Message-ID: <27940asstr$977152202@assm.asstr-mirror.org> Return-Path: X-Posting-Agent: Hamster/1.3.19.0 From: Celeste Reply-To: celeste801@aol.com X-Original-Message-ID: <52or3tkolj0fmlve6m6upq45gpdopp05kd@4ax.com> MIME-Version: 1.0 Content-Type: text/plain; charset=us-ascii Content-Transfer-Encoding: 7bit Cache-Post-Path: news.zipcon.net!unknown@cat5.zipcon.net X-Cache: nntpcache 2.4.0b5 (see http://www.nntpcache.org/) X-Original-Path: news.zipcon.net Subject: {ASSM} {REVIEW} Celestial Reviews 379 -- Dec 17, 2000 Date: Mon, 18 Dec 2000 10:10:02 -0500 Path: assm.asstr-mirror.org!not-for-mail X-Is-Review: yes Approved: Newsgroups: alt.sex.stories.moderated,alt.sex.stories,alt.sex.stories.d Followup-To: alt.sex.stories.d X-Archived-At: X-Moderator-Contact: ASSTR ASSM moderation X-Story-Submission: X-Moderator-ID: dennyw, RuiJorge Celestial Reviews 379 -- Dec 17, 2000 Note: There has been some discussion on a.s.s.d. of "The Bandit" by Metlay. I am reposting the guest review written by Piper in January 1998. Piper preferred to write under one name and review under another. He no longer does either. It's an insightful review of an excellent story. Second note: Here are the entries so far for the Celestial Christmas Story Contest: "Lucky Santa" by Sven the Elder http://assm.asstr-mirror.org/Year2000/27848 "A Neighbor's Gift" by Redman http://www.asstr-mirror.org/files/Authors/Redman/A_Neighbor's_Gift.txt "Black Silk Stockings" by Tiramisu http://assm.asstr-mirror.org/Year2000/27802 "Mike's Present" by EZ Riter http://assm.asstr-mirror.org/Year2000/27806 "Christmas Creampie" by Creampie Eater http://assm.asstr-mirror.org/Year2000/27793 "Bernoulli's Christmas" by Chuck Waggin http://assm.asstr-mirror.org/Year2000/27893 http://assm.asstr-mirror.org/Year2000/27906 If you have time to send me comments about any of these stories or to post discussion in a.s.s.d., I would appreciate hearing from you. There are three of these stories that I really like. In addition, if there are any other entries, please send them to me by the winter solstice, which occurs somewhere in the early morning of December 21. Third note: I originally said I would repost ALL my reviews of Christmas stories. I have decided that's an impossible task. Instead, I'll repost the reviews of what I think are the TOP 25 Christmas stories I have ever reviewed, plus all the current Christmas stories I can find that are not sheer drivel. At the present time, my "TOP 25" will include these 19 stories: 1. "Stocking Filler" by Bronwen http://www.hootisland.com/bronwen/xmas.htm 2. "For Now" by Uther Pendragon http://www.asstr-mirror.org/files/Authors/Uther_Pendragon/www/brennan/now.txt 3. "Forget All That" by Uther Pendragon http://www.asstr-mirror.org/files/Authors/Uther_Pendragon/www/brennan/fat_a.txt http://www.asstr-mirror.org/files/Authors/Uther_Pendragon/www/brennan/fat_b.txt http://www.asstr-mirror.org/files/Authors/Uther_Pendragon/www/brennan/fat_c.txt 4. "The Night Before Christmas" by M1KE HUNT http://baird.pair.com/mrm1ke/christmas.htm 5. "Here Cums Santa" by SueNH http://www.asstr-mirror.org/files/Authors/BitBard/www/forray/sue/santa.html 6. "Sue Saves Christmas" Paul LeComte 7. "Wrapped Attention" by Uther Pendragon http://www.asstr-mirror.org/files/Authors/Uther_Pendragon/www/story/wrapped.txt 8. "Santa's Cumming" by Kansica http://www.asstr-mirror.org/files/Collections/Old_Joe 's_Collection/Romance/Santa's%20Cum ming%201%20by% http://www.asstr-mirror.org/files/Collections/Old_Joe 's_Collection/Romance/Santa's%20Cum ming%202.txt http://www.asstr-mirror.org/files/Collections/Old_Joe 's_Collection/Romance/Santa's%20Cum ming%203.txt http://www.asstr-mirror.org/files/Collections/Old_Joe 's_Collection/Romance/Santa's%20Cum ming%204.txt 9. "Snowed In" by Dulcinea http://www.asstr-mirror.org/files/Authors/BitBard/www/forray/dulcinea/snow1.html 10. "Christmas Break" by Mat Twassel http://members.aol.com/Mmtwassel/xmas.txt 11. "Solstice Present" by Michael Snider http://www.asstr-mirror.org/files/Collections/Old_Joe%27s_Collection/Bondage/needwork /Solstice%20Present.txt 12. "Snow Flake" by DG http://baird.pair.com/dg/snow.htm 13. "Another Christmas Carol" by James Martin http://assm.asstr-mirror.org/Year1997/6348.txt 14. "Christmas Tale" by Frank Ashby http://www.asstr-mirror.org/files/Collections/Old_Joe%27s_Collection/Wifeslut/Christm as%20Tale%20-%20Frank%27s%20story.txt 15. "A Christmas Pony" by Grr Raoul Leash http://www.asstr-mirror.org/files/Collections/nifty/gay/sf-fantasy/christmas-pony 16. "Christmas with the Andersons" by James Boswell http://assm.asstr-mirror.org/Year1997/6080.txt 17. "Christmas Presents" by Ruth White http://www.asstr-mirror.org/files/Collections/Old_Joe%27s_Collection/TG/ChristmasPres ents.txt 18. "Oh, Christmas Tree" by Dulcinea http://www.asstr-mirror.org/files/Authors/BitBard/www/forray/dulcinea/christmas.html 19. "Adult Christmas" by Abby If you know the links to any of the unlinked