Message-ID: <5240eli$9710291227@qz.little-neck.ny.us> X-Archived-At: From: dragonslayer@iname.com (Beowulf The Dragon Slayer) Subject: Repost: HitchFucker's Guide I - IX (con, sf, humor) Newsgroups: alt.sex.stories.moderated,alt.sex.stories Followup-To: alt.sex.stories.d Reply-To: dragonslayer@iname.com (Beowulf The Dragon Slayer) Mime-Version: 1.0 Content-Transfer-Encoding: 7bit Content-Type: text/plain; charset=us-ascii Path: qz!not-for-mail Organization: The Committee To Thwart Spam Approved: X-Moderator-Contact: Eli the Bearded X-Story-Submission: X-Original-Message-ID: <34574b39.78008688@news.ibm.net.il> Beowulf The Dragon Slayer. DragonSlayer@iname.com The bigger the smile, the sharper the knife. (ROA 48) -- ============================================================= DISCLAIMER: The following text contains graphical descriptions of sex acts performed between consenting adults. If you find this kind of description offensive please do not read on. COPYRIGHT NOTICE: Copyright 1997 (c) Beowulf The Dragon Slayer. This is a work of fiction based on the series _The Hitch Hiker's Guide to the Galaxy_ by Douglas Adams. This work may not be reproduce in whole or in part without the written consent of the author (excluding archiving on a free and publicly accessible library/BBS). The author can be reached via electronic mail: DragonSlayer@iname.com THEMES: See each chapter. The Hitch Fucker's Guide To The Galaxy by Beowulf The Dragon Slayer Copyright (c) 1997 *** Chapter I: Ford's Perfect (M/F, con, oral, cum, sf, humor) Bip... Bip... Bip... Ford Perfect woke up in a fright. He looked up and could see nothing. He looked left and could see nothing. Right - pitch black. He felt a breeze at his feet and then did the mistake of looking down. He saw yellow stripes cut the black velvet he felt around him. After two more seconds of bewilderment he noticed that the yellow stripes were getting larger. A nanosecond later Ford was panicking as he fell through the black night. In the light stripes below Trillian and Zaphod Bibelbrox were sitting at the Inter-Jurbo-Galactic-Bar drinking something most people would not like to drink. "Trillian baby, what do you say about a nightcap at my place?" "Forget it! I'm not going to that miserable planet again." "Yeah, right. I forget." He replied and bumped his left head on the counter rendering it unconscious. His right head ordered another drink while one of his arms slowly moved on Trillian's thigh. "So let's go to your place!" he stated and bumped his other head unconscious. Trillian looked nervously at her watch. "He should have been here by now" she thought and pulled a small instrument from her bag. It was a satellite map and the red dot on it was not moving. She did some calculations and stood up amazed. Zaphod woke up only to see her running out the door and into her spaceship. "Baby," he shouted after her, "I'll just wait here until you come back, right?" Ford gathered his senses quickly and calmed down. He was still falling down rather fast but loosing his senses would not do him any good right now, would it? Keeping his senses wouldn't help him much either but at least that was something new to do. He felt something grab him from behind but ignored it as it was extremely unlikely to happen. He blanked out. Trillian navigated the ship back into the spacedock of the Inter-Jurbo-Galactic-Bar and shut down the engines. She looked at Ford passed out on the floor and smiled. It's been a long time since she saw him. He looked rather good actually. Of course, he needed a shave and hopefully a shower but his overall state for a person who just dropped a few hundred kilometers was rather good. She tried to wake him up but in vain. Finally she decided a cold shower should get him back and took off his clothes leaving him only in his underpants. She dragged him to the shower and opened the water. While doing so she got a glimpse of his cock below his shorts. "Now I know why they call him 'Perfect'" she giggled to herself. She dragged him under the water and in a second Ford was on his feet. "What? Where? ... Trillian... Hey, How are you? Long time no see". He smiled, "What are you doing here?" "I just saved you from certain death. It seems the Gorols decided to let you out the fast way." She paused for a second looking at his now nearly transparent shorts. "Ah, yeah" he murmured looking at hear firm tits, "Gorols, those red fuckers, I told them I'm in a hurry to get here but I didn't think they'll take me literally." Trillian stepped back a little. Ford set the water and took off his shorts. "You look great, you know?" he said. "Yes," Trillian replied with a wink. "I'll be outside." She left the bathroom and went into the small bedroom. A few minutes later Ford came out of the shower wearing a towel round his waist. Trillian was sitting on the edge of the bed reading some kind of a magazine. Ford looked at her for a couple of seconds admiring her figure and eventually said "Hey, what's up?" "Oh, nothing in particular" she looked at the big cock under the towel. "Can I see that?" she added looking directly at his crouch. "Well..." Ford started but Trillian was already walking towards him. She grabbed the towel and pulled it off. His long cock sprang out into full view. "Nice..." She said while taking her shirt off. she got down on the floor and started slowly caressing his giant stick. Ford was stunned, It was a long time since he saw Trillian but he didn't think she changed that much. She took his cock in her mouth. Only the tip at first, slowly licking it as she was using her other hand to massage his balls. "Trill..." He started saying but gave up. The feeling of her tongue licking the tip of his cock was so good he was speechless. She continued to slowly suck on him while pinching her nipples lightly. He moved her alittle and sat himself on the bad. She stayed on the floor and started to titfuck him, pressing her tits over his cock and moving forward and backwards. She was so hot she could not take it any longer. She got up from the floor and lay herself on the bad, still in her skirt and high-heals. "Eat me" she moaned and Ford did not had much choice. Putting his hand on her crouch he slowly pressed her cunt while using his other hand to take of her shoes. He then pulled up her skirt and stuck a finger right into her warm wet cunt. Using his other hand he got a pillow and put it under her ass. He then started licking her clit slowly while his hands were massaging her round ass. He continued licking her clit and now and then putting a finger or two inside her warm pussy. Eventually he turned her over and lifted her ass towards him. he continued caressing her cunt while getting up from behind her and sticking his cock in her pussy from behind. They fucked each other like that while Ford kept massaging Trillian's clit. It was not long before Trillian came with a load cry. Ford was ready to come too but Trillian pulled off. "I have to rest for a second honey" she said and turned on her back. Ford lay down besides her, his prick still reaching for the sky. The sight of this alone was enough to turn Trillian on again and she started jerking him off slowly. Ford could not take it anymore, he wanted his cock in her - wherever. "Please..." He moaned, and needn't say more. Trillian leaned forward and started deep- throating him, sucking the hell out of him. She felt him about to come and quickly pulled his cock out of her mouth and started rubbing her tits over it. The feeling of an about-to-come cock on her tits was so good she almost came again just from thinking about it. Ford started to massage her clit again while she was giving him what would very probably have been the best titfuck of his life. Finally he could not take it anymore. "I'm coming" he nearly shouted and sprayed his load all over Trillian's face and tits. That was too much for Trillian that came instantly while rubbing his cum all over her tits. They both collapsed on the bed exhausted from all the effort. (considering the fact that Ford was just thrown out of a spaceship and Trillian was just after a three-day journey through the asteroid belts of JubJub II with Zaphod Bibelbrox at her side nagging and bitching it was quite an effort having sex for so much time). Just before Trillian fell asleep she remembered she forgot something... "Bibelbrox? Zaphod Bibelbrox?" asked the multi-tentacled thing that wore what can be considered to be a policeman's suite. "In the flesh." "You are under arrest for illegal parking. You have the right to remain silent, if you give up this right you will be shot. You have the right to an attorney, if you cannot afford one you will be shot." "What?" "You will be shot!" screamed the policething. "Oh, that. No thank you, tried it once - didn't like it very much." Zaphod replied and passed out again. *** Chapter II: Our Man Z.B. (M/FFF, con, oral, anal, fist, sf, humor, orgy) Zaphod Bibelbrox woke up in the brink with a terrible hang-over. A terrible hang-over! You never actually experienced a hang-over until you had two heads. He felt like a an inter-galactic cruiser driven by an insane driver was flying back and forth in the vacuum of his heads. "Great Zarkon," he thought, "I really need a drink right now." He looked around and saw a policething standing on the other side of the force field playing a board game with another creature who looked like it was dropped a couple of hundred kilometers and landed flat on it's face. "Hey", Zaphod shouted. "Shut up!" shouted the flat person without taking his flat look of the board. Zaphod was not really the type of person that would take instructions from a person that looked so flat he could easily creep under a closed door, he was, after all the president of the Galaxy. "Hey," he shouted again, "I'm not the kind of person who takes orders from a thing that looks so flat he could easily creep under a closed door!" "OK," said the flat person and pulled out a small Kill`OMatic. "OK," said Zaphod and shut up. He moved back to explore the cell in which he was in. It was a rather large cell with a nice bed and three well build women in it. It had a shower and a fancy bathroom and actually looked more like a honeymoon suite then a jail cell. Zaphod looked at the bed, then at the shower, and then at the three well built women. "Hey," he said to the three well built women in the room. "Hey," answered the tall blond chick. "Hey babe," answered the big-breasted brunette. "Hey honey," said the slim brunette. "What are you gals doin' here? Eh?" "Nothing" Said the blond. "What's your names?" "Jill" said the blond. "Trish," said the big-breasted brunette. "Maggie," said the slim brunette. "I'm Zaphod Bibelbrox, and I have a terrible heads-ache. Anyone like to fix