Message-ID: <21812asstr$945202200@assm.asstr-mirror.org> From: Jimmy Hat Subject: {ASSM} Fuck the Year 2000 (MF) X-Original-Message-ID: MIME-Version: 1.0 Content-Type: TEXT/PLAIN; charset=US-ASCII Date: Tue, 14 Dec 1999 15:10:00 -0500 Path: assm.asstr-mirror.org!not-for-mail Approved: Newsgroups: alt.sex.stories.moderated,alt.sex.stories Followup-To: alt.sex.stories.d X-Archived-At: X-Moderator-Contact: ASSTR ASSM moderation X-Story-Submission: X-Moderator-ID: Vulpine, dennyw In case you follow "The Adventures of Maytag and Stanton", let me say now that this is not one of their escapades. It's a little ditty to help mark the millennium. This work contains graphic depictions of sex acts. Please do not continue if this makes you uncomfortable, or violates laws in your part of the world. This story is Copyright 1999 by Jimmy Hat (jimmy@jimmy-hat.com) ---------------------------------------------------------------------- FUCK THE YEAR 2000 by Jimmy Hat Debbie was having a sudden bout of anger. Her friends were either at exotic locations around the globe or exclusive spots there in Manhattan. She was spending New Year's Eve at work. It was bad enough being a cobol programmer in New York, watching as people ten years her junior get high paying jobs with internet firms. But to add a sloppy wet kiss of an insult to an exhausting year of Y2K compliance tests, lawyer's forms, and last minute bug fixes, she had to be on duty when the nines flipped over to zeros. Her boss sure as hell hadn't bothered to hang around the IT department for their big night. At least the firm threw a party for them. No champagne, of course; sparkling cider would have to do the trick. There was a small show earlier, complete with a stand-up comic, jugglers, and a "Baby New Year" skit that Debbie had to admit was funny. A midget played the Baby 2000, and he maliciously played with his toys, crashing model airplanes, using little green army men to quell riots, parodying all the expected y2k chaos. However, one funny sketch didn't make up for taking away Debbie's evening. Neither did the buffet in front of her. It was supposed to be from Dean and DeLuca's, but Debbie supposed she simply lost her appetite. She stood staring at the food. "Hey, Red," said a voice behind her, "You gonna try that salmon tartare or cook it with your heat vision?" Debbie hated being called "Red", but the joke was funny enough for her to let that slide. She turned to see who was behind her, but saw no one. "Down, here, Red! Admiring your legs." It was the midget from the show. He was still dressed in costume, and apparently, still obnoxious as well. But cantankerous company is what her midnight misery needed. She decided to introduce herself. "The name isn't Red," she said extending her hand. "It's Debbie. I see you've already met my legs." "Yeah, we see eye-to-knee on a lot of issues. And as long as we're on the topic of names, it's Frank. Not half-pint, little man, shorty-" "Point taken," Debbie interrupted. "So what are you doing still in costume?" "I just like diapers," Frank responded. "Makes me feel at ease." Debbie laughed. "Actually," Frank said, "It's a long story. I had a bunch of gigs tonight and it was easier just to stay in costume. I was supposed to be out of here by now, but my date canceled." "Oh, I'm sorry." "Yeah, all dressed up and no place to go, right?" Debbie looked at Frank, in black tennis shoes, a diaper, a banner that stretched over one shoulder and tied at the waist that read "2000" and a black top hat. "I'd say you were more undressed with no place to go." "Tell me about it," Frank said. "I'm getting a little cold in this get up." Debbie thought for a moment and then spoke. "I know a warmer room if you don't mind a little noise and cramped space." "Hot, loud, crowded?" Frank asked. "That sounds like a New Year's Eve party to me!" Debbie led the walk from the buffet along the halls, down one flight of stairs, and through a string of doors. She used her magnetic pass key at least three times. The last door led to a dark room filled with tiny green lights. A blast of warm air greeted them before Debbie turned on the overhead lights. "The computer room?" Frank uttered in disbelief. "I thought these places were supposed to be cool." "They are," Debbie said. "My reward for being ready months ahead of time with y2k bug fixing was an air conditioning failure this week. I've literally sweated this one out the last two days. We couldn't get it repaired, but the temperature is stable at around 81 degrees, and so far we haven't had any problems." "So far," Frank echoed. "Don't remind me," Debbie