stories in my list or any stories that you think I am missing, please let me know. I am definitely willing to make adjustments to my list. THIS WEEK'S JOKE: I know this isn't new, but some of you readers are: 1. The clitoris is a type of flower. True or False 2. A pubic hair is a wild rabbit. True or False 3. Spread Eagle is an extinct bird. True or False 4. Vagina is a medical term used to describe a Heart Attack. True or False 5. A menstrual cycle has three wheels. True or False 6. A G-string is part of a fiddle. True or False 7. Semen is a term for sailors. True or False 8. Anus is a Latin term for yearly. True or False 9. Testicles are found on an Octopus. True or False 10. Asphalt describes rectal problems. True or False 11. KOTEX is a radio station in Cincinnati. True or False 12. Masturbate is used to catch large fish. True or False 13. Coitus is a musical instrument. True or False 14. Fetus is a character on Gunsmoke. True or False 15. An umbilical chord is part of a parachute. True or False 16. A condom is a large apartment complex. True or False 17. An orgasm is a person who accompanies a church choir. True or False 18. A diaphragm is a drawing in geometry. True or False 19. A dildo is a variety of sweet pickle. True or False 20. An erection is when Japanese people vote. True or False 21. A lesbian is a person from the Middle East. True or False 22. Sodomy is a special land of fast growing grass. True or False 23. Pornography is the business of making records. True or False 24. Genitals are people of non-Jewish origin. True or False 25. Douche is the French word for "twelve". True or False ===================== Celestial Reviews Index: ===================== "Initiation" by Jennifer Doalfer (emerging sexuality) 9, 8, 8 http://www.asstr-mirror.org/files/Authors/doalfer/www/Initiation.htm "Welcome to Miami" by John A (romance) 10, 10, 10 http://www.asstr-mirror.org/files/Authors/JohnA/www/Miami.htm "The Time of Her Life" by Vickie Morgan (Halloween romance) 10, 10, 10 http://members.tripod.com/VickieMorgan/timelifefinal.htm "The Way Only Teenagers Can" by Thursday (emerging adolescence) 9, 10, 10 http://assm.asstr-mirror.org/Year2000/27639 "The Reunion of Paul and Ellen" by Paris Waterman (making up by making out) 10, 9, 9 "A First Posting" by The Sexton (masturbation) 10, 9, 9 http://assm.asstr-mirror.org/Year2000/27745 "The Price" by Ann Douglas (teen lesbian sex) 10, 8, 8 http://www.asstr-mirror.org/files/Authors/Ann_Douglas/www/price.htm ===================== Guest Reviews: ===================== "The Last Two Days" by Kellis (needful sex) 6/10 http://assm.asstr-mirror.org/Year2000/27637 ===================== Reposted Reviews: ===================== * "The Bandit" by Metlay http://assm.asstr-mirror.org/Year2000/22134 ===================== Here are the Reviews: ===================== "Initiation" by Jennifer Doalfer (doalfer@hotmail.com). http://www.asstr-mirror.org/files/Authors/doalfer/www/Initiation.htm The author claims that the incidents in this story are essentially true --they are recollections from her adolescent diary, embellished only enough to make them into a readable story. I don't know whether that assertion is true, but the story does read very much like a diary. Basically, Jenny is a Danish girl who wants to get laid, but she doesn't want to get the reputation of being a tramp. So she dances and flirts with Jorgen one night, and she plans to go all the way the next night. Danes apparently don't play baseball, and so I'm not familiar with their sex-related equivalent is to "getting to first base.". Let's just say that by the early part of the second evening Jorgen had reached midfield without an offsides call. However, Jenny yellow cards the rest of the guys in the disco and takes Jorgen to the penalty box -- actually a suspension walking bridge, where she feels the earth move. However, they stop without a shot on goal. The soccer metaphor is appropriate. We have several scoreless games. The preceding paragraph has brought me to an insight about the differences between Americans and Europeans. American men don't really like soccer {European football}. This is partly because they suck at it, but also because soccer has so many scoreless games. Americans refer to a tie game as being "like kissing your sister." They verbalize this metaphor with disparagement, even though many of the sisters would be well worth kissing. Now, here's my insight. The basic difference between Europeans and Americans is that Europeans are much more eager to have sex with their sisters than are Americans. Indeed, if you watch the British Parliament in action, it's easy to see some obvious effects of inbreeding, which is at least remotely linkable to the kissing of sisters. In other words, I think maybe Europeans are more into kissing their sisters, and hence they like soccer, while American men enjoy the more frequent scoring of baseball, which also has more breaks, during which