it for me?" Jill moved closer to Zaphod and started patting his left head. He started patting her ass in return. Maggie moved closer also and started massaging his shoulders. "Baby, this feels so good, I can just feel my heads-ache disappearing" Zaphod remarked while Trish started patting his chest. Zaphod could not resist and started caressing Trish's ass too. She had a firm round butt you wouldn't believe. He started squashing it harder and harder while kissing Jill a long deep kiss. His third hand started her way under Trish's shirt towards her nice big tits. Maggie stopped the massage and removed her shirt. Zaphod's hand was already busy taking off Jill's panties from under her dress. Trish moved her hands lower and started caressing his groin. Maggie was already busy trying to remove Zaphod's shirt; a thing that proved rather complicated as his left head was kissing Jill and his right one kissing Trish. When Maggie finally got Zaphod's shirt off Trish was already topless and Jill started massaging her tits. Zaphod was now busy fingering Jill with one hand and taking off Maggie's tight shorts off, leaving her with nothing but a pair of shoes she quickly took off. By this time Jill got so excited she was struggling to take Trish's skirt off while Maggie herself was busy taking off Zaphod's pants and shoes. Zaphod himself did not, however, stayed actionless and had his hands all over the place: on Jill's bare bottom, on Maggie's tits and under Trish's skirt Jill was trying so hard to take off. After some time they were all naked, except Jill who still wore her mini-dress and refused to let anyone take it off. Zaphod didn't care though because her nipples were so hard he could see them through her white dress. It actually drove him crazy. He wanted to fuck them so much he forgot all about his heads-ache, the brink, and the flat thing with the Kill'OMatic outside. "Girls," he said finally, "Let's go to the bed. OK?" Wordless the three women let him to the bed and lay him on his back. Trish started jerking him off while kissing his cock every couple of seconds. Jill and Maggie started kissing each other while moving their cunts right over Zaphod's heads. After a few seconds Jill and Maggie stopped kissing and started licking Zaphod's cock while Trish was slowly licking and sucking his balls. Zaphod did not miss his chance and was licking and sucking on Jill's cunt with his left head and slowly fistfucking Maggie while licking her asshole with her right head. As Zaphod was moving his hand in and out of Maggie's wide spread cunt Jill was kissing Trish long and deep kisses as she was titfucking Zaphod's cock moving up and down faster and faster. Zaphod continued fistfucking Maggie that started eating Jill's cunt together with Zaphod's left head. Jill and Trish were kissing rapidly while licking Zaphod's cock and balls and swallowing it one at the time. Maggie could not take it any longer and collapsed on the bad with a scream of orgasm. Trish noticed Maggie's orgasm and decided she wants one too. She pushed Maggie aside and assumed a position over Zaphod's head. Jill, who was now left alone with Zaphod's cock did not think too long a immediately sat on it. Zaphod's right head was now licking Trish's clit and his hand was digging deep into her cunt. With his left head he saw Jill riding his cock from behind and the sight of her ass pressed under her dress made him crazy. He wanted to fuck her in the ass. "I want to fuck you up the ass" he said to Jill who ignored him completely. He used his two left hands to grab Jill's waist and slowly lifted her up and said again "I want your ass baby." Jill paused for a minute and moved slowly, directing his dick right into her small tight asshole. She moaned. Maggie was recovering from her previous climax and started massaging Jill's clit. She slowly turned Jill around to face Zaphod. The feeling of a cock twisting inside her ass sent Jill into a frenzy and she almost came. Trish was swirling back and forth while Zaphod's hand slid in and out her pussy. When she noticed Jill's yellow bush peeping from under her dress she could not help herself and started fingering her. Maggie was on the other side licking Zaphod's cock as it slid in and out of Jill's ass. Trish was about to come and she didn't want to go alone. She slowly pushed her hand into Jill's cunt. Maggie got hold of Trish's big tits and started massaging them as she kept licking Zaphod's cock. That was too much for Trish: a hand in her cunt, a tong licking her clit, her hand in Jill's cunt and Maggie massaging her tits - she came. She came so hard that her entire body shaked and swirled. She moved her hand furiously in and out of Jill's hot cunt, faster and faster. Jill herself was so hot from feeling Zaphod's cock up her ass she started moving faster and faster until she came. She continued moving up and down on Zaphod's cock while Trish now joined Maggie in licking his cock and balls. Zaphod did not intend to give up so soon. He was, after all, the President of the Galaxy. He was pumping his cock in and out Jill's ass and wanted to make her come again. The three girls, however, had other planes. They started stimulating him harder and harder, Jill riding his cock while Maggie and Trish were licking his balls and ass harder and harder. Soon enough Jill felt Zaphod's cum about to purge out of his cock. She gave him a last deep fuck and lifted her ass. Zaphod came all over the place, him cum spilling all over Jill's well fucked ass and squirting on Maggie and Trish's face and tits. Maggie and Trish started kissing each other swapping the cum on their faces and licking the cum on Jill's ass and dress. Zaphod collapsed and fell asleep. The flat person and the policething out the force-field continued their game silently. A door opened. A bearded man came in followed by a slender redheaded girl. "Is this the brink?" asked the bearded man. "Who wants to know?" asked the policething. "The name is Dent, Arthur Dent." *** Chapter III: Random Acts (MMM/F, con, oral, anal, cum, gang-bang, sf, humor) Random stood silently watching Arthur negotiating Zaphod Bibelbrox's release. She was bored. She seldom was not bored. All this flying around with her father saving the galaxy bored her. At this age she should be out on the pink beaches of Selndra IV having endless sex with well built studs. Or at least she could drink something. Or smoke something. Or eat something nice. But I diverse. Random was bored. She wanted to do something else. Something else. She slipped out. "Yes Mister Dent. Of course Mister Dent. I'll get him out right now. Yes, Yes." mumbled the policething and picked up the keycard from the table. "Bibelbrox!" he shouted as he opened the door. "Get out here!" Zaphod woke up from his sleep. He was not going anywhere. He liked it there, with those three nymphos to keep him company. "I'm not going anywhere," she screamed back at the policething, "I like it here." The policething waved his Kill'OMatic at Zaphod's face. "There is a Dent here to see you." "I don't want to see it." shouted Zaphod and let his right head go back to sleep. Arthur came into the cell. Zaphod looked at him for a while and then frowned. "Earthling, I thought I told you to leave me alone!" "I'm helping you get out of here," said Arthur picking up Zaphod's clothes from the floor and handing them to him. "We have to leave this planet in the next five hours." he added silently. "Why?" "Because it's going to be blasted out of exist..." started Arthur. "No! Why do you think I care?" Zaphod interrupted. "Don't you see Earthling, I like it here, with what's her face and the other two babes." "Yes, but you'll be dead in five hours if you won't come with me now." "Ah," started Zaphod, "I do see a potential disadvantage here" he continued and started wearing his clothes. "Can we take some hitch-hikers with us?" "No." "Why?" "Because." "Because why?" "Because I said so." Arthur was feeling very powerful at the moment. Besides, he knew that any attempt to argue rationally with Zaphod will give him a headache. "Will you get a move on it?" he rushed Zaphod, "We don't have much time" "O.K., O.K., I'm coming" he reluctantly put on his shoes and got up from the bed. They left the room as the policething was watching them in a disgusted look. "Such ugly creatures," he said to the flat person sitting at the table. "Yes, really ugly". Arthur almost forgot about Random when they went out. "Were is that girl" he thought to himself hoping she was on her way to the ship. "Have you seen Random?" he asked Zaphod. "Who?" "Random." "Who is random?" "My daughter." "You daughter is random?" "No, her name is Random and she is my daughter!", Arthur lost his senses. "Ah, I yes, I remember her, nice little kid." "She's not really a kid anymore now, she's almost 19 and I think we lost her." "Ah" said Zaphod. "Ah what?" "Ah." "Oh, shut up" Arthur was worried. They had less then five hours to get off the face of this miserable planet and he didn't know where Random was. They might as well go back to the ship and wait for her there. After all this was not the first time Random disappeared. Random was at a bar. She was still bored. She was drinking some red drink that looked like Bloody Mary, smelled like Bloody Mary, and was, in fact, a Bloody Mary. A man rushed through the bar and dropped something on the floor. He noticed that he dropped something on the floor. He stopped and picked up what he dropped on the floor. Random thought the thing he dropped was familiar. She got curious. She kept drinking her Bloody Mary. She was bored. The man that dropped the thing on the floor went into a room on the far end of the bar. Random had a Deja-Vue`. She was no longer bored. She sipped the last of her Bloody Mary and rushed after the man to the room on the other side of the bar. She tried to open the door. It was locked. She knocked on it. "Who is it?" came a voice from inside. "Me" she answered. "Oh, O.K., come on in" the voice replied and the door opened. In the room were three young men (Actually the word men doesn't describe them very well. The word 'Male Underwear Models' would be a better choice. But we'll stick with 'men' for now) partially dressed, sitting around a small table. On the table there was a black object, about the size of a small book. A closer a look at the object will soon reveal to random an inscription on the object. In red, somewhat faded out letters the inscription read: DON'T PANIC Random saw the inscription. She panicked. She looked at the three young men and quickly shut the door. "WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING WITH THIS?" she shouted. "Don't Panic" said one of them. "Do you know what this is?" Random asked. "Don't Panic" said the second