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Subject: {ASSM} {REVIEW} The Annex Reviews, 6/30/00
Date: Sat, 1 Jul 2000 17:10:32 -0400
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The Annex Reviews, 6/30/00
by Lady Cyrrh (ladycyrrh@aol.com)
Website: http://members.aol.com/ladycyrrh OR
http://home.aol.com/ladycyrrh
The stories:
For Bearing, Part 1 (Uther Pendragon): M/F, preg
Batgirl vs. The Joker (S. Sneakley): M/F, bond, superhero
The Eternal Youth (Drow Elf): M/b, fantasy, first, spank
Living Rich [a Tiffany story] (Phil Phantom): M/F, oral, prostitution,
incest, pedo
Website Review: Shameless Tales from the Realm of Gazumania
For Bearing [A]
Where posted: ASSM
When posted: 6/12/00
Author: Uther Pendragon
Address: anon584c@nyx.net
Website: http://www.nyx.net/~anon584c/
I haven't read any Uther Pendragon stories in a while, so I'd thought I'd
read this. A pregnant woman and her husband have a conversation late
one night in bed. The story is told entirely in dialogue, leaving you to
guess at the meanings of exchanges like "No problem. You actually
enjoyed that?" "Sure. I won't lie, I prefer being in you. But that will
happen. I waited years for you, once. I can wait months....Indeed, I
should have more patience these days.... It's funny, though" which I
first took to mean they were having anal sex, until a few lines later,
when I discover it's a handjob. Good thing, too, as the baby is playing
"soccer" with her bladder!
I was never and will probably never be pregnant, but this story seemed
true to life, and is worth reading several times, just to "get" all the coy
exchanges between the two.
Batgirl vs. The Joker - The Safest Sex of All [A]
Where posted: ASS, ASSM
When posted: 6/28/00
Author: S. Sneakley
Address: sneakly@SPAMyahoo.comKILLER
S. Sneakley has written an excellent series about the adventures of
Batgirl that I really enjoyed (Batgirl vs. The Crime School for Girls, the
6/11/97 Reviews) but quit writing for a few years. Now he's back with a
new Batgirl series, and this time she's up against The Joker and his
stripper-for-hire girlfriend, Bubbles. (I guess Harley Quinn is in the
slammer.)
Based more on the 60s TV show than the comic, the story was an
enjoyable romp with a sly sense of humor. Batman and Chief O'Hara are
boobs, and Robin is a drunk; only Batgirl has any crime-fighting sense.
The story begins when Bubbles the stripper, whose costume consists of
multicolored balloons -- some filled with knockout gas -- steals some
bonds from a bank president. Batgirl tracks her down to the Joker's
hideout at The Lucky Latex Novelty Shop, where various bondage perils
await her. First she's constricted inside a giant purple condom:
She would have had no time to react even if she had seen what was
coming. The Joker slapped a red and white bulls eye on the floor with
his hand. As soon as he did, a loud POW echoed through the room. The
purple circle that she was stepping across shot up in the and closed her
in a purple sheath of shiny latex:
_________________________________________________________
"Hoo hoo, the jokes on you Bat-babe! It s a full body condom! The safest
sex of all!" He was on his feet now, jumping and clapping his white
gloved hands. "This is better than I had hoped. I was starting to worry
that you were never going to catch on to such a wonderful ploy!"
Barbara was rolling around on the floor struggling in the tight
confines of the latex sheath. It had closed neatly around her neck and
was quickly getting tighter. It had formed a second skin over her body.
Her arms were pressed to her side and she was soon unable to move
them more than a few inches to either side. A warm, slimy coating on
the inside of the latex let her body glide around inside the condom as
she wriggled uselessly on the floor.
_______________________________________________________
After she escapes, there's another peril involving a carnival dunk tank,
The Joker's orgasm-inducing "joy buzzers", and a slide into a pool of
soap where she's alternately suffocated and stimulated.
In some places the story was darker than the author's previous works,
particularly when Batgirl nearly dies in that tank and escapes only by
blind luck -- it was less bondage-sexy and more snuff n' danger, and the
all-in-good-fun tone was absent. However, other parts of the story were
very amusing, such as the Joker's continuous fuck sessions with
Bubbles (he wears boxers adorned with purple hearts) and casual sadism
("Did you really kill her Jokey?" "As a matter of fact I did, while we
were fucking on a couch just like this.") If the Joker were ever to have
a sex life on-screen, he'd act just like this.
The Eternal Youth [A]
Where posted: ASSGM
When posted: 6/16/00
Author: Drow Elf
Poster: Le Critic!
