only problem - and it's really a minor one - is that Kim should have consulted her proofreader before going to press with this story. Another 24 hours and one more set of revisions could have made this an even better story. "Charly the Yard Guy" by Michael K. Smith (mksmith1@swbell.net). Yard-guy sex is actually a fairly popular topic when women meet in sewing circles, at the hairdresser's, or even at PTA executive meetings. There's something about a muscular young man in a sweaty tee-shirt that outlines and emphasizes those muscles that brings out the libido in the everyday housewife. I don't personally know anyone who has actually fucked her yard guy, but I have heard some wild claims and have had lots of friends who have incorporated the yard guy into fantasies later in the evening. Come to think of it, I DID make love to my yard guy just last week, but I had him take a shower with me first to get rid of all those little pieces of grass and herbicides that aren't really all that sexy. Of course, the mitigating circumstance in my case is that I am married to my yard guy. Anyway, in the present story Charly the Yard Guy is actually Charlene the 16-year-old Yard Girl, who takes over the job of doing extensive yard work for the 35-year-old neighbor when her brothers can no longer do the work. She quickly becomes more than a yard worker. Although the older man tries to resist the relationship, they fall in love and move swiftly along to a tender and happy ending. There are people who would label this a pedophile relationship, but that's a silly oversimplification. I'm not sure about this (in fact, I'm just making it up), but I think the odds for happiness would actually be in FAVOR of a really responsible and sensitive 16-year-old who wanted to develop a mature relationship with a 35-year-old man - as long as the man is also a mature, sensible man rather than a horny asshole. The main reason to discourage such relationships is that the result would be a tremendous loss of worthwhile women from the dating pool for horny 16-year-old boys who couldn't compete with the sophistication and sensitivity of their more mature competitors. If my daughter finds this story, I want to remind her that not all that many middle-aged men who flirt with teenagers are as wonderful as the guy in this story. I would also like to remind the guy that statutory rape is still a punishable offense that is prosecuted in most jurisdictions in the western world. Some people are put off by stories about taboo subjects. It's important to keep in mind that people are interested in taboo subjects because to some extent these topics ARE fascinating and attractive. There have been numerous great books in literature and award-winning films in which the "forbidden relationship" plays a tantalizing part. What will happen when the strong- willed vivacious southern belle falls in love with a man who is married to someone else or with a man whose allegiance to the South is seriously questioned? What will happen when Gregory Peck is assigned to an air base in England during World War II and faces the extraordinary danger of probably dying in battle far away from his wife at home while he is in close contact with a beautiful British woman? What will happen when a widower who is ready to marry the beautiful love of his life and resume his normal existence is suddenly confronted by his former wife, who wasn't dead after all but has merely been the victim of amnesia? Blindly denying that these stories are interesting does not reduce their attractiveness. In real life, situations like these may cause really serious complications and emotional problems. I used to be amazed (watching reruns, of course) at how much stress Little Joe used to be able to tolerate on the Ponderosa. The poor guy had a fiancee die at least every fourth episode, his parents or brothers kidnapped almost weekly, and he had amnesia at least twice a year. The poor little kid on The Rifleman had it even worse: each week, a group of homicidal maniacs would rob a bank, beat up his father, kidnap him (I think his name was Marcus), and repulse his father (Lucas) the first time he tried to rescue him. Then these assholes would be in position to kill both Marcus and Lucas and sometimes also Micah plus an itinerant neighbor, when the Old Man would whip out his rifle and kill all six of the bad guys on the spot. In real life, that's stress; but that's what fiction is for. Getting back to sex, I think it's a really bad idea for a man to get into a relationship with a sexy nymphomaniac who eventually refuses to let go of him and boils the family rabbit on the kitchen stove or for a woman to become a call girl that gets sent on a shopping spree by a handsome rich guy with whom she eventually falls in love. It's not all that likely that such stories would have happy endings in real life; but "Fatal Attraction" and "Pretty Woman" are really good movies. Worrying about the moral ambiguity of these movies simply makes it less likely that you will enjoy them or profit from the vicarious experiences they convey. So if any of you assholes out there decide to seduce my teenage daughter, you can assume that your life will become stressful. I'll grant the POSSIBILITY that she might become happy with a guy twice her age; and in fact, if things happened to her just the way they happen in this story, that would be just swell. But I'm going to bet on her having a lot of fun with kids her own age and marrying a guy I consider to be a kid and all that neat kind of crap. "Chosen" by Tom Bombadil (stbush@iglou.com). The woman is a lawyer aspiring to become a partner in an important law firm. She receives a letter telling her that she has been "chosen." She thinks it's a joke and tosses it aside, but then she discovers that several other people (including her boss) know about her selection and consider it to be an important honor. At this point I paused and noted to myself that this author is on a Deirdre binge. If he's trying to imitate Deirdre, I told myself, then the least I can do is imitate my