guy. "I guess not," Random added. "This is probably the last existing copy of The Hitch-Hicker's Guide to the Galaxy! Do you know what this means?" "No." said the third guy. After a few minutes of not-very-productive conversation Random figured out she was not dealing with the most intelligent life-forms in the Galaxy (a thing which substantiate the claim that they were not just men but rather 'Male Underwear Models'). She gave up and sat on a sofa in the corner of the room trying to think what to do next. One of the men came and sat besides her. He was not wearing a shirt and the site of his chest made her feel alittle horny. It was more then a month since the last time she had sex and she actually missed that. The second guy came over and sat on her other side. He was fully dressed but Random could actually see his muscles move under his shirt. The first guy put his hand on her thigh. Random now got hornier but she tried to push that feeling away. She had to concentrate on the issue of the Guide. She could not allow herself to think of what would it feel like to suck that guy's cock. She had to concentrate. She pushed his hand aside. "You are very lovely" said the guy on her left, smiling a soft smile. "Thanks." "I think you are lovely too," said the guy still sitting on the far end of the room, "can we see how you really look?" he added with a nasty smile? Random was not ready for this. She was horny, she wanted to fuck one of them, but could not decide who. She had to concentrate. The guy in the far corner took his already opened blouse off. Random stared at him. She started unbuttoning her own blouse when the guy on the left started caressing her thigh. This time she did not moved his hand. "Hell," she though, "Who gives a damn about the Galaxy anyway?" and gave in. The guy on the right on Random took his T shirt off and started kissing her neck and eating her ears. The guy on her left was already pressing his hand to her groin slowly massaging her cunt through her tight pants. Random was getting hot. She hinted to the guy on the right to take her shirt off while she started occupying her hands in taking off the shorts of the guy on the left. In a couple of seconds he was naked and Random started kissing his cock. The guy on the right was massaging her tits through her red lace bra, which made Random hotter. She started to take her pants off and was finally wearing nothing but her bra and matching panties. The guys were getting excited and so was Random. She was never really gang-banged (only if you exclude the time she spent with those two space-truckers, but that didn't really count as she only gave then a blowjob) and she was rather looking forward to this. She always fantasized of having more then one cock in her and she never really got to do that. Well, now was her chance. She continued sucking on the left guy's cock but used her left hand to open the other guy's zipper. It didn't take her long before she got his prick out and started giving him a hand job. The guy in the far corner was looking at the sight with pure delight. The guy that was on the right side of Random slipped his hand under Random's ass and started massaging her clit from below. She was all hot and wet and was not going to wait any longer. He pushed her ass up and slowly slit his cock in to her warm wet pussy. Random screamed from pleasure almost biting the cock she had in her mouth. She continued sucking harder and harder as the other guy was fucking her to some unknown rhythm. Random was in a frenzy, the feeling of that dick in her mouth combined with the one in her cunt made her crazy. She sucked harder and harder. In a second she felt the guy she was sucking was about to come and she quickly took his cock out of her mouth and rubbed it on her bra covered tits. He came, splashing his come all over Random's tits and neck. Random was disappointed. She expected him to last alittle longer. But the fun was not over yet. The other guy was still fucking her wits out and it felt great. The guy on the other side of the room got up and stood in front of Random. He was wearing only a tight pair of shorts through which she could easily see his swollen cock. She moved a little and took his shorts off letting his dick come to light. She was amazed. Never in her life had she seen such a cock. It was big! very big! it was no less then 5 centimeters in diameter and as long as 25 centimeters. She wanted it. She wanted it in her mouth. She moved, pushing the guy that was fucking her aside she sitted the guy with the huge cock on the sofa and slowly started licking his balls. She kept licking his balls and started sucking the tip of his cock. It was so big she could hardly get all of it inside her mouth. As she was licking and sucking this huge dick the other guy came around her and started massaging her ass. he put his cock on her asshole and started pushing is slowly inside. Random felt as he was trying to get his cock up her ass and started licking her fingers together with the huge cock. She moistened a finger and moved it round and round her asshole moistening it and the cock that lay ready on it. Then, without any notice the guy behind her slammed his dick into her ass. Random almost choked as she screamed from mixed pain and pleasure while sucking the gigantic cock in her mouth. The men behind her started humping himself in and out of her ass faster and faster. Random was fingering herself furiously when her eyes caught the first guy, standing in the corner already erect again. "There is my chance," she thought and gently moved her ass away from the guy that was fucking her from behind. "I want you in my cunt" she said to the guy with the big cock as she got up for air. "Yes" he said "I want that too." She got up and directed him to the floor where she lay him down on his back. She quickly got rid of her web panties and her cum drenched bra and slowly sat on his huge prick as each centimeter was sending waves of pleasure up her spine. The other two guys were looking at the action and were not sure what to do. The guy that was fucking her up the ass seemed to want to continue what he was doing but Random motioned him to come near her. She started licking his balls and the space between the balls and the asshole. The third guy was already hard as a rock and quickly mounted Random from behind, pushing his cock harder and harder into her asshole. Random was crazy from pleasure. She started sucking the cock in front of her faster and faster until, in one tremendous climax, she came. The boys were not finished yet. The guy with the big cock fucked her harder and harder almost to the verge of pain. The guy that was fucking her ass was pumping himself into her faster and faster while massaging her firm tits with one of his hands. Random was sucking the cock so skillfully, licking his tip and squishing his balls until in a few seconds she felt him come. A long, warm splash of cum flowed into her mouth as she was being fucked by two other guys. The feel of the cum in her mouth and on her tongue was too exciting for her and she came again, swallowing every bit of cum that she could reach. She was left with two guys fucking her two major holes and that felt great. She moved faster and faster, up and down and in every possible direction. She felt the guy fucking her ass ready to come again. She moved faster and faster. He suddenly pulled himself out of her and splashed his load all over her ass and back. It felt great. Warm and gooie. She had now one huge cock in her, one cock that refused to come. She grabbed the guy's back and quickly turned him over. She lay on her back as he pumped in and out of her, kissing her tities and fingering her asshole. Suddenly he stopped. He took his prick out and pointed it at her face. In a second he came, squirting his cum all over her face while fingering her clit with his other hand. Random could not take it any longer, that was too much. Four loads of cum shut on her almost at the same time. She came for the third time collapsing from exhaustion on the floor, spreading the cum all over her tits and belly, licking her cum drenched fingers. After a while she got dressed again, leaving her panties and bra on the floor. She felt her shirt stick to her cum soaked body and it made her feel good. She was no longer bored. As least for now. Then she remembered. The Guide. "Hey guys, where did you get this?" "I found it," said the guy with the big cock. "Can I have it?" asked Random. "Arr... Yes. I think" said the guy that came twice looking at his friends. They nodded. Random looked at her watch. It was late. "Ea., I have to go now, O.K.?" "O.K." "O.K., bye" she said and rushed out of the room as if a well armed Vogon spaceship was about to destroy the entire planet in a few minutes. Which was not far from the truth. *** Chapter IV: Marvin Fixes Things (F/Android, con, mast, shave, sf, humor) Ford was pacing back and forth on the ship's bridge. Trillian was sitting on a stool in front of the computer console trying to explain to the computer what is 'Solitaire', needless to say she was unsuccessful. It was an old computer that refused to learn anything new. In fact, even newer computers refused to learn anything new. But nevermind that. Trillian was not the kind of girl too give up a favorite habit. Arthur was trying to explain to Zaphod, who was obviously uninterested, why they have to leave the planet and why they cannot leave it without Random. "The Vogons are going to destroy this planet in about one hour" Arthur was saying. "Ah," Zaphod was not listening. "So we have to leave here as soon as we can" Arthur continued. "Ah," Zaphod was not listening. "But we can't, because Random is not here." "Ah." Ford looked at Arthur and frowned, "He should have never brought Random with him, It was too dangerous" he thought to himself and went to sit by Trillian. She grinned as he stood above her and continued explaining to the computer the idea behind not cheating in Solitaire. "Maybe we can send Marvin to look for her" Arthur popped an idea to the air. There was no reply from the people around him. He thought about it some more and decided that it would be best just to keep waiting. Random walked in. Prostetnik Vogon Yelts was delighted. He just loved blowing off planets. And this time he didn't have to warn all the people on the planet. Just a nice clean shot and pouf!, no more nice planet with ugly people on it. That was delightful. He pressed a button and an officer appeared at the door. "How much time yet?" screamed Prostetnik Vogon at the officer. "Thirty minutes and five seconds!" quivered the officer. Prostetnik Vogon Yelts could not wait. He wanted to see the planet go in fire. "Hell," he thought, "What's 30 minutes