said. "So, is this more comfortable?" "It's nice and warm. Not what I had in mind for tonight, though." "You think I planned it this way?" Debbie asked. "No, but you're being paid, right?" "So are you," she pointed out. "Whatever," Frank said . "Are we supposed to be here?" "Not really, but no one's going to notice. The workstations are all upstairs." "Then how about we break another rule?" Frank suggested. He took off his hat, reached up into it and pulled out a pint of whiskey. "You do magic, too, huh?" Debbie asked. "Hardy har," Frank replied. "It isn't even mine. Old man 1999 handed it to me when my date stood me up." "A little going away present." "You got it," Frank said as he twisted off the lid. "I don't even like hard alcohol normally. I guess this has just been on my mind tonight." He took a swig. "You are a funny man, Frank." "Thank you, Debbie. You're not bad yourself." Frank passed her the bottle. They found the static free swivel chairs ordered especially for the room and sat down. They joked and passed the flask back and forth. Laughter helped soothe their throats after the whisky left its warm sting. Although Frank grew quite comfortable in the toasty confines, Debbie was getting a little warm. She took off her jacket and unbuttoned the top of her blouse. Arguably, that was the point of no return. A case could also be made that their choice was made when they left the buffet area together. But there was no doubt where the evening was going when a slightly inebriated red-headed programmer broached a certain subject. "You know, Frank," Debbie began. "I've always wondered about the anatomy of men like yourself." "You mean you know about my third nipple?" Frank asked in mock shame. "Forget it," Debbie said, chuckling. "No, that's ok. I mean, it's a natural thing to wonder. But what does it matter what I say? I could be lying. Hell, I'm probably the only guy you'll ever meet who could say it reaches to his knees that you would actually believe." Debbie laughed and sipped from the flask. "To tell you the truth," Frank continued, "I've always wondered about the anatomy of women like you." Debbie looked down her shirt and then back at Frank. "Just two as far as I can tell," she said. "I had already guessed that." "So what are you wondering about, then?" "It's just your hair," Frank said obliquely. "I mean, it's so red." Debbie only needed a split second to infer what Frank meant. He wasn't the only one who wondered. Debbie was convinced men went down on her just for the close view of her bright orange curls. All she had to do was leave the lights on to guarantee a thorough licking. "Why are men so obsessed with that?" she asked Frank. "I could ask you the same thing about your question," he replied. Tongue firmly in cheek, Debbie concentrated her eyes on Frank. She licked her lips and said, "I'll show you mine if you show me yours." Frank smiled and raised the whisky flask to toast her suggestion. Their chairs weren't far apart to begin with, but Debbie kicked off her heels and used her feet to pull them together anyway. She continued to grapple with her foot to hold the chairs together while hitching up her skirt. "Garter belt!" Frank exclaimed in surprise as Debbie pulled back the skirt over the tops of her stockings and revealed bare thighs. "If a girl can't wear her best stuff on New Year's Eve when can she wear it?" Debbie asked. "Maybe it was just wishful thinking," Frank replied. "No, I don't think so. If it were wishful thinking I would have worn the panties over the garters instead of under them. Easier to get them off that way." "I see," said Frank. "Can you," Debbie teased. "Right through the material." "No I can't see that yet," Frank clarified. "How about now?" Debbie asked as she pulled her underwear to one side. "Much better." Indeed, Frank could clearly see the shiny furry patch of hair next to her knuckles. The hair was light colored, but not golden. It was clearly orange, and closer to her slit, it was thicker and redder. "What do you think?" Debbie asked. "It looks very much as advertised," Frank said. Debbie relaxed her hand and let the black curtain fall back over the wonder it protected. Frank took that as his cue, and he stood up in his chair. He threw off the "2000" banner and unfastened the safety pin on his trunks, allowing them to fall to the chair below. Debbie cooed appreciatively. His member hung flaccid between his legs and was not large by absolute standards. But in comparison to his stature the organ loomed large and commanded her attention. "Not at all as advertised," she said. "It gets bigger, you know." "Does it