reviews of Deirdre. That means I should try to predict the ending. This shouldn't be hard. The woman will resist briefly but within a day will accept the invitation and arrive at the designated place. She will be met by a stern woman whom she will eventually learn to address as Mistress. She will find herself naked in a room with lots of other naked women, and within a couple of weeks she will learn to answer to the wishes of whoever happens to be her Master or Mistress. This whole new lifestyle will make her eminently but mysteriously happy. Well, I was close. I won't bother you with the details of where I went astray. The interesting thing is that even though I had a pretty good idea where the story was probably going, the author held my attention all the way up to the end of the story. The constant state of tension was really well maintained. The author himself said he was disappointed with this as a "Deirdre-esq." It's a bit long for the Deirdre genre, but I thought he did an excellent job. In fact, I think he did a better job here than in "Deck," where he thought he had finally reached Deirdre euphoria. Like Deirdre's stories, this one lets the narrator make seemingly logical choices that get her into a really bizarre situation involving sexual taboos. Also like Deirdre, the author maintains the tension of the story masterfully; and most importantly, at the end all of the details make perfect sense. With many of Deirdre's stories I have been left with the impression that "this is a silly story but I can't explain why." That's the reaction I experienced at the end of this story: it made no sense, but yet it made perfect sense. "Christmas Break" by Mat Twassel (mmtwassel@aol.com). The man is sitting in his office, watching the consultant finish up her work at the computer. The company makes screen savers, and he doesn't know for sure whether she is testing his in-house version, which contains embedded erotic events . He also can't help thinking about the doorknob in her hotel room and the wonderful things the consultant might do to herself before or after a shower. Eventually, he confronts her on the elevator with a mild sexual innuendo. For the denouement, you'll have to read this delightful story yourself. "A Cold Day in Hell" by Delta (delta*@bc.sympatico.ca). Miller is an electronics repairman. He just wants to be left alone. His one true love has gone away, and he doesn't want to take chances again. It's not that life has no meaning: it's just that the meaning comes from the feeling of triumph when a piece of broken electronic equipment springs back to life. Then he finds a homeless young woman and brings her home - not for sex, but simply because he just couldn't leave her there on the street. You can probably figure out where this story is going, but it's still very interesting to see how Delta gets us there. Besides, you might be surprised! This is a long, good story with very little sex. But the long, good part of the story makes the short, erotic part very sexy. "The Computer Flirt" by Taria (TariaT@aol.com). This is an extremely creative and sexy story. It's about two ladies who contact another lady online for cybersex. Kim gives Alicia and Diana the instructions, and they do what they are told. A good time is had by all - including the reader. I strongly recommend this story. Cybersex is an interesting topic. There are two reasons why I myself don't cyber: (1) I would never really know who the person is on the other end and (2) I don't like the idea of playing with relationships . Three reasons actually - I'm also extremely happy with what I've got. The upside of cybersex is that it can be extremely safe. You can engage in really exotic or kinky stuff without risk of STDs or physical harm. You don't even have to know about bad breath or middle-age bulges or any other physical features that might interfere with more direct relationships. In addition, you are limited only by your imagination; and as this story shows, you can combine cybersex with actual sex. But there can be some downsides. Please don't take this as a sermon. Maybe I am being excessively cautious. My suggestion is simply that you think before you pop your cybercherry. First, I wouldn't really know who the other person is. It could be a guy pretending to be a girl (or vice versa) or an eight-year-old pretending to be twenty-eight. It could be a person on the rebound from a shaky relationship who expects more from cybersex than I am willing to give. Real, in-person, direct relationships are risky; but online relationships are extremely open to deception. You may not care, but at least sometimes the possibility of deception would bother me. Second, I don't want to jeopardize my relationship with my husband by becoming really intimate with someone else. I know it's across cyberspace, but intimacy is intimacy. I may start out being frivolous and find things getting serious. Even more problematic is the fact that I wouldn't really know the personality or state of mind of the person I'm cybering with. For example, he may SAY he wants to just have fun, but he may actually be lonely and expect a lot more than I am willing to give. So how does cybersex differ from sex stories? Well, sex stories are clearly fiction and they are not interactive. No real personalities are directly involved. For example, I can get all hot and bothered about a story, but at least I know my relationship to the author. Quite likely lots and lots of you disagree with me, and I sincerely hope you have fun with your cybersex. I merely suggest that you think before you hump - er, jump. "Conventional Sex" by theGreatxIam. The best thing about this sex story is that it is much more story than sex, but it's still a great sex story. The narrator is an 8th-grader in a Catholic school of the 60's. His hormones have begun to emerge, and he is interested in shedding his image of class geek. He resorts to pulling a prank on the nuns. He and his friend pull a commando raid into the convent, and it goes awry. His friend is caught, and the narrator finds himself