Message-ID: <47514asstr$1082261402@assm.asstr-mirror.org> Return-Path: X-Original-To: ckought69@hotmail.com Delivered-To: ckought69@hotmail.com X-Original-Path: not-for-mail From: cobillard@hotmail.com (Carol) X-Original-Message-ID: <2a28f2d7.0404162308.196fa135@posting.google.com> Content-Transfer-Encoding: 8bit NNTP-Posting-Date: Sat, 17 Apr 2004 08:01:23 +0000 (UTC) X-Spamscanner: mailbox2.ucsd.edu (v1.4 Mar 10 2004 15:18:19, 6.7/5.0 2.63) X-MailScanner: PASSED (v1.2.8 22547 i3H81PTe025122 mailbox2.ucsd.edu) X-ASSTR-Original-Date: 17 Apr 2004 01:01:23 -0700 Subject: {ASSM} The Second Annual Best Penis Contest Lines: 459 Date: Sun, 18 Apr 2004 00:10:02 -0400 Path: assm.asstr-mirror.org!not-for-mail Approved: Newsgroups: alt.sex.stories.moderated,alt.sex.stories Followup-To: alt.sex.stories.d X-Archived-At: X-Moderator-Contact: ASSTR ASSM moderation X-Story-Submission: X-Moderator-ID: hecate, dennyw When I was at college (the state university that I attended for the last two years of my college education), a friend of mine, a girl who belonged to a sorority, and I dreamed up a contest as something of a lark. I had told her the story my mother had related to me about the plaster casters, a bunch of English groupies in the 1960s who were written up by Ellen Sander in The Realist. http://www.ellensander.com/buybooksrock.html Later I found out that there is an even more famous American plaster caster, Cynthia Albritton, a/k/a Cynthia Plaster Caster. http://www.cynthiaplastercaster.com/ http://www.dazereader.com/cynthiaplaster.htm What she and the ones described Ellen Sander did was to hang around rock stars and male celebrities, and using the alginates http://www.makeupmania.com/Details/dentalimpression.cfm and plaster of Paris used by dentists to make dental molds, create models of erect penises. It should be no surprise that to get the very best erections, they would use oral sex and bring their subject near to the point of ejaculation, but no further. At least until the cast was complete. (A Google search under shows that kits for doing this are easily available today, so there must be a subculture doing this still.) My sorority-member friend and I made a cast of the penis of some boy we knew and then labeled it "Best Penis of 1999", pretending that there had been a "first annual Best Penis award". (Making the model of the purported 1999 winner wasn't so easy as the stories we'd read led us to believe, but after wasting the first kit we did get a reasonably good facsimile of a stiff penis.) We then put up fliers promoting the "second annual Best Penis contest", but without much in the way of specifics, other than a cell phone number and e-mail address where messages could be left. When the affair got to be the talk of the campus, we went further, and fixed a date for the "final selection" and instructing candidates to submit nude photos and an essay ("25 words or less", naturally) on why their penis was the best. We knew this test would weed out the creeps and the self-absorbed: in the ideal essays we wanted to read that the boy had a "caring penis" that was "attentive to a girl's wants and needs": in other words, that he was as much concerned with his girl's climax as his own and that he wasn't just an arrogant show-off and exhibitionist. To be objective, we also set out some standards we would use, but we didn't tell the boys in advance what they were. They were in order of importance: 1. General appearance. We only would consider circumcised penises, so we could appraise the full beauty and shape of the organ. A high score under this category would imply a penis of some prominence when flaccid, substantial but not excessive pubic hair, a distinct corona and well-formed glans. (I have written about circumcision before, and I've mentioned that a lot of people -- not just me -- feel strongly one way or the other. Suffice to say we who were sponsoring the contest thought penises were sexier when circumcised. Mostly this criterion related to the appearance of the penis while flaccid. A boy could gain a couple of points on this if he had attractive pubic hair and had brushed it, and if his body wasn't otherwise too hairy. We were in agreement that size was somewhat less important in terms of the erect penis than in its appearance when soft: we hoped for average length when erect but for an impressive appearance when flaccid, although the penis should not extend, when flaccid, below the scrotum. Again, this was a matter of taste, so to speak, and others might differ.) 2. Personality, personal habits, cleanliness, scent, appearance of hair, and all the other stuff that matters when a guy isn't wearing any clothes 3. Proportionality and shape. Penis and scrotum should look good together, and look good in juxtaposition to the boy's physique. We want to be able to fondle a boy's balls and to admire their shape and texture, so the scrotum mustn't be too shriveled. (With that in mind, we had turned up the heat in the room in time for the event.) The penis should not be cone-shaped, narrower at the tip than at its base; on the other hand, a wider, majestic, rounded tip would be lovely. 