anyway?" and fired the massive guns of his ship. There was a bright light as the planet below vanished from existence. "Full power to the engines" screamed Ford Perfect at the computer. "They're almost thirty minutes ahead of schedule, we're lucky to get out of there alive!" The computer made some strange sounds and shut himself out. "What?" yelled Arthur, "What's going on? what's wrong with the computer?" "Nothing" said Trillian, "What do mean nothing? It's dead!" screamed Arthur. "Yes, so there is nothing wrong with it. It's doing just what you would expect from a dead computer" Trillian winked at Arthur. "Don't worry, we're out of danger, for now." They looked through the main viewer screen at the blank spot in space of what was, only a few seconds ago, a very nice planet (actually, it wasn't very nice a planet but you can't really blame it for that can you? It's not the plant's fault that it's sun was too hot in the winter and too cold in the summer therefore making it a paradise for tourists. Of course, with the tourists came the big casinos, small stinking bars and red-light districts that made the planet a breading heaven in to the emigrant population of Bornagainchristians. Actually, if you think about it, the Vogons were doing humanity a favor by destroying the ugly old place). "Marvin," Ford's voice came through the ship's speakers, "Would you drag your paranoid ass in here." Marvin appeared at the door. "You should know that flattery will get you nowhere" he said sarcastically to Ford. "Good, you're here" Trillian got up "can you fix this thing" she continued, pointing at the computer console. Marvin moaned. He opened a panel and moved some cords in the belly of the computer. The computer sprang back to live. "Is there anything else I can do for you?" Marvin asked depressed, "Perhaps make some dinner?" he added in a sarcastic tone. Hhere he was, the smartest android in the universe and they wanted him to fix a century old computer. He was insulted. "Dinner?" Zaphod woke up from his daydreaming, "Did anyone say dinner?" "No time now," Trillian cut him off, "we need to get a better ship. We cannot possibly be expected to save the Galaxy in this old rack." "Save the Galaxy?" asked Ford, "you mean this is not just a reunion?" "No" said Trillian. "Not again," said Zaphod, "All this going around saving the Galaxy gives me a heads ache. Can't we go to some sunny planet and sit on the beach?" "Well," said Trillian, "The nearest Ship-Yard is on a Sensoua IX, I guess we could stop there for a day or two to rest. We don't have to meet the Galors until the day after tomorrow." "Galors?" asked Random. "Yeah, Galors, what are you deaf?" Ford hissed her. "Does this place have a beach?" "Yeah," replied Zaphod although the question was directed at Trillian, "Great beach. Computer, Sensoua IX please, and step on it!" he continued. "Yes sir, Sensoua IX sir, and stepping on it" replied the computer. "Well, I guess I'll go shave my legs if we're going to the beach" Trillian winked at Ford and left the room. Trillian went into her room. She slowly took her clothes off and went stood in front of the mirror. She really had a great body. Firm tits, long legs, tight little ass. She took a razor from the closet and went into the shower. She filled the tub with water and slowly slid herself into the warm water. She started shaving her legs, slowly moving the razor on every inch of her long legs, soaping them slowly and carefully so the shave will be smoother. She felt good. The warm water relaxed her and she started humming a tune. She got up and sat on the tip of the tub. She started shaving her bikini line. Slowly and carefully moving the razor next to her cunt. It felt nice. She decided do a daring thing. She was going to shave her pussy. She went to the closet and took a can of shaving foam out. Funny, she thought, if only Ford knew what she was using this for he would probably freak. She shook the can and sprayed a small amount of foam on her hand. She slowly spread the foam on her pussy hair and started rubbing it into her skin. The feeling of the foam on her cunt lips made her horny. She slowly started shaving the side of her cunt, gently lifting her lips so she could shave them better. She slowly continued shaving the hair off her cunt when each time the razor touched her she got hotter and hotter. She finished shaving herself and was happy with the result. Her cunt was completely hairless except a small triangle of hair just above it. She sat down in the tub again and started washing off the remaining shaving foam from her cunt. This made her hot, the feeling of the hot water on her newly exposed clit drove her crazy. She started touching herself. First gently rubbing her clit and then fingering herself. It felt good. She wanted more. She got out of the tub and took a towel from the counter. She started drying herself, slowly rubbing the towel on her tits, pressing and pinching her hard nipples. She moved the towel downwards and started drying her cunt. The feeling of the soft cloth on her pussy lips was good. She started massaging her cunt with the towel. It felt so good she thought she was about to come. She dropped the towel and continued rubbing her clit with one hand while her other hand reached for the razor. She sat on the warm floor and spread her legs wide open. She felt the steam in the room on the exposed cunt. It was great. She took the razor and slowly inserted the handle to her now totally wet cunt. She was taking the razor handle in and out of her pussy while her thumb was pressed against her clit. Faster and faster she inserted the handle into her hole, pressing her thumb harder on her clit. But that was not enough. She wanted more. She got up from the floor and went into her bedroom. From under the bed she took out a vibrator. She pressed the button on it's bottom. Nothing. She tried again; Nothing, Nada, Zero, Blank, the damn thing just wouldn't work. She was about to go crazy when a thought hit her. In a second she was at the comm-pad on the wall. "Marvin! I need you! NOW!" she shouted into the microphone. Three seconds later Marvin was there. Being an android he wasn't too excited with the fact that in front of him stood a gorgeous woman, naked, with a shaved cunt almost dripping from desire. "Marvin, what's wrong with this damn vibrator?" she asked and handed it over to the android. Marvin looked at if for a second or so and said bluntly, "No Power." "Damn," she replied, "I need it to work now. Can you supply the power?" "Yes." "Good, do so!" Marvin took off the bottom of the vibrator and stuck his hand into it. It started to move. Trillian was delighted. She sat herself on the bad and moved Marvin closer. She took Marvin's hand with the vibrator attached to it and started rubbing it over clit. It felt great. She was in the seventh heaven with her toy working. She continued rubbing her clit with the vibrator and started massaging her breasts with her other hand, squeezing her nipples harder and harder. She felt so hot it amazed her. She started pushing the vibrator into her pussy. Slowly and slowly she got the thing completely inside her. "Faster," she told Marvin almost screaming, "make it move faster!" Marvin increased the voltage to the vibrator which now began shaking like it had a will of its. The shakes of the vibrator inside her cunt made Trillian crazy. She started moving herself like a maniac pushing the thing deeper and deeper into her juicy cunt while rubbing her clit with her other hand. This was too much, in a second she came, screaming like crazy and twisting her entire body around the vibrator that was now stuck deep inside her. She collapsed on the bad with the vibrator still buried deep inside her twisting and shaking. She told Marvin to cut the power and he did. She took his hand out of the vibrator while leaving the thing inside her. "If you tell anyone about that," she said in a serious look, "You're dead! Now get out." Marvin left the room feeling a little happier then usual. He was not happy in the ordinary sense of the word. Just happier then he usually was. He had a feeling of fulfillment, as if this was the thing he was build for. He knew, of course, that was not what he was build for. He was also very wrong. This was exactly what he was built for. Marvin, as he would soon find out, was a part of a greater scheme. Marvin was about to save the Galaxy while fulfilling his original role as a giant vibrator. *** Chapter V: Beach Party (M/F, M/F, con, oral, anal, cum, st, humor) Galors. Galors are a curious race. They seem to be the only race that does not live on actual planets. They live on asteroids. They are short, humanoid beings with an intelligence far beyond that of other races. They are a very justfull race, devoted to making the universe a better place to live in. That's part of the reason they live on asteroids, nobody wants them on their planet. The rest of the reason why they live on asteroids involves the fact they are immortal. Jemb open a communication channel. From his office on Asteroid 615ASD he had a great look at the Solar system. The blue and white planet below was blinking in and out of existence. This was not a good sign. It meant that the Vogons did not do their job properly. "AHUUUUAHHUU" a scream came trough the comm channel. "What do you want?" asked the voice of Prostetnic Vogon Yeltz from the speakers. "Have you done what I told you?" "Yes Sir!" grumbled the Vogon, "Blasted the planet to dust. Even ahead of schedule!" "What?" screamed Jemb. "You sordid idiot, nut brain, low life piece of jello. You destroyed the planet? I told you to destroy the book not the entire planet!" Prostetnic Vogon Yeltz was not sure if the words spoken by Jemb were insults or compliments. He went for compliments. "Yes sir" he said proudly, "Blasted both the planet and the book" he explained, not forgetting to mention again that he was ahead of schedule. Jemb was furious. He knew he should never have used the Vogons for this job. They were too dumb to do things right. He closed the comm channel without even replying to the Vogon's boasting. The planet below continued blinking in and out of existence. His only chance now was the ape. He opened another channel. "Yes?" Arthur Dent's voice came through the speakers. "Earthling," said Jemb, "It's so bad to here you again." "J..." Arthur started saying something but was interrupted. "I hope you did not forget our appointment" continued Jemb. "Ah, no" "Good" said Jemb and shut down the comm channel. On the beach at Sensua IX Ford was sipping a cold refreshing drink, smoking a large Cuban cigar, and fondling the breasts of a busty blond. The reader might think it strange that Ford was smoking a Cuban Cigar several light years