Poster Address: compassionate@aol.com
There was a lengthy and interesting foreword to this story, which deals
with gay sex in the age of AIDS and the yearning for eternal youth in
the form of a young, good-looking, gay man with unlimited sexual
opportunities in front of him. The story was pretty good too, though not,
as the author says, written for "shallow thrill-seekers looking for plain,
simple smut."
Larson is a beleaguered, naive 18-year-old tavern-boy in an inn circa
1716. One day a strange merchant comes in who regards him "as a man
might look at a woman." The narrator's intuition is confirmed when he
spills some wine and the innkeeper orders him whipped on the buttocks
for it with a belt:
I heard the sound of the tavern keeper unbuckling his belt and then
snaking it of his pants. I took a deep breath and braced myself for the
first lick, tensing my buttocks. Then the merchant spoke up. "Hold
there, good man!" he said. The tavern keeper turned belligerently to
the merchant, who continued, "I fear that the lad may not taste the full
flavor of your belt if he wears those thick trousers that now protect his
bottom." I glared sideways at the merchant, who I now saw placing a
shilling by the tavern keeper. The tavern keeper grunted his assent,
pocketed the coin and said to me, "You heard the gentleman, Larson!
Down with your pants! Right this instant, boy!"
This leads to a pretty thorough spanking, after which the innkeeper
hires the narrator out to the merchant for the night. Alone in his room,
the merchant announces he's in the possession of the "elixer of Life"
and the narrator begs for a taste of it, after the sex of course.
This was a very well-written first-time story and it kept my attention
from beginning to end; if more has been written (unknown, since the
poster does not appear to be the author) it's worth keeping an eye out
for. My only complaint is that the elixer of Life was given too freely;
surely the narrator would have been required to do something more?
But this was a very good read.
Living Rich (a Tiffany story) [A]
Where posted: ASSM
When posted: 6/18/00
Author: Phil Phantom
Address: Phantom@Sonny.Net
Website: HTTP://PhilPhantom.Com
I was not thrilled with the last Phil Phantom/Tiffany I read, "Sacrificial
Lamb" (1/17/98 Reviews) because of its blatant racism and the forcible
impregnation of minors, but this one had an intriguing title so I'd
thought I'd give him, or her, another go. (I am still not sure of the
relationship between Phil Phantom and Tiffany, if they are a writing
team, two identities for the same author, alteregoes, or what.) In this
story, a young mother with three kids is forced to become a hooker in
order to support herself, as her husband has dumped her and refuses to
pay child support. The story didn't really have a plot; it was all about her
rationalization of her career choice and the effect it has on her kids,
and the author showed great skill in making it all seem eerily logical to
the intelligent, but downtrodden, narrator:
________________________________________________________
A mother does what she must, but I could have gone on welfare before
resorting to the oldest profession. My two biggest aversions are the outside
work place and the welfare system. One is alien and frightening; the other
is
demeaning and sucks. If you take those two options away from a woman who
has never had difficulty attracting men, then place her in a low-rent
environment where the men keep telling her she is sitting on a gold mine,
and she can see other miners hard at work mining gold...well, sooner or
later,
she will grab a pick and shovel.
____________________________________________________________
There. I can almost believe it...**almost**...
The narrator hooks for a while, and even her kids help out in a away.
(The johns enjoy humiliating the kids by making them watch the acts,
but the kids aren't actually disgusted, they see it as a practicality, and
their yucky faces are a sham.) Eventually the narrator marries one of
her clients, a wealthy man who continues to use her as a prostitute, and
who will eventually use her children as well (as "human fuck rags.")
But lo and behold, real love sets in, and all the white-trash hooking and
incest that came before is negated. The narrator and her husband have
18 happy years together and the kids go on to good marriages and well-
paying careers, leaving her to conclude: "Mothers do raise minds, and a
good whore can do that as well as anyone. We are sexual beings, and
children are young sexual beings. Knowledge of sex does no harm, but
neglect and distance does. You can't hold a child close enough or give a
child too much love and affection. I have no regrets, but I pitty the fools
who think they are protecting their children by shielding them from
the real world and sex, or moms who can't scream MOTHER FUCKER when
they stub a toe. DAMN just doesn't do it and won't make children laugh."