4. Quality of erection, including ease of arousal, stiffness, tension and so on. Also how quickly the penis can be made strongly erect again following ejaculation and how long an erection can be maintained. At erection the penis must stand straight up, taut and close to the body. 5. Self-control, and consideration towards the female partner. Premature ejaculation or failure to give priority to the girl's arousal and climax would bring automatic failure. 6. Quality and quantity of semen. Including viscosity, color, opacity, taste and anything else we thought appropriate. Admittedly, very subjective. (We had agreed we'd give extra credit for pre-cum, but in the event there wasn't any to be found, however closely we looked at the tips of the candidates' penises.) 7. Functionality. Some of this duplicates criteria above. Ultimately the most important element would be how a boy acts in the seconds leading up to ejaculation, but it also includes something we call "vibrancy of the penis". (I love feeling a boy's heartbeat, his pulse, through his penis and his mounting excitement as he approaches orgasm. In exchange, I will always try to prolong a boy's pleasure and keep stimulating the tip of his penis with my tongue and lips until every last drop of semen has spurted out. We would rate "functionality" mostly on the boy's comportment in those final seconds after the "point of no return" when ejaculation is unstoppable.) 8. Facial expressions and communication (vocal expression; I dare not use the word "oral" here, that fits better in other criteria, including #9). 9. Foreplay and afterplay fun. Very subjective. 10. Style: this is a catch-all for everything from appearance when dressed to posture and sexiness while undressing himself and, if relevant, undressing his date. It also includes the way he carries himself and his penis when walking or moving about. We'd hoped to get lots and lots of candidates, but in the end we only got 16 of them. And we didn't get a lot of judges either. The nice thing was that we didn't have to tell anybody how few candidates there had really been, we just had to announce that after careful study and examination of the pictures and the essays, we had narrowed the field down to six finalists and that they should come to the sorority house at 9 pm on such-and-such a day. I had wanted to have six girls available to try out the boys, one for each. But by the appointed day there were only my friend and I plus one other girl, and a couple of other girls who offered to be "observers" without committing themselves to actually do anything besides watch. Also on the day, only five of the six boys showed up, all looking somewhat sheepish, as if they had entered the contest on a bet, or their friends had forced them into it. I wanted to see their penises right away, but that would have been crude, so we proceeded more tactfully and discreetly. There were five boys lined up. We had them undress down to their underpants and the three of us judges took off our own jeans and tops, leaving bikinis that we were wearing underneath. I hadn't expected the atmosphere to be quite as nervous and strained as it seemed to be; I had hoped in fact to re-create the atmosphere of our nude parties and dances in Our Town. So I brought out some beer and put on some music and suggested that we just chat for a few minutes so we could address the personality and general appearance issues. We girls did not undress quite yet because I didn't want the boys to get too excited; part of the contest would be to judge their arousal process. The other thing was that most of the losers would not be having sex that night and I wanted the losers to leave graciously when the time came. After a huddle with my co-judges, we agreed that we judges would disrobe only after we had reduced the field of candidates to three finalists, and when it was necessary to provoke erections that we could assess for quality and responsiveness. After a while, thinking that the boys were mellowed enough by a couple of bottles of beer, I handed out the criteria sheets and told the boys to line up. My friend then would take down their underpants ("boxers or briefs", as the case might be, although in fact, presumably because of the nature of the event, they were all wearing briefs, with beautiful bulges to show off their penises to best advantage). It was, as always, fun to watch the penises come into view as the boys' underpants were lowered, and to make initial judgments about them. I was a little disappointed at first, though, by