away from the place where Cuba, joined to the rest of the world, was now blinking in and out of existence. Well, just to set things on the right side the same reader should know that Cuban Cigars are made in the Planet Cubacus orbiting the second star of the binary system Uhy. The reader should however be puzzled from the fact that those Cigars found their way to the large continent on which the place call Cuba exits (actually, exists-not-exists). This is one of life's little mysteries never to be solved. But I diverse. On the beach at Sensua IX Ford was sipping a cold refreshing drink, smoking a large Cuban cigar, and fondling the breasts of a busty blond. "Ford, stop that" said the blond giggling. Ford stopped fondling her tits and took a sip from his drink. "You know Het," he said looking at the lovely pink sea, "this place makes me horny". Het giggled. She wasn't the smartest creature in the world, but then, she had the most marvelous pair of tities you ever seen. Ford was feeling his cock swell as he was starring at her tits which seemed to want nothing more but to get out of the green bikini that was constraining them. Ford was about to invite Het to his ship when he remembered he doesn't have one. Arthur was at ship-yard with Trillian trading the old rack for a newer rack. "Lets get a room" he suggested. "Where would you put it?" Het replied after a few seconds of thought. "Ah?" Ford got confused. "No. I mean lets rent a room at the hotel over there so we can fuck our brains out" he quickly gathered his senses. "That sounds lovely" Het looked at the high building Ford was referring too. She got up and cleaned the sand from her ass and thighs. Ford got up too dropping the lit bud of his cigar on the sand. They left for the hotel. Seconds later a young woman stepped on the lit bud and burned her foot. (This is not actually a part of the story. The fact that the young woman burned her foot have nothing to do with the plot. Its here just to remind you that if you ever drop a lit cigar bud on the beach at Sensua IX you may very well cause someone to burn his foot.) The room was nice. It had a large water bed with pink sheets and mirrored walls. Just what you would expect from this kind of place. Ford was horny as hell. He felt his cock pulsing in his pants. He grabbed Het from behind and started massaging her large tits pressing his crouch against her ass. He quickly got rid of her bikini top and started pinching her nipples. Het seemed to like it. She reached back and unbuttoned Ford's fly. Ford kept massaging her tits and pinching her nipples. Het stuck her hands into Ford's pants and started rubbing his long cock while putting her other hand into her bikini bottom and fingering herself. Ford stood back and took his pants down looking at the blond babe fingering herself and pinching her nipples. He sat on the waterbed and watched as Het was taking her bikini off and standing naked infront of him spreading her pink cunt lips with one hand and rubbing her clit with the other. She was so hot Ford could actually see her pussy dripping small drops of moist on the floor. "Come here," he said as he lay naked on the bed. Het woke up from her exctasy dreaming and moved over to the bed. She lay on her belly besides ford with both her hands still rubbing her pussy. Ford looked for a few seconds in silence as the girl near him masturbated her wits out moving her ass up and down while her fingers go in and out of her wet cunt. He decided it was time for more action and grabbed her ass in both hands setting her on all fours. He got up behind her and put his hand on her wet pussy. He lay himself on his back, his head just under Het's open dripping cunt and slowly started licking her. From this position Ford had a great viewpoint of her pink, wet cunt. He used his hands to spread her pussy lips and look a long look at her black opened hole. Het was in a frenzy, screaming and moaning as Ford was licking her wet cunt, sucking her juices, while his tongue was playing catch with her clitoris. Het moaned harder and harder, pressing her tits harder and harder with the hand she was not leaning on. Ford liked her. He hadn't ate such a great pussy for a long time now. He kept licking and sucking and started to rub Het's asshole with one hand as the other was helping Het with her large breast. Het was going wild until finally ford stuck his small finger into her asshole. The feeling of his finger inside her ass drove Het into new heights and she came screaming. "Wow," she said, "I never had anything in there. That feels great." "Yes? Well, if you liked one finger, you'll probably like my cock as well" Ford said and got up behind her. He started to slowly push his cock into her asshole as Het was moaning with pleasure. When he was finally in he fixed his position alittle and started fingering Het's still wet cunt. Het was delighted. She have never had someone fuck her up the ass and it felt great. She pushed her hand over his hand and slowly inserted his fingers in her cunt while she herself was rubbing her clit in circular movement. With every stroke of Ford's big cock in her ass her felt hotter, rubbing herself faster and faster. Ford was really on top of her. He was pumping his dick harder and harder into her ass as each pump sent waves of pleasure up his spine. The idea that he was the only one to fuck her ass was great, and what made things even better for him was that her hole was to tight he could feel it closing on his cock like a hand holding a stick. Ford kept humping and pumping Het's ass as she was fingering herself and guiding his fingers into her cunt. In a flash Het was coming again. A long hard orgasm that shook her entire body. Het came so hard that she was practically sucking him deeper into her asshole. Ford could not take it much more. Her ass was so tight it drove him insane and in one hard blow her shot his load deep inside her asshole. He pulled back and as they both collapsed on the waterbed he could actually see drops of cum dripping out of the tight little asshole he was fucking a second ago. "Grrr..." mumbled Het as she let her body relax from the effort, "I liked that." "Me too" grinned Ford and fell asleep. On the beach Random was sitting alone. She was reading the Guide she got the other day from the three studs at the bar. She tried to find the entry for Sensua IX but the Guide insisted that there are only eight planets in the Sensua system. She gave up. A lifeguard yelled at her something she did not quite understand. She decided to go and check it out. "What?" she said to the lifeguard as she entered his small hut. "Youarenotallowedtowearanythingonthisbeachbutbathingsuites!" he said. "What?" "Youhavetowearabathingsuit." "Canyouspeakslower?" she asked in reply. "Yes." "So, what do want?" "You can't wear this," the lifeguard said with great effort to talk slower. He pointed at her jeans and T shirt. "You have to wear a bathing suit." "Why?" "Becausethat'stherule." "I don't see a sign anywhere saying that" she insisted. The lifeguard kneeled down and lifted a sign from the floor. He showed it to Random. It said "All humanoids must wear bathing suits. Other races must expose at least two tentacles!" "But" said Random, "I don't have any." The lifeguard looked stunned. In all the time he was working on the beach he never heard such a thing. He sat on a chair to think. Random looked at him. "Nice built", she thought, "I wander how big he is" she giggled to herself. The lifeguard turned around and said "Bigenough." "How did you..." Random started saying amazed. "I can read your mind," he said slowly, "didn't you know that?" he continue and pointed to a sign above their heads that said "Telepath Lifeguard on Duty: Bathing hours 10:00 to 16:00 - 'Don't Even Think About It Corp.'" "Well," she thought, "Do you think you can fuck me?" She giggled "Onlyifyouwantmeto" he replied to her thought. "Let's see if I do" she moved closer to him and put her hand on his groin. She felt a large bump forming under his shorts. "It is rather big," she thought "not as big as the guy in the bar, but not bad at all." The lifeguard looked insulted. "Don't be insulted," she said, "You're really not bad." The lifeguard grinned and stood up. Random was about to take his shorts off when he backed off and went out the hut. Random could not figure out this guy. He was strange. That excited her. As she was about to follow him out he came back in and closed the door behind him. "I had totake offthe sign" he tried to say slowly but the excitement swept him. Random grinned. She kneeled in front of him and took his shorts down with one strong pull. His cock brushed against her face. "Nice" she said and took it in her hand. She started licking the top of his cock, taking it into her mouth every couple of seconds. This made the lifeguard quiver with delight as his cock got harder and harder with every lick and kiss. Random new what she was doing. She was an excellent cock-sucker and she knew it. She put the tip of his cock in her mouth and started sucking it in while licking it with her tongue. The lifeguard was excited. Random kept sucking the tip of his cock and started massaging his balls. She squeezed them harder and harder making him beg for her to suck his entire cock. She did. She started deep throating him, sucking the entire length of his cock, pushing it deeper and deeper into her mouth until she could hardly breath. Her hand was skillfully rubbing the base of his large cock until she felt he was about to explode. "I want you to come on my face" she thought while still sucking him. In a second he pulled out of mouth and she kept jerking him off until he came. Two long hard shots of cum were sprayed right into her face. Random was delighted, she started spreading his jizz on her face, licking the cum from her fingers and lips until her face was filled with the warm sticky juice. She sucked his cock for the rest of the cum that was left in it and got up. The lifeguard pulled his pants up and looked at her. He could read her mind swirling with emotions as the recalled the sight of his cock splashing her face with those warm white streams. Random looked at the lifeguard and thought "I have to go, I have Zaphod waiting for me at the bar." "Itsbeennicegettingtoknowyou" said the lifeguard and went for the door. "Wait," Random stopped him and went to the water basin in the corner, "I can't go out like that, no matter how good it feels" she continue and washed her face. She dried herself up and opened the door. "My name is Random," she said as she walked out, "remember that." She disappeared behind the small shack. Zaphod was sitting at the bar bumping his heads at the counter as he was passing in and out of consciousness. *** Chapter VI: The