If you wanted to pick a bone with this story, you'd find lots of
tyrannosaurus-sized ones sticking out in clear view; chief among them
that prostitution is an abandoned woman's only career choice, and that
it does no lasting damage to either herself or her kids. But what the hell,
this is a total fantasy, and part of the enjoyment of reading it *was* how
skillfully the author took an outrageous conceit and tried to make it
seem realistic and wholesome while giving it the "Oprah" confessional
touch. Not bad at all. If this is a newer story than "Sacrificial Lamb" the
writer has improved a lot. Who knows, maybe there was a grain of truth
in it as well.
Website Review: Shameless Tales from the Realm of Gazumania
Address: http://pages.whowhere.com/arts/misia_and_nerva/
Part of: Madame Celena's Psychic Cyber Love Shack
Address:
http://pages.whowhere.com/arts/minette_and_celena/index.html
Owners: Minette and Celena
Reviewed: 6/27/00
NOTE: This site is part of a larger one, "Madame Celena's Psychic Cyber
Love Shack."
You'd think high fantasy would be fertile, oft-exploited ground for sex
stories, but this isn't the case. Oh, fantasy exists aplenty in the slash and
fanfic world, but it's always using someone else's creation and
characters -- Xena, Star Wars: TPhM, Highlander, etc. -- only rarely will
you find an original world, and rarer still will that world be based on
popular fantasy *literature* rather than spinoffs inspired by anime,
comics, or video games. But here, "two dear friends who happen to be a
bit on the wild side" have attempted just that, creating a highly
arousing read even as it gently spoofs those deluxe cheese-tray
paperbacks with teary-eyed horses and sternly gesturing, Cher-haired
sorceresses on the cover.
Artemisia and Nerva are the last two descendants of a race of female
magicians who require sex, and lots of it, to recharge their magical
powers. Most of the stories were, in fact, sex; unlike some other fantasy
eroticists (Anthony Pryor, Cobalt Jade, Elf Sternberg, Will Sanburn)
there wasn't much plot to speak of. But the background detailing of
their world and lovers was very amusing, and the writing was excellent.
Here Misia gets together with a new lover, a red-haired kilt-wearing
Celt:
_____________________________________________________________
She kissed his balls again, and took each one into her mouth, sucking lightly
and then washing them lovingly with her tongue, the way a cat would wash
her young. Forodian was breathing hard, and Misia was squirming with her
own desire. She could feel her clit pounding in a syncopated rhythm, and
desperately wanted him back inside her dripping cunt, but she also wanted to
make him cum all over her face and breasts. She stroked his hips, ass, and
legs
ass he played her tongue across the head of his twitching cock. He growled
and
whispered, "Suck it, please. Suck it again." Without hesitation, she did as
she
was asked and began to suck his cock hard and fast, all the way up and down,
dispensing with the teasing. Forodian moaned loudly, tensing as watched her
going down on him. He grabbed the back of her head, fucking her mouth and
growling out his pleasure. Misia pulled free of his grasp just in time to
release
his built-up stream of juices all over her tongue and breasts. She looked up
at
her lover as he watched himself pour his hot spunk all over her face in
stream
after blazing stream while she jacked his cock.When he was done, she tenderly
licked the last drops from cock, and coaxed him to sit down next to her. She
continued to kiss his softening cock and balls and thighs, then worked her
way back up to his mouth, where she kissed his mouth soundly.
______________________________________________________________
There are eight stories in this series, and I read the first five:
"Sorceress" "Forodian's Pleasure" "Back at Castle Clightumnearia" (I
loved that name, with its connotations of both "clit" and "tumescent")
"Half-Sick of Shadows" and "The Lavender Lake." I particularly enjoyed
"Half-Sick of Shadows" for its Medieval take on cybersex (using magic
mirrors and two enchanted giant's eyeballs as cybercams) and dildoes
(called magic "wands," of course, in different candy colors.) If I had any
crits to make about this series, it would be that it would be nice to see
more of a plot, but as sex was so good, and the stories brief, the lack
really didn't detract from the hour or two of enjoyment they gave me.
Designwise, the site functions like it is supposed to. The design is
average and there are no surprises. I've known of this site for at least
two years, and in those years, the design has not changed, nor do any
new Misia and Nerva stories appear to have been added, which is a
shame. Since the rest of the Love Shack is written by the same two
authors, it's probably worth a look too.
If you're into both high fantasy and porn, and like a touch of silliness
and romance in it, check this out.
Interface: B+/A-
Content: A
Will I visit again: Yes.
____________________________________
Comments to: ladycyrrh@aol.com
Website---> http://members.aol.com/ladycyrrh
--
Pursuant to the Berne Convention, this work is copyright with all rights
reserved by its author unless explicitly indicated.
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