the lineup, which struck me more as a row of candidates for conscription in the Army than candidates for a penis beauty contest. But after the three of us contrived to touch the boys on the pretext of putting them in a straight line and having them stand upright, and after we moved them into brighter light, the atmosphere improved. I had to tell the boys to stop whispering to each other, and to pay attention to the judges, who pretended to take notes. As it turned out, it was easy to eliminate two of the candidates. One had submitted a photo of somebody else, and the other arrogantly thought that since he possessed, or thought he possessed, the biggest penis on campus he should automatically win. Out the door they went, the two of them. They wouldn't even get to see me naked, much less put their penises to use with us. There were now three boys left standing, and the three of us in bikinis (not the two observers, who remained dressed and in the background the whole time) took them off. The two other judges were rather clinical in the way they went about feeling the penises, and I wasn't surprised that they didn't get them erect right away. A lot of the more difficult criteria didn't matter anymore since there weren't many candidates left: shape, texture, complexion, appearance and feel of testicles and scrotum, tactile responsiveness and facial response -- these were the points to look for. To create an even playing field on the matter of erection, I told the others to watch me, and take notes on the results. Balancing each penis on my tongue in turn and vibrating just underneath the glans in the most sensitive area, it was easy to get each boy very excited. I like to think the closeness of my breasts had something to do with it, too. (In retrospect I think it was a mistake for me to have done that if only because I try not to get that close to two or more boys on a single day, but I knew it was an effective way to stimulate and arouse, and it seemed a good idea at the time.) Now we could see better the relationship (size, shape, proportion, spatial relationship) between penis and balls and judge "penile sexiness" which, when it came down to judging (although we didn't say this out loud) meant which penis each of us would like to have in our mouth and our vagina. A penis should come across, when erect, as strong, confident and passionate; these are not qualities that are related in any linear way to size, and they depend to a good degree on the way a boy carries himself. And on the way he smiles romantically and with anticipation. The sight of glistening drops of seminal fluid seeping out of the tip of an excited boy's penis always enhances its beauty, and underlines these qualities. I announced that the contest was a close one, that we could only decide after we had made molds of each penis, and that the model would be made later from the winner's mold. My friend got the mixtures ready, and we set about making each penis really stiff before creating the mold by kissing and licking it. Well, one guy disqualified himself by coming in the girl's mouth even before we could make the mold. I told him he could sit back and watch if he liked, and we would get to him later with third prize, such as it might be. Actually there wasn't any third prize beyond what he'd already gotten, but I didn't want to waste time with explanations and if he left just then he might spoil the secrecy of the contest. Also, notwithstanding his lack of self-control, his penis was attractive to and there was no point in having him get dressed just yet. I assumed, correctly, that watching us continue the contest would give him another erection soon enough. It doesn't take too long for modern alginates to harden, and then the mold can be pulled off the penis. We got some warm wet washcloths and some towels, and cleaned off the two boys. Their penises really were lovely, and it was going to be hard to choose between them. I liked the one who had a perfectly global head on his penis and a very distinct corona. It had seemed to vibrate in my mouth, something that always makes me feel good. I told him he should bring me to orgasm in the best way he knew how. It must have been obvious to him that if this was a girl-driven contest, he was going to have to make love to my clitoris with his tongue, and that's what he started to do. His tongue was very steady, and because I was sitting down in a chair and he was kneeling in front of me, I could see his penis bobbing about. I hadn't wanted to prompt him or influence him in any way, but it must have been obvious when I started to climax, and then he signaled to me to hold my legs apart so the judges could see, and his penis was in my vagina and when he ejaculated there was, it seemed, semen all over. When his penis came out of me, it was completely wet and shiny and I wanted