really?" Debbie asked. "Yeah, all you have to do is--" Debbie already had her hand around his balls and the tip of his cock in her mouth. Soon she sucked on practically its full length. Frank took hold of the seat back to steady himself after the sudden motion of the chairs. He moved one arm back to brush some of Debbie's lush red hair away from her face. With a clear view he could watch her painted lips suck him to a full erection. Debbie took Frank's little ass in her hands as she slid her mouth along his cock. His cheeks were smooth and firm. The muscles that led from his buttocks were as hard as the cock in her mouth. "See," said Frank. "It got bigger." Debbie pulled away from Frank's dick, leaving it to bounce slightly in the air between them. "Looks that way," she said. "I hate to disappoint you, but I don't get any redder." "Are you sure? Maybe I should take a closer look." "Be my guest," Debbie responded. She sat back in her chair and unfastened the garters fro her stocking tops. As Frank slid down and pushed the chairs apart to make room for himself, Debbie slid the panties out from under them and kicked them away. She reattached the garters, though. Frank kissed at her thighs, relishing the smooth milky skin that stood out brightly from the dark hosiery. He slid his hands under the garters like they were ribbons around a gift. But there was no wrapping paper to keep him from the prize. He buried his nose in her soft orange curls. The colorful patch filled his field of view, and he could make out dark red flecks of stubble on the far sides of her panty line. "I think you're right about the red. It would seem--" "Oh, Frank, shut up and eat me," Debbie said, pushing his head down and forcing his open mouth onto her sex. His wet lips met her labia and formed a delicious little kiss. Humor was a great quality in a lover, Debbie thought, but sometimes strokes are better than jokes. Stroke he did, with his tongue at first, along the seam of her cunt, and then with his fingers inside her hot tunnel. He circled her clitoris with his tongue as he teased the first inch of her pussy with his tiny digits. Frank certainly was dedicated. He licked and fingered for what seemed to Debbie like the rest of 1999. The efforts paid handsomely, and Debbie shook in her seat, with one leg draped over an arm of the chair and another over Frank's back. He liked the smooth feeling of her stocking against his skin and the way it contrasted the sharp pain her nails left when she came and raked along his arms. Debbie fought for breath but wanted to feel his manhood inside her She wanted to feel his hips slap against her ass. She lifted herself with her hands on the chair arms, and turned around so her ass faced Frank at eye level. Frank found this position a challenge, but he enjoyed the view. He gave Debbie's pussy one long lick that ended when he kissed and nibbled on the cheek of her ass. The skin was pink where she had rubbed against the seat. He gave her a slap and saw the red marks his fingers left quickly fade back to white. "Hey, this part gets redder!" he exclaimed. "How about getting me to come again?" Debbie suggested. Frank climbed onto the char and into Debbie. His cock shot inside her sopping wet pussy. He took his time and made short gentle strokes inside her. He gave her ass another playful slap. He picked up his pace a bit, lost in the amazing sight of her back tapering to her waist before blossoming again into the full round curves of her ass. Debbie looked back at him and flashed a deliciously wicked grin. He watched her eyelids shut, her teeth bite into her lower lip. Around the base of his cock, he felt the walls of her cunt tighten on his shaft and almost yank on him. It was more than he could take. His spirit exited in a a sharp jolt of pleasure. Impossibly, Debbie tightened more around his prick and milked him for every last second of orgasm. He collapsed against her back. "Debbie, that was amazing," he mumbled. "Yeah," she said, smirking, wishing desperately for a smoke. "I finally got to do what I've been muttering all year long." END ---------------------------------------------------------------------- I hope you enjoyed that, and I'd love to hear your comments. Other stories can be found at http://www.jimmy-hat.com Copyright 1999 by Jimmy Hat (jimmy@jimmy-hat.com) Anyone wishing to charge fees for access to this material, through any media or publication, must receive the written permission of Jimmy Hat. -- If you enjoyed this work, take a moment to email the author. Your comments are their only payment. 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