they can ingest vast quantities of beer. To my utter dismay, Jenny displayed aureolas on the upper part of her body. She attempted to cover them with 12 square inches of bikini material, but that amount of camouflage was insufficient. Those are actually areolas. So Jenny goes swimming in her skimpy bikini. Now, that's another way Europeans differ from Americans. Apparently European women go swimming in scanty, skin-clinging, lust-evoking bikinis. American women would never do this. They may go to the beach clad thusly, but they never enter the water. Mostly, they just wear these clothes when they go to the supermarket or when they pose for swimsuit issues of sports magazines. Indeed, in parts of the United States a woman can actually be arrested for going swimming clad in what Jenny was wearing in this story. Of course, the cops just lock you up long enough to have sex with you, but that's still a lot different from Europe. Anyway, Jenny and Jorgen fuck in a crater that's sort of like a nest on a dune near the beach. It's good for him, but non-orgasmic for her -- sort of like a 1-1 tie in soccer, I suppose, or maybe like kissing one's brother. When I reached the end of Chapter 4, I ran out of reading material. "Is that all there is?" I thought. I realized I had the basis of a nice little song there, but I was still frustrated. When people post stories in parts, they really should say how many parts or chapters there are. Otherwise, it's like kissing one's grandmother. Ratings for "Initiation" Athena (technical quality): 9 Venus (plot & character): 8 Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 8 "Welcome to Miami" by John A (John3365A@aol.com). http://www.asstr-mirror.org/files/Authors/JohnA/www/Miami.htm As you may know, I have begun the custom of reviewing in each issue the story that has been the longest in my in-basket. My thinking is that I go through this in-basket quite often and throw out old stories that I won't have time to review, and so any story that remains in that virtual pile long enough must be a really good story. One flaw that I found in this process is that sometimes the stories I pull out of the in-basket are stories I have already read. Last week I found a story for which I had already written the review and had just forgotten to move the story into deep storage. No problem. I recognized the story and just skipped it. With the present story I ran into a different problem: a guest reviewer had reviewed the story, and I must have been impressed by the review and put it on my back burner for personal reading. Anyway, I read this story "by mistake," and it was a very fortunate mistake. I have read several stories by this author, and this has instantly become my favorite. A recently divorced man goes to Miami for a football game. As is often the case, the person who is almost deliberately trying to avoid falling in love lets down his guard, acts like his real self, and finds the love of his life. The fact that he also happens to be an author of erotic stories doesn't disturb their romance either. The story is romantic with a healthy dose of realism -- for example, the narrator is aware that he could be the victim of post-divorce horniness syndrome. The style is light and lively and the sex is hot and -- well, sexy. The story is full of interesting surprises -- including anal sex sans degradation. The author uses one literary technique I want to emphasize. The narrator refers to Kelly's "wholesome seductiveness." That's a genuine oxymoron. Seductiveness is by its nature not wholesome, and the contrary juxtaposition of the two words makes a really nice point about this character: she was simultaneously seductive and wholesome. That sounds impossible, but it's not. The same thing can be said of other oxymorons, such as making haste slowly or wasteful efficiency. The "oxymorons" that are usually cited as examples of this technique are not oxymorons at all. People who call them oxymorons are making a joke. "Military intelligence," for example, is not a true oxymoron: the person who says it's an oxymoron is simply trying to make a sarcastic point that all military people are stupid. Likewise, a "smart blonde" is not an oxymoron. On the other hand, "brilliant stupidity" would be an oxymoron, as would "stupid brilliance," if the speaker wanted to make the point that is inherent in the apparent contradiction. I know nobody will listen, but oxymorons are worth using correctly. A side benefit this duplicate review is that I proved to myself that BillyG gives good recommendations. I read his review after I wrote my own, and we saw much the same thing in this story. I'll repost his review below. Ratings for "Welcome to Miami" Athena (technical quality): 10 Venus (plot & character): 10 Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 10 "The Time of Her Life" by Vickie Morgan (artemis55@hotmail.com). http://members.tripod.com/VickieMorgan/timelifefinal.htm