to kiss it and taste the semen. I passed up the chance, though, because I wanted to preserve, to the limited extent I still could, my judicial probity. The other finalist obviously learned from mine, because he performed similarly with my friend. He really seemed to enjoy her vagina, and he kept his eyes focused on hers most of the time. He repeatedly kissed her clitoris, ran his tongue all around her vaginal opening and then pushed it inside as far as it would go. He grasped her underside with both hands and pressed his face practically inside her until she started to scream in pleasure. Then he pulled her legs up the way mine had been, so the judges could see his penis enter her. His penis was so stiff and tight against his body that it seemed to hurt, though, when he pulled it down to penetrate her. He had to lean forward to bring it down to the level of her vagina, and he struggled a bit to push it between her labia minora and slide it home. Once he had entered her, he started moving his body rapidly back and forth, his penis darting in and out with no sign of finesse or of passion. His movement was so fast that his penis became a blur. I like slower movements, and he should have asked his girl what she liked. Gentleness is an art; beyond that, slow and steady movement of the penis allows the partners to concentrate on each other. This boy was watching his penis, not his girl's face. It's also nice, when an audience is looking on, for the boy to draw his penis out almost completely every so often. Not so it springs away and has to be re-inserted, but so the crown at least is visible since the head of the penis is its most beautiful part. When the girl is sitting back and the boy standing before her, she may like to see his whole body, including his whole stiff penis making love to her and his testicles and scrotum too. And he should move gently and slowly at that point, watching his partner to see what makes her happy, what gives her pleasure. Another problem with the boy, not his fault I don't think, but it cost him a point or two in the contest, was that we couldn't see much in the way of semen, either because his penis was deep inside her when it all spurted out or because he just didn't ejaculate in quantity. Maybe, even, he'd had sex or had masturbated earlier in the day in a deliberate attempt to slow down his response during the contest. Since (perhaps somewhat unfairly) we hadn't published our criteria beforehand, he couldn't have known how much credit he would get for drawing out his (and his girl's) passion. Actually, only now does it occur to me that it was never obvious that the candidates would be having sex at all, and he might have been worried about too much (rather than too little) tumescence. If he's thought that we were going to rate him solely on a naturist basis, with a soft penis, he was, of course, mistaken. And at the time, I thought we'd made our intentions obvious, especially since the 1999 "winner's" plaster cast was there in the sorority house, in pride of place, for anyone to see. On another matter, the two of us who initiated the event had intended to insist upon condoms, and we'd forgotten in the heat of passion: not such a good idea, and it wasn't the first time for me to forget, either. Another unexpected point was that each of us would vote for the boy who had brought us, individually, to climax. Fortunately we had three other judges, including the one who otherwise would have judged the disqualified boy who had ejaculated into her mouth. My boy won the contest, 3 votes to 2. On the occasion, I didn't want to vaunt my qualifications and experience, so I made use of legalese and cited points from the contest rules to justify the decisions I was making. The observer judges were too embarrassed to analyze the event in any detail, and all they would say to the boys was that they thought the winner had self-control and style, and that otherwise the two penises were really both very lovely. As I interpreted it, they agreed with me that the runner-up went too fast, and that even though he had used a position that exposed his penis and his girl's vaginal opening, we were made uncomfortable by his rushing about. As his girl had already been brought virtually to climax by cunnilingus, I'm sure she didn't lose by it, and of course he got her vote. But sex isn't a race; I've quoted Mae West enough times on that (namely her song, "A Guy What Takes His Time"). To see a penis slide slowly and gently into and out of a girl's mouth, or her vagina, until the beautiful rush of semen from the little slit at its tip (even if all you see at first consists of a few drips) is a timeless sequence of beauty and love and joy. Concurrent orgasms are great in concept, but they almost never happen in real life. And when they do, they are diminished by the distraction they