Heart of Gold (BM/WF, con, inter, sf, humor) The salesman walked into the the large hangar. "You are going to like that one" he said as Arthur and Trillian followed him in. He approached what seemed to be a large ship covered with a black cloth. He walked to the wall and pressed a button. A sound of a mechanical engine filled the air as the black cloth was lifted by a chain from above. Arthur and Trillian stood there amazed. "Ar..." Arthur started saying to Trillian "Yeah..." she replied not taking her eyes of the ship. The ship in front of them was The Heart of Gold. "It can't be The Heart of Gold, can it?" Arthur whispered to Trillian. "Can't be!" Trillian replied. "This," said the salesman ignoring his customers' awe, "is an exact replica of the ship known as 'The Heart of Gold'. Naturally, it doesn't have the Improbability Drive engine the original one had, but its fast enough as it is." Ford and Trillian relaxed. "How much?" Trillian asked the salesman. "I think we can arrange something that will satisfy us all" he replied winking at her and smiling a naughty grin. Trillian looked at him. "He is rather handsome", she thought, "I bet he is big too. Black men normally are." She grinned back. "Can I?" Arthur asked pointing at the ship. "Make yourself at home" the salesman replied and pressed another button on the wall. The door to the fake Heart of Gold opened and Arthur walked slowly in. "We'll be at the office, discussing the sale" Trillian shouted as he disappeared inside. The salesman walked into the office on the other side of the hangar. Trillian followed him looking at his butt as he walked. "Nice" she thought to herself feeling rather naughty at what she was going to do. She never fucked someone for a sale and would probably never have done it if he wasn't so cute and she didn't want that ship so badly. As she entered the room the salesman locked the door. He pulled down the shades and approached her. Trillian knew what he wanted. She knew what she wanted. She got closer to him and started kissing him. Long deep kisses, her tongue exploring every corner in his deep warm mouth. This made her hot, she grabbed his ass with one hand while rapping her other hand over his large, firm shoulders. She was kissing him wildly and it felt great. She felt herself getting wet, her shaved pussy moistening her small tight panties. The salesmen started grabbing her exposed ass underneath her dress, pulling her G-string in and out of the slit of her ass. Trillian started unbuttoning his white shirt licking his black chest and sucking on his nipples. The salesmen started massaging her tits, pressing them and pinching her nipples through the thin cloth of her dress. Trillian left his unbuttoned shirt on and started opening his pants until she got he large prick out. She stood for a minute holding it in her hands and enjoying the look of the big black thong. The salesman wasn't going to let her have all the fun and he quickly opened the top button of her dress and grabbed her left tit in his big hand, squashing her nipple between his fingers. Trillian moaned and started rubbing his cock as he opened another button of her dress and let her firm tits come into full view. He started licking her nipples and sucking each nipple in turn while pinching and quizzing the other. Trillian moaned with pleasure, feeling hot and wet. She pulled back and sat on a chair in the corner. She pulled off her panties and spread her legs. The salesman looked at Trillian with delight. She slowly pulled up her dress exposing her pink, shaved cunt, all wet from anticipation. The salesman undressed and stood naked in front of Trillian who, looking at his big black cock, started touching herself, spreading her cunt lips and massaging her tits, desperately trying to lick her own nipples. The black stud moved closer to her and kneeled on the floor. He pushed Trillian's hand away from her hot cunt and started licking her fully exposed clit, backing out every couple of seconds to admire her pink open pussy. Trillian was on the verge of orgasm, moaning and screaming as the salesman was licking her clit and pushing his fingers deep inside her. He pulled back alittle and used both his hands to spread her pussy lips apart, looking at her black, open hole. He started blowing air into her cunt, every now and then licking and sucking her clit to moisten her. The felling of cold air touching her clit, penetrating deep inside her cunt drove Trillian into a mindblowing orgasm. She pushed his mouth to her cunt as she came quivering. The salesmen, however, was not going to be left unsatisfied. He stood up and grabbed Trillian's waist, gently lifting her off the chair and slowly sitting her on his cock. Trillian felt his cock penetrating her slowly, rubbing her clit as it went deeper and deeper inside her until there was nowhere left to go. The salesman kicked the chair away and moved a step forward, sending Trillian into a frenzy as his cock pushed deeper into her almost to the verge of pain. Trillian rapped her lags around his black, muscled back as he pushed her back to the wall. He started lifting Trillian up and down, sitting her on his cock as if she was no heavier then an inflating doll. Trillian was kissing him deeper and deeper as his hands massaged her ass. The salesman started rubbing Trillian's asshole which made her moan even loader, "Please, put it in" she gasped in his ear. He started rubbing her asshole faster and faster until it was all wet. Then he slowly pushed his middle finger up her ass. Trillian screamed with pleasure and came a second time, pressing against him so he would penetrate deeper into her (as if that was possible). The salesman felt Trillian's cunt sucking his cock in and he came right there and then, shooting his load deep into Trillian's pussy. Trillian was still coming and the feeling of the guy's cum flowing deep inside her made her come even harder. She kept riding his cock until she felt him shoot his last load of cum into her. The salesman pulled away and started getting dressed. Trillian straitened her dressed and picked up her panties from the floor. She was about to wear them as she decided she was feeling naughty and put them in her purse instead. She watched the salesman as he was putting his shirt back on. "Lovely body" she thought to herself wishing she could fuck him again sometime. The salesman walked to a shelf and pulled out some papers. He put them on the table and wrote some stuff on them. He looked at Trillian and grinned. "I need your sig here" he pointed at the paper. Trillian approached the table and looked at the papers. She signed by the cross and gave the pen back to the salesman. "And here" he continued and pointed at another paper. She signed it too. A few minutes later Trillian was navigating a brand new Replicated Heart of Gold out of the ship yard. Ford woke up alone. He felt naked. He looked down and found out that he was, in fact, naked. He went into the bathroom and took a quick shower. A large glass clock was hanging on the wall. One hand was on 5, the other on 15. Ford looked up and saw the clock. Two seconds later he was already running on the beach towards the small bar were he left Zaphod several hours ago. As he arrived at the bar Arthur and Trillian were standing outside looking angry, while Random was supporting Zaphod who was, as he was most of the time lately, too drunk to stand. "You are late" Trillian looked at Ford with a harsh eye. "So-ry, ba-by," Ford replied smiling, "had some stuff to do." "What?" Arthur was pissed. "Had to sleep. Lighten up willya?" Ford said angrily. "Did you get a ship?" "You should see the ship..." Arthur started excited but Trillian hushed him. They went around the bar and into the parking place. Ford stood silently. Random stood silently. Even Zaphod tried to stand silently. "Its..." Ford started. "Not the Heart of Gold." Trillian cut him off walking towards the large ship. "Only a replica." Arthur explained and boarded the ship as well. Random guided Zaphod into the belly of the ship while Ford continued standing outside with his mouth wide open. A minute later he followed as Trillian came out again and rushed him in. In the ship everything looked the same at the original Heart of Gold. The same bridge. The same panels, even the same computer. "Computer." "Yes `mam. How can I help you `mam? Lovely to hear you `mam." "Oh, shut up!" "Yes `mam, shutting up `mam." "Computer," Trillian continued, and hastingly added "don't answer me, just listen. We need to get to the System Sol as soon as possible. We need to get to Asteroid 615ASD in the asteroid belt around the star Sol. Is that understood?" No reply. "Answer me damn it, is that understood?" "Yes `mam. Understood `mam. Ast..." the computer continued saying how well he understood the command as everyone left for their rooms. *** Chapter VII: On The Way (M/F/Android, con, anal, oral, cum, sf, humor) Random dragged Zaphod to his room as everyone left the bridge of the Heart of Gold. He was now sobering up slowly and was now able to stand up on him own. Random looked at him and laughed. He looked so pathetic walking in circles around the room mumbling "Trish... Maggie... Nice ass... Oh..." "Hey," she shouted in his ear, "wake up! We will be at Sol soon." "Trng.. Brrrr.. Drugggg." "What?" "Tringgg Beerrrr Druggg" he tried to tell Random something. "I give up" random exclaimed and was about to leave the room when something at the back of her head told her not to. "Tringerbeer Drug," she thought, "That was what he was mumbling. She called Marvin on the speakers. Tringerbeer Drug is an anti-alchoholic drink that was used to sober up very drunk people several years ago. It was officially banned from use because its side effects included, among others, a rapid drop of intelligence each consecutive time it was used. Zaphod was using this drink rather rapidly in the past two years with no apparent effect on his intelligence. Of course, when you have zero intelligence you can't really loose much of it, can you? Marvin entered the room, he seemed as depressed as always. "Yes?" he asked as if he wanted nothing but not to hear any answer. "Marvin, I need you to get Zaphod a Tringerbeer Drug" Random said, sitting on the bed. Marvin looked around and went to the bar at the corner of the room. He looked around and pulled a couple of bottles. He started mixing something in a glass and in a minute gave the glass to Random. He went to the corner of the room and shut himself off. Random looked at the glass and slowly made Zaphod drink it. "Baby!" Zaphod jumped up after about three sips. He was all shaken (not stirred) and energetic. "This thing really wakes you up?" Random asked him. "Oh yeah, baby, It's almost as good as sex." He