in the cell of a naked nun. And a very beautiful naked nun at that. She becomes his ally and tries to help him escape, but this effort is thwarted by the pastor's two lean Dobermans. Returning to the safety of the nun's room, the boy recognizes in the naked nun some basic elements of anatomy that he has seen only in Playboy magazine. In short, he has now seen as much of Sister Juliet as he has ever seen of any woman, even on paper. Good Golly, Sister Molly! Alas, the poor lad has no means of egress and is essentially cloistered in close quarters with a naked and nubile nun. Well, they don't cover this sort of thing in nun school, and there is no patron saint whose job is to watch over oversexed teenagers putting the moves on nuns. To put it succinctly, the boy becomes attracted to more than the nape of the neck of the naked and nubile nun and they fuck happily and harmoniously throughout the night. If you can set aside the rather tenuous assumption that the two nasty neophytes are on their way to eternal perdition, you will find the sex to be passionate and arousing. Except for an age difference that once was the topic of an algebra problem on the SAT (Sister Juliet was one year short of being twice as old as her young lover, who was twelve years younger than she....), this young nun is in essentially the same position as Julie Andrews in "The Sound of Music." My rather non-tenuous assumption is that once a nun falls off the boat, she might as well fall way off the boat - and maybe even learn to swim. As a former Catholic school student, I enjoyed this story immensely. And so the Seven Dwarfs stayed overnight at a convent near a wildlife preserve. The next morning, the committee of six sent a representative to the mother superior to ask if there were any nuns who were under three feet tall. When the reply was negative, these six began chanting, "Grumpy fucked a penguin, Grumpy fucked a penguin!" "Correspondence" by Taria (Taria29c@aol.com). Tari has gone away to college, and so has her friend Kathy. These letters from Tari to Kathy summarize her sexual growth during her college years. If you have ever read someone else's personal letters, you know how interesting (or how boring!) this can be. The letters are more interesting if the writer is spontaneous and honest, and those words describe Tari in this story. There's really not much else I can tell you about this story, except that I think you'll enjoy it. I know I did. At first I found this story to be a "difficult read," because the style was jerky and there were some punctuation problems; but then I realized that the author was trying to imitate the style of an undergrad who was hurriedly writing her private thoughts to her best friend. After the first two letters, I got used to the style and enjoyed the rest of the story immensely. "Costumes" by Lord Malinov (malinov@mindless.com). The author does an excellent job making the lewd and lovely, lithe and lascivious Diana seem eminently fuckable long before the real action commences. Rarely a day goes by when Diana doesn't surprise the narrator, and today she has decided to brighten their daily ambiance with a simple but tasty - er, tasteful - orgy. However, the main action occurs in her retelling of her first multiple-partner debauchery, while the narrator stimulates her to orgasm. In fact, if you are currently taking a course where you are required to report on a story that runs parallel to the Canterbury Tales, this one might be a good selection. The tail within a tale takes place at a Halloween party during which inhibitions have disappeared and people are using sexually explicit tactile clues to guess the identities of the still-masked people. As usual at such fictional parties, a good time is had by all. The titillation of sex with known-but-unknown sexual partners is extremely well done. The author has orchestrated an orgy in a manner that would make Mark Aster and the Allen Sisters proud to participate. "The Curiosity Shop" by Sven the Elder (sven@brass-neck.demon.co.uk). If I were writing clever one-liners to entice people to read this story, I would say, "Sven has gone Christmas shopping, but he finds a surprise present for himself!" The surprise present is the lovely and vivacious Jo, whose full name is too long to print here and whose husband is away while his wife must play. This is a delightful little story that will take your mind off the burdens of last-minute Christmas shopping. Rarely do Americans find a woman who hunkers down and lets a man find her centre. Apparently that sort of thing is fairly common on the Island. It sounds like a custom worth exporting. "CYBER-CHARADE" by s.a.m. (s.a.m@usa.net). This is a brief collection of erotic poetry written in free verse. I tend to shy away from poetry in these reviews, but this is really excellent stuff - the sort of thing high school students who don't read this newsgroup could turn in as their poetry assignment, because the teacher could not accuse them of plagiarism without admitting that they read this newsgroup. Of course, the flaw in this reasoning is that the students would probably get expelled for writing obscene poetry anyway. "A Daughter's Breasts" by Mark Aster (myfrthal@aol.com). The nubile teenager roles over and smiles at her father. "Fuck me, Daddy! Cum all over my tits! Put a baby inside me!" That's the sort of plot that this title might suggest; but since Mark Aster wrote this story, it's nothing at all like that. The father does not spray his spunk all over her ass or even talk dirty about buckets of cum in ways never seen before on the Web. Instead, we have a meditation by a father on the emerging adolescence of his young daughter. The Old Man recalls his own youth and wonders what the current agents of chaos are thinking about when they put the moves on his little girl. (Continued in Part 2) -- +--------------' Story submission `-+-' Moderator contact `------------+ | story-submit@qz.little-neck.ny.us | story-admin@qz.little-neck.ny.us | | Archive site +--------------------+------------------+ Newsgroup FAQ |