involve on the part of both girl and boy. Still, there is scarcely such a thing as "bad" sex on an occasion when both girl and boy have had orgasms. The two boys both got "passing marks", if that was at issue. The third boy had not, and at this point he piped up, "What about me?" The third judge had been so aroused by the sight of us at sex, that she asked him playfully if he could really come again, and she put a condom on him and they had sex. He brought her to climax with his hand after his second orgasm, not his tongue: a losing proposition in any contest I would judge, but then he wasn't in the running anymore anyway. Still, if he was annoyed at losing it his annoyance shouldn't have been directed at us. We couldn't make a mold of his penis anyway if he was going to have the misfortune, so to speak, of coming in the mouth of the girl who was trying to get his penis hard in the first place. One of the sad things about having to use condoms is that you never get the fun of collecting, tasting, savoring and swallowing lovely, not to forget sacred, semen. It just doesn't make the fantastic and arousing picture for people watching as does a beautiful naked penis finding its way into a dilated vagina. The compromise is not to use a condom for oral sex, but once one has grown out of teen years and beyond the closed, protective environment we had, there are all kinds of STDs about, and some of them can't be cured. So, as I've written before, I can only reflect with nostalgia on the days when free and uninhibited sex was safe sex. (The New York Times recently had an article on how even the most careful health controls can fail when sex partners range beyond a closed circuit: http://www.geocities.com/cob145/nyt_hiv.htm ) So I molded my boy's penis out of plaster of Paris, and it got inscribed by a girl who was really good at calligraphy with the label "Second Annual Best Penis Award - Best Penis of 2000". I continued to see my winning boy for a while, but although he really did have one of the best penises in the world, and no doubt the best penis on campus, the relationship didn't get very far beyond lovely sex and mutual orgasm. Still, his contest victory wasn't something he could put on his c.v., and it did make him the butt of some jokes on campus. Be that as it may, I will always remember his penis, beautiful at rest and even more beautiful fully erect. It really did deserve the Best Penis of 2000 award that it got, and I imagine that people, girls anyway, admire it still when they see it in statuette at its place of honor in the sorority house. I think of it, myself, sometimes, imagining the way it looked when, as we made love, I would draw it out of my mouth, its head thickly coated with semen. I would gaze at it, hope that others admired it and admired and envied me, then I would suck the semen into my mouth and swallow it. I learned early on how sexy that was, from playing with some of the cute boys I met when we lived in the houseboat. Mentioning that way of demonstrating romantic enjoyment by toying with a boy's semen provides an occasion to explain the difference between the kind of boys and men I relate to and those, more coarse or common types who see girls and women only as sluts and instruments of their own pleasure. I could hardly have an interest in a boy who didn't find pleasing me and kissing my clitoris a source of pleasure for himself. My partner will want me to take his penis into my mouth because it gives me pleasure to do so, and he will let me direct the time and place of his orgasm so that I can enjoy his semen the way I want to. In turn, he must enjoy my vagina for its own sake: its taste and aroma and texture. I will always reciprocate by drawing out his orgasm to the fullest, and taking his semen into my body with love.) Because of the shape and proportion of his penis, it looked especially grand when I did that. Usually, though, I was showing off only to him: there was neither the opportunity nor the impulse for the kind of exhibitionist sex that came naturally to me and to my friends when we were adolescents. Of course not all girls take an epicurean approach to semen; my own appreciation of it, and of the penis too, is related, of course, to my upbringing. As I've written, girls to come to sex early and happily and with parental support -- like kids who learn a foreign language when young -- seem to enjoy sex for its own sake as well as, in adulthood, a symbol of love and a shared experience with a committed partner. The situation, unsurprisingly, is quite different for girls who are abused and raped and prostituted, as in the sex trade and in pedophilic predation. Indeed, from what I've learned many naturist children, whether exposed or not to active sex, after puberty, have the same appreciation of sexual organs as objects of beauty and a similar