paused. "Remind me to tell you about it sometime" He continued and started undressing expecting Random to leave the room. Random herself was again about to leave the room when she caught a glimpse of Zaphod cock getting harder under his boxer-shorts. She changed her mind and decided to stay. She was not thinking about having sex with him, but the sight of Zaphod shorts filled with a large, obviously hard, cock enchanted her. She stood in the corner and stared at him. Zaphod was, as usual, too busy adoring himself to notice her. He took off his shirt and then pulled of his shorts. His cock jumped up standing in a perfect 45 degrees. "Ah" Random exclaimed licking her lips. Zaphod looked up at her. "I thought you left baby" he grinned. "No" she answered, not taking her eyes of his cock. Zaphod sat on the bed. "Ever seen one?" he asked amazed by the young girl's staring. "More then one" she winked at him. She approached the bed and kneeled on the floor her mouth just a few centimeters from his cock. She put her forefinger in her mouth and licked it. She then started moving her wet finger slowly on the tip of his cock. Zaphod shivered with excitement. He leaned forward and pulled Random's shirt off. Random felt the cool air touching her breasts through the small holes of her lace bra. Her nipples hardened and almost popped out through the lace. She started rubbing Zaphod's cock with two fingers moving her hand up and down his long dong licking her lips as she did so. She slowly started licking his cock as she was struggling to take her panties off from under her skirt. She finally pulled them off and started rubbing herself. Random took the tip of Zaphod's cock in her mouth and started licking it as she was squeezing his balls and the lower end of his cock. Zaphod started moaning. His cock seemed to get bigger with every suck. He leaned over again and undid the hook of Random's bra. Random removed her hand from her snatch and quickly took her bra off. She grabbed both her tits and started pressing them over Zaphod's cock. She continued titfucking him, sucking the tip of his cock whenever it reached her mouth. At the back of the room Marvin turned himself on again. The android was surprised to find Zaphod titfucking Random as she was kneeling on the floor. Marvin remembered his experience with Trillian and the vibrator and the feeling of not-complete-depression that followed it. He decided to take part in the action as well. Since there was no vibrator in the room that he knew of he grabbed a bottle from the bar and slowly moved closer to Random. He placed his hands on her waist and tried to lift her ass up. Random startled. She looked back and saw Marvin standing behind her grabbing her waist. She giggled and lifted her ass up still working her tits on Zaphod's cock. Marvin looked at Random's red bush from behind and slowly took the bottle and started rubbing it against it grabbing her ass with his other hand. Random felt the cold bottle touch her cunt and started moving her ass forward and backward rubbing herself against the cold glass dildo. Her moist cunt started dripping when Marvin lowered the bottle and in one hard thrust pushed it deep into her waiting pussy. Random screamed with pleasure as she felt the bottle penetrating her. She started rubbing her tits faster and faster over Zaphod's hard dick while moving her ass up and down, forward and backwards driving the glass dildo deeper inside her. She felt Zaphod was about to come. She pressed her tits herder over his cock sucking its tip as if her life depended on it. She finally felt his cock filling up with cum and pulled it out from her mouth letting him spray his load all over her face and tits. She started playing with his cum rubbing it with one finger on her hard nipples. It felt great. Random now got up from the floor pushing Marvin away leaving him with a wet bottle in his hand. She got up on the bad and started sucking harder on Zaphod's relaxing cock. It was not long before his cock was fully erect again, ready for action. She kept sucking his cock as her hand was rubbing her clit. Zaphod was ready for more. "I want to fuck your ass baby" he said. Random grinned and got up. She turned herself around and sat herself on Zaphod, slowly pushing his cock into her tight asshole. The feeling was great. Every movement she made sent waves of pleasure up her spine. She started massaging her cum drenched tits, which made her even hotter. Zaphod was holding her waist moving her up and down on his cock as his third hand was squeezing her clit and spreading her cunt lips open. "Come here" he said to the android that was standing there not knowing what do to. Marvin moved closer and as Zaphod was spreading Random's cunt lips open he took the bottle and pushed it into her dripping cunt. Random moaned and screamed as she was being fucked and was enjoying every minute. She moved up and down on Zaphod's cock and with every movement she made Marvin was pushing the bottle deeper into her. She started screaming louder and driving Zaphod's cock deeper into her ass when she came. She came and came and came and seemed to come for several minutes. The strain on Zaphod was too big. Random's tight ass holding his cock deep inside as the girl was coming made him explode to shooting hit second load deep up her ass. Random collapsed on Zaphod's chest, pulling Marvin, who seemed not to dislike every minute, away. She rested like that for a couple of minutes, Zaphod's cock still plunged deep inside her ass hole when a voice came on the speakers. "Stopping at System Sol as requested" the computer loudly announced. Random quickly pulled Zaphod out of her and headed for the shower. Zaphod, as usual, fell asleep. *** Chapter VIII: The Other Side of the Galaxy (FFF, con, anal, sf, humor) Jemb was not happy. The planet below was performing it's disappearing act ever more rapidly. And the earthling was late. He got up from his chair and opened a door. He looked outside to the vast, black space searching for a ship. I a Minute a ship was there. He went out the door and leaped into the ship's airlock. A hissing sound filled the small room as the air was entering it. It made him dizzy. Oxygen always made him feel alittle strange. The air-lock inner door opened and Jemb stepped forward into the Heart of Gold's bridge. "Hey," Arthur said not looking at the Galor behind him. "Big problems" Jemb replied. "The Vogons were stupid enough to destroy the entire planet without even checking to see if the book was there, which obviously it wasn't." "So you are the stupid asshole who had the planet destroyed," Zaphod interrupted, "we barely had a chance..." a harsh look from Jemb silenced him. "Do you have the book?" Jemb looked at Arthur. "No, why? You mean you don't know were it is?" Arthur almost panicked. "Not good." "Yeah..." Zaphod started, only to be cut off again by Jemb's fierce look. "What bo..." Random started asking as she entered the room only to be cut off by Trillian who started saying something only to be interrupted by Zaphod who started saying something but was again silenced by Jemb. "We will have to look for it then. You see, if the book will not be destroyed soon this entire system will just fade out, and I haven't even had my breakfast today" Jemb continued, ignoring the astonishment in the room. At this point it is possible that the reader might feel a little out of place in regards to why the Solar system is about to blink out of existence, who wants to destroy it, what does the Guide have to do with all this, and why in Zarkon's name does Jemb wants to stop this from happening. The first question can, no doubt, be answered very easily by everyone familiar with the situation as well as Jemb is. Since the author is not immortal, yet, he have no clue as to why this is happening and will gladly take Jemb's word for it. The second question is relevant to the first and therefore will remain mysterious as well. The third question can only be answered after the two first questions were answered. As for the last question, The author must admit that breakfast is, no doubt, a good enough reason to save a system from being destroyed, even if the system in question is the Solar System. The airlock opened again and in came two tall, well built ladies each holding a small briefcase. Louise was black with a nice ass and large tits while Yeli was a more slender blond with great legs. "I've taken the liberty to ask in my two assistants..." Jemb started. Ford and Zaphod stood perplexed not being able to take their look from the two busty ladies that stood there in minimal dress. Jemb introduced everybody to everybody and ordered the computer to set a course to the System HUI on the far side of the Galaxy. There, he thought, they can begin their search. Ford was having other things on his mind at the moment, namely, Louise, Yeli and how to get them into bed with him. Zaphod was thinking the same thing. Surprisingly enough, Trillian was thinking the same thing too. Arthur was busy trying to understand why they are going to the other side of the Galaxy when the problem seemed to be connected to the Solar System. However, since the only person in the room that knew the answer to the question was busy opening the cases his two assistants, Louise and Yeli, brought him, Arthur gave up and went to sleep. Random was trying to ask Jemb what was the whole story with a book but he gave her a quick "Do Not Disturb" look and turned his back on her. She decided that if they don't want her to help then she won't and left for her room. "I'll show you to your room" Trillian broke the silence gesturing Louise and Yeli to follow her. The three of them left the bridge leaving Zaphod and Ford with their mouths open as they looked at the firm butts of the two ladies move as they walked. "You'll have to share one," Trillian said as they walked pass the dim corridor, "we don't have enough space." The two girls smiled. They were feeling dizzy from the effects of the Oxygen to which they were not accustomed. As Trillian opened the door to their room Yeli almost collapsed. "Honey," Trillian went over and helped her, "Are you O.K.?" "We'll be fine," Louise replied for her companion, "it's just that you breath so much Oxygen, how can you live like that?" She sat on the bed. Trillian helped Yeli to the bed and sat down between the two girls. "Yes," she said, "I forget that you're not human." She put her hand on Louise's shoulder and started massaging it. "That's nice" Louise murmured and put her hand on Trillian's thigh. Trillian was feeling naughty, she started thinking how it would feel like to eat this girl's pussy. The thought itself made her shiver and she put her hand on Yeli's thigh. Louise took that as a positive