This is a Halloween story that the author submitted too late for Halloween. However, it's too creative to let it lie fallow until next year. The basic idea is that Megan exists in real life only twice every four years. That would be February 29 plus October 29 of leap years. Bill falls in love with Megan, and the dilemma focuses on how they can fulfill their love across the barriers of time and visibility. The author adds all kinds of all-the-wall details to enrich the plot. I take pride in being able to predict the ending of almost all sex stories. In this case, I figured that between Feb 29 and Oct 31 of 1996 Bill would work his ass off in the research libraries and develop a cure that would enable Megan to live happily ever after with him. Failing that, plan B would entail Bill going into oblivion with Megan. I was wrong on both counts. I admire that in a story. The actual resolution of the plot might be considered by all but a sore loser to be even better than the one I had envisioned. One distraction that I encountered was the frequent reference to the Washington Monument, which is clearly not the huge phallic symbol found in the District of Columbia on the continent of North America. Perhaps someone who reads this review will tell us something about the "other" Washington Monument, which seems to be have been built over on the other side of the Pond as a sort of symbol of good sportsmanship. Ratings for "The Time of Her Life" Athena (technical quality): 10 Venus (plot & character): 10 Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 10 "The Way Only Teenagers Can" by Thursday (Thursday@altavista.net) http://assm.asstr-mirror.org/Year2000/27639 This story is an embellished teenage memory. It describes things the way we adults all wish we could have done it -- the way our misguided memories really do remember what we never really did. Embellishment is good. But no teenage boy has ever endured what the teenage girl did to the teenage boy in this story. At least not on the first shot of the night. They can't last that long. Middle aged men subjected to the wiles of a sexy wench are a different matter. It's all a matter of how much help the rocket needs in order to fire. Nevertheless, this is still a good story of adolescent achievement. Little kids HAVE to believe in Santa Claus, and bigger kids HAVE to believe that they could once fuck endlessly. I might add that I have done most of what happens in this story -- except for the finger-in-the-nose-in-the-beer routine -- just not as an unmarried person or as a teenager, but rather as a careful and discreet matron who wanted to act out some fantasies without humiliating my family. That can be fun too! Ratings for "The Way Only Teenagers Can" Athena (technical quality): 9 Venus (plot & character): 9.5 Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 10 "The Reunion of Paul and Ellen" by Paris Waterman (the_panda@hotmail.com). Although they truly love each other, Paul and Ellen have been struggling in their marriage. In this story they engage in a marathon sex session to get their act back together. If more people sat down -- er, laid down or bent over -- and engaged in this sort of therapy, we'd have a lot fewer broken marriages in the world. My favorite pun in the whole story -- which I think is accidental -- is Ellen's question: "Are you sure nobody's going to come back here tonight?" Her concern is that somebody might find them copulating in the abandoned back room. However, when she asks the question, Paul is getting ready to ream out her asshole. Later, when Ellen gets "a fucking cramp," I think that pun is intentional. Again -- my health caution. You really do have to be a little careful about anal sex. Germs from the front just don't have enemies in the back, and so you can get a nasty infection if you are not careful. In addition, KY is superior to Vaseline or to face cream, because of its water-based chemistry. You can actually get skin burns -- and learn to hate a pleasant activity --by doing anal sex wrong. Ratings for "The Reunion of Paul and Ellen" Athena (technical quality): 10 Venus (plot & character): 9 Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 9 "A First Posting" by The Sexton (the_sexton@my-deja.com). http://assm.asstr-mirror.org/Year2000/27745 Even if a story is the first one you've ever posted, I think you should give it a title other than "A First Posting." I'd even settle for "A First Posting" as a subtitle, but the title ought to tell the potential reader something informative or creative about the story. This is a story about a man masturbating to the mental picture of his ideal woman. It's really very good. The author blends the real and the imagined together into a really nice mixture of sensations and emotions. At the end, we're still not sure exactly what happened; but that's a nice touch. I hope Ratings for "A First Posting" Athena (technical quality): 10 Venus (plot & character): 9 Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 9 "The Price" by Ann Douglas (ann_douglas@hotmail.com). A popular but shallow heterosexual girl needs to get a term paper done for her, but her boyfriend has failed her. Therefore, she has to turn to the hottest lesbian in the class, who has some fun with her. This is immoral. Kids fucking their brains out is one thing. Cheating on term papers is another. We have to draw the line somewhere. Plagiarizing on term papers is almost as plagiarizing stories for this newsgroup. God appoints a special angel (called a muse) who watches out for such offenses, and punishes plagiarism with seven years of bad sex for each offense. Believe me, you don't want to go there. Besides, if students just do what they're supposed to do (without cheating), they will profit greatly from doing their own work and will partake of their fair share goods of society. Cheating is only permissible in our society when it is done by lawyers, politicians, and lovers whose partners are assholes or who grant permission and are permitted to watch. This is not one of Ann's best stories. {Incidentally, Ann's two worse stories are "Wilma and Betty" and "A Visit to Grandmother's House." These would actually be good stories for some authors, but I have reviewed something like 59 stories by this author that I think are better than these two.} Nevertheless, Ann supplies us with healthy doses of FF sexual activity in interesting environments. I just thought the plot was a little too easy. Ratings for "The Price" Athena (technical quality): 10 Venus (plot & character): 8 Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 8 ===================== Guest Reviews: ===================== {Occasionally I send stories out for guest reviews, even when the author has not specifically asked me to do so. I do this because I feel that any publicity is better than none, and because I think my readers enjoy hearing about the stories. If a reviewer writes what I think is a bad review, I just omit it. Sometimes reviewers give more negative emphases than I would give myself. I think these are still useful, and I hope these reviews are received in the constructive spirit in which I have solicited them. If any of you have sent me reviews that I have failed to post, you might want to get in touch with me to see if I have lost them. I really appreciate the help of my guest reviewers.} "The Last Two Days" by Kellis (kellis@dhp.com). Guest review by Jack Beattie. Hip dialogue and little passion don't make for a good story as far as I'm concerned and this story has both. Despite an interesting concept, I was simply not turned on by this story. This is the story of a woman who during two days before (during?) her menstrual cycle becomes so horny that she requires servicing by a team of men hired, it turns out, by her husband. The rest of the time, she is a meek and mild housewife with normal desires. I'm sorry but this just doesn't make it for me. The sex seems contrived and the dialogue during sex is witty and full of double entendres. It just doesn't seem real. Consider: during a bout in the shower, the woman urges her two lovers on and they respond with, "Hi ho Silver!" and "Giddem up, Scout." Really. To compound the problem, our woman has a sort of flashback wherein she attempts to explain how she became this way. Apparently, as a teen, she would take on legions of boys and men each day, as many as forty, fifty and more in a three hour period between the end of school and the arrival home from work of her mother. This has led to a mild schizophrenia for the woman which surfaces in the last two days. Technically, the story has few errors in grammar, spelling and syntax; however, I'd rather read a story full of errors but which I could believe and which included some passion. Rating: 6/10 ===================== Reposted Reviews: ===================== * "The Bandit" by Metlay (posted by Bookman Archives). Guest review by Piper In Western civilized cultures, there is a place separate from the so-called real world; a place where young and old meet, where learning from books and learning of life mix, where ideas and ideals are sometimes more important than the people who hold them. We call these places universities. The Bandit is a student in a place called Arcadia. This story covers the last year and a half or so of his academic life. We don't learn much about his studying or courses, though of course such things must take place (there's only a few minor mentions of these matters). Instead, we read about him, his friends and acquaintances, their shifting relationships, and the slow unveiling of their inner personalities. The Bandit is an intelligent young man with a libido that won't quit (like many young men), but with a problem -- an inner voice that tells him about right and wrong, and why he shouldn't do certain things that seem like good ideas at the time. Think of Hawkeye