lack of inhibition and guilt over sex, especially oral sex, for its own sake. It's because I learned early on that sex has importance and value for its own sake that, in the absence of a commitment of permanence -- marriage or the promise or likelihood of marriage -- I could never feel envy or jealousy over boys and sex, and it is a delight for me to share a boy. In effect, Mom taught me that absent mutuality of commitment, sexual exclusivity is best fixed one day at a time. This is connected to my absence of modesty, although it goes without saying that as one grows up and one's horizon expands to include others with a different past and different mores, the occasion for group nudity, nude dancing, and so on diminishes, and with it the occasion to see others having sex fun. That's a shame, since (as I have written) it magnifies one's own excitement to see others in parallel, to see, for example, another girl teasing her boy's penis, stroking it with her tongue, bringing it to the threshold of orgasm and ejaculation repeatedly before letting it fill her mouth with semen. At some of our parties, years ago, the electricity of shared experiences was an endless chain -- a Mobius strip -- of romance and orgasms. But Mom warned me years ago that it would have to end with maturity, and so it does. I should note that while Grecian beauty is there for appreciation and admiration, functionality, which we rated only seventh among criteria for our contest, has to be number one in the context of partnership and marriage. The same is true of breasts: lactation efficiency is not particularly related to external beauty. But our contest was, after all, intended as a fun event, a joke really. Although we didn't have enough contestants to be representative of the whole campus, much less the whole state university, I think the penis we chose was, in a word, grand. To say that, indeed to hold a beauty contest for the nicest penis, is not to exaggerate the appearance over functionality, and indeed that's why we decided not to have a pure lineup of studs but rather to select a few attractive guys and to experiment with them. Those who know me -- or who have read my essays -- will be aware that I'm all in favor of instant passion and lovely bodies. On the other hand, I know that to be unrepresentative of the world at large, which includes the less than beautiful and even the less than functional. So: we flaunted our youth and our sexuality, and we had fun, and that, I think, was enough. The whole point was to see if we could stage an event where a handsome boy with a lovely penis could be made irresistible, and whether we could develop a set of criteria that mean anything beyond the whimsical. The theory is that the average girl put on the stage with the winner of our contest would have his penis inside her mouth within minutes. Unfortunately there's no forum or reality TV show that would allow us to take the experiment further and see whether we could find a penis so irresistible that ANY liberally-minded girl taken at random would have it in her mouth on impulse, given the ambient environment. Our experiment presumed that the "Best Penis" would imply an eagerness to assure the girl an orgasm too. That worked, of course, because of the sexy atmosphere during the contest; I don't mean to pretend that girls are so easily aroused, and that the mere sight of that Best Penis would have led any girl to want to embrace it, or to want sex. Some might even have laughed at it. But there is the matter of self-selection in such things: nobody, for example, would ever have come to our nude dances who didn't want to become aroused and excited, and have the opportunity of seeing and experiencing romance and sex. It's under those circumstances that a sexy demeanor and a Best Penis become irresistible. As it happens, I don't have a lot of sex stories from college because I really did give my studies first priority. But this has been one of them, and it gives me cause to smile when I think back on it. (I heard that this event, or a reference to it, appeared in somebody's blog somewhere on the Net, posted, I suppose, by someone from my college. Unfortunately it's impossible to find it amidst all the porn sites and the snake oil sales pitches, or I'd have included a link. Sorry.) Love, Carol -- Pursuant to the Berne Convention, this work is copyright with all rights reserved by its author unless explicitly indicated. +---------------------------------------------------------------------------+ | alt.sex.stories.moderated ------ send stories to: | | FAQ: Moderators: | +---------------------------------------------------------------------------+ |ASSM Archive at Hosted by | |Discuss this story and others in alt.sex.stories.d; look for subject {ASSD}| +---------------------------------------------------------------------------+