from TV's _Mash_, with less joking, but with a fair flair for music, especially bass guitar. Women and sex do not occupy his every waking moment. He's got a real life. Some of the other folks involved are: Zero, the skinny, easygoing guy with the oversized shlong, who makes the girls crazy with lust; Mary Magdalene, the slightly oversized sexpot with a killer kiss and an absolutely over-the-top thing for The Rainbow Wizard, a cancer survivor who turned a mystic bent, all to hide his mind games and manipulations; Diva, another somewhat oversexed lady looking for a not-totally-meaningful relationship; Twink, who is honest, forthright, wears her heart on her sleeve, but is so painfully naive it hurts, and who eventually learns to share her boyfriend with one girl, her fiance with another girl, and herself with yet another girl (all at the same time!); Conan, the musclebound nice guy who hasn't got a clue as to what he's really all about. And there's still Starch, Lanky, Flower, Livewire ... While I read the story, I slowly came to the realization that all of the protagonists were distilled essences of character types. What made them live for me were the real situations and their believable reactions. I could see people I know doing the same things, but maybe not for the same reasons. Like an onion (a very over-used metaphor, I know), there is layer upon layer of misdirection and misunderstanding. Look below the surface in this story. It won't grip you by the gonads, despite the fair sprinkling of sex, but it will, eventually, take over your mind, infesting you with thoughts about the characters themselves. Whoever the author is, he (or she) wrote a very intelligent, imaginative slice of life. (My personal favorite character is Twink, but I don't think she'd settle for me. I'm probably a bit too much of the one-man-one-woman kind of guy for her.) This is another long (275k) story. Ratings for "The Bandit" Technical merit 10 Plot and character 10 Appeal to reviewer 10 * "Welcome to Miami" by John A (John3365a@aol.com). Guest Review by BillyG (hayden@mindless.com) Of the intellectual and emotional attractions that tug at me when I read alt.sex.stories, the strongest are those that say, I know you - - you're just like me. To the degree that such identification nudges us, we may be pulled into a story's vortex or simply bumped right back out, the literary equivalent of tissue rejection. It's the nature of many of the so-called erotic tales posted here that they're so superficial and fantasy-based that they glance off, hardly making a mental ripple. I'm delighted to say that "Welcome to Miami" is not of that genre. Mike is a very human guy, a writer who is recovering from a failed marriage and isn't even considering another relationship. He's spending time with his buddies who've come to Miami to see a football game. An attractive stranger in a bar, a spilled drink and before you know it, quite unbidden, Mike meets Kelly. The connection and the energy that develops catches both them by surprise. Kelly's willing to take a chance, though she's grounded sufficiently to protect her heart. Mike is emotionally tossed about by the suddenness and intensity of the sexual squall. Unprepared and uncertain, he does the only thing he knows -- retreats. Still, the connection would appear to be more rooted than Mike appreciates and he slowly moves away from the safety of his isolation and becomes willing to take a chance with love once again. The story and the people are very attractive and more, quite believable. I suspect that many of us could be Mike or Kelly in the drama of our own lives. Read it. Do. It's sweet and sexy and achingly poignant. Ratings for "Welcome to Miami Athena (technical quality): 10 (despite a few minor glitches) Venus (plot & character): 10 BillyG (appeal to reviewer):10 CELESTIAL GRAMMAR: BOTH ... AND The proper second half to BOTH is AND. There is a tendency for writers in recent years to use AS WELL AS for the second half of the statement. "I made love to BOTH Julie and her sister last night." NOT "I made love to BOTH Julie AS WELL AS her sister last night." It would be acceptable to say, "I made love to Julie, AS WELL AS her sister, last night. {Whether commas would surround the phrase would depend on whether the phrase is considered restrictive or not. In other words, the insertion or deletion of commas would change the meaning slightly.} -- Pursuant to the Berne Convention, this work is copyright with all rights reserved by its author unless explicitly indicated. +---------------------------------------------------------------------------+ | alt.sex.stories.moderated ----- send stories to: | | FAQ: Moderator: | +---------------------------------------------------------------------------+ |Archive: Hosted by Alt.Sex.Stories Text Repository | |, an entity supported entirely by donations. | +---------------------------------------------------------------------------+