reply and started moving her hand slowly up Trillian's leg, pushing her dress upwards as she did so. Trillian grinned and started to move her hand on Yeli's leg in the same fashion. She put her other hand on Louise's leg and started rubbing it up and down on her bare thigh, almost feeling her getting wet under the tight shorts she was wearing. Yeli liked to have Trillian's hand caressing her leg and she quickly leaned back and grabbed Trillian's tits from behind massaging them through the light cloth of her dress and bra. Trillian liked that, she moved her right hand up under Yeli's skirt and started moving it slowly over her smooth underwear gently pressing it against her crouch. Her other hand was already deep between Louise's legs pressed against her short tights under which she was obviously wearing nothing. Louise started moaning as she grabbed Trillian panties under her dress and started pulling them up, thus squeezing them against Trillian's wet cunt. Yeli lifted Trillian's ass up and in a second she pulled her dress over her head. She slowly pushed Trillian on the bed and started sucking her nipples, first through her white bra and then pulling her bra down so she could feel Trillian's real breasts. Trillian started moaning in rhythm with Yeli's licking as she struggled to remove Louise's shirt. She could feel Louise getting wet under her shorts and it was not long before the black goddess was stark naked on the bed, one hand trying to remove Trillian's panties while the other was massaging Yeli's firm pale tits. Yeli continued to suck and lick Trillian's tits as she removed her panties from under her skirt throwing them on Trillian's face. The smell of Yeli's cunt made Trillian lick her lips with anticipation. She wanted so much to taste a cunt right now. She moved her hand down Yeli's belly until she reached her soft, wet mound and started slowly rubbing Yeli's clit. Yeli started moaning but kept sucking and licking Trillian's nipples. Louise, however, was now busy kissing Trillian's belly-button on her way to her cunt. She got lower and lower until one of her tits slipped right in between Trillian's legs. The feeling of the warm boob on her clean shaven cunt sent Trillian into a frenzy as she started tightening her legs around Louise's tit. Louise also felt Trillian's reaction to her tit landing on her cunt and she grabbed it with one hand and slowly rubbed her nipple on Trillian's wet cunt. Trillian decided that she needs more and pulled Yeli up until her cunt was right over her mouth, she began by letting her fingers move slowly over Yeli's clit rubbing it up and down and continued by letting two fingers slip into her pale pink cunt. Louise was by that time already licking Trillian's wet pussy, one hand grabbing Trillian's tit as the other was rubbing her own wet nipple. Yeli took her shirt off, letting her pale firm breasts dangle as she stood on all four, her cunt over Trillian's head. Trillian started fingering Yeli's asshole as she was sucking and licking on her moist cunt. This sent Yeli into newer heights of ecstasy and she came screaming, pressing her pussy harder into Trillian's face until she could barely breath. Louise now got up and laid besides Trillian. Trillian started kissing her big black tits. The taste of the nipple that was not long ago pressed against her own cunt made Trillian crazy. She was about to move down and start eating Louise's cunt when she felt Yeli rubbing her hands on her cunt. As she looked down she saw Yeli sitting on the foot of the bed, one hand fingering her cunt while the other was fingering Louise's. Trillian kept sucking on Louise's tits when an idea hit her. She got up from the bed and put on a short dressing gown. "I'll be right back" she said and left the room in a hurry. She came back a few seconds later only to find the girls stuck in a 69 position eating each other's pussy furiously. She sat on the bed and watched as Yeli was licking Louise's cunt, spreading its lips apart to expose the dark pink that laid hidden under those black lips. Trillian took out of her robe's pocked what seemed to be a pearl neckless. She started rubbing her hand over Louise's cunt and then over her asshole, lubricating it, while Yeli kept eating the black girl's cunt. Trillian slowly started inserting the pearls into Louise's asshole. With each new pearl inserted into her ass Louise moaned harder and harder. As Trillian finished inserting the entire neckless up Louise's butt, leaving outside only one pearl, she moved Yeli's mouth from Louise's cunt and turned her on her back. Louise was now on her back, spreading her black cunt wide open as she was moaning and fingering herself. Trillian gestured Yeli to come besides her. She pushed Louise's hands aside and shoved two fingers in the warm soft hole. She grabbed one one of Louise's tits and started fucking Louise with her fingers. It was not long before Louise started comming. Trillian motioned Yeli to make her move as she continued fingering Louise's cunt. Yeli grabbed the the neckless and slowly started pulling it out of Louise's ass. Pearl after pearl. Very Slowly. And with each pearl that came out her ass Louise was coming harder and harder. A pearl, an orgasm. Every pearl coming out Louise was screaming harder, begging Trillian to fuck her faster, begging Yeli not to stop. When the entire neckless was out Louise could not take it anymore and fainted on the bed from exhaustion. Now Trillian wanted some for herself, she pulled her vibrator from her robe and let the robe slip off her tense body. She gave the vibrator to Yeli and lay on her belly on the bed. Lifting her ass up Yeli started licking her shaved cunt from behind until she felt it was wet enough. Then, in one hard blow, she pushed the big dildo deep into Trillian's acing cunt. Trillian gasped but regained her senses in a minute and started moving her ass up and down on the dildo as Yeli was licking her ass hole and the back of the pussy. Trillian moved herself faster grabbing her clit between her forefinger and thumb and squeezing it harder until she felt she was ready to come. She continued riding her fake cock while pressing her clit harder between her fingers. Yeli felt that Trillian was about to come and she quickly stuck a finger up her asshole. Trillian came and as Yeli continue to stick her finger deeper into her asshole and her dildo deeper into her cunt, Trillian kept coming for quite some time, trembling and quivering until she, too, collapsed on the bed powerless, the dildo still in her cunt. A Soft hum wrapped the ship as it glide though the empty space. The hum stopped. A strange noise was heard. Someone entered the vessal, she went to the computer and pressed a few buttons. A strange noise was heard. A Soft hum wrapped the ship as it glide though the empty space. *** Chapter IX: Stranger Things Have Happened (MF, con, oral, cum, sf, humor) The Heart of Gold Stopped. A beep woke Arthur from his sleep. He got dressed and left him room, heading for the bridge. On his way he met Jemb. They walled together. They arrived at the bridge. They sent a signal to wake up the rest of the crew. They were orbiting a blue and green planet that looked amazingly similar to Earth. It was in fact Earth. A communication light blinked and Arthur went over and pressed a button. Trillian appeared on the Monitor. "Trill.." Arthur started as the woman on the monitor cut him off. "I'm not Trillian, I'm Trishia MacMillan" "Trishia, what...? Where are we?" Arthur said, realizing they where not where they were supposed to be. "I 'fixed' your ship so..." "Hey baby" Zaphod said to the woman on the monitor as he entered the room together with Trillian. A second later he realized that he was not talking to Trillian but to Trishia MacMillan and shut up. "Trishia, what's going on here?" Arthur started and looking at Jemb's amazement explained "Jemb, meet Trishia MacMillan, Trillian's alter-ego from the alternate Earth." Jemb stilled looked puzzled. Arthur continued "We," he moved his hand around the room pointing at everybody (including Ford and Random that just entered the room), "are from an alternate dimension and Trillian is really Trishia MacMillan from our universe... It's a long story... You see, my Earth was destroyed by the Vo..." "Arthur, no time for that now," Trishia MacMillan interrupted, "you might not notice but we are, and so are you, slowly disappearing from existence. You see, since there is one copy of the Guide left from your universe a large dimensional slide is moving this Earth back to your universe and since there is no Earth in your... well, you get the deal... Now we have to get the Guide and destroy it." "But we don't have it here" Jemb replied. "Can't we go to a party or something?" Ford suggested and received an agreeing node from Zaphod. "You meen the Hitch Hiker's Guide ?" Random interrupted Ford looking at Trishia and Trillian. "Yes, dear" They both answered simultaneously. "Then I have it mom," Random looked ashamed at Trillian and Trishia MacMillan "I picked it up in that planet that was blasted." "What?" Arthur shouted. "What?" Jemb shouted. "What?" Trillian and Trishia MacMillan shouted. "Who cares?" Zaphod shouted. "Yeah?" Ford shouted. "Yes" Random said silently and left for her room. In a minute she was back carrying the black box with the words "Don't Panic" written on it. Jemb grabbed the book from her hand and flipped it through the air. He pulled out a small gun and in a second evaporated the thing. Random started crying and ran to her room. The monitor went blank. The ship blinked for a nanosecond and then continued orbiting the planed as if nothing happened. The planet below blinked for a nanosecond and then continued orbiting the sun as if nothing happened. The Universe itself blinked for a nanosecond and then continued orbiting Bill Gates as if nothing happened. Actually, something did happen in that nanosecond. A fortunate chain of events which the author have no intention of explaining sent Marvin several thousands light-years away to a small planet occupied by a race of humanoid females were he is to spend the rest of his unnatural life as a fuck-machine and were he discovered the Ultimate Question to which the answer is 42. Random was still crying in her room when Ford knocked on her door. "Are you O.K.?" he asked through the closed door. "No" She replied. Ford opened the door and walked in. He sat by her on the bed and started rubbing her shoulders, trying to calm her down. She continued sobbing and laid her head on his lap. Ford continued rubbing her shoulders, feeling his cock getting harder and harder. Random felt it too. She felt it getting harder and longer as it was pressed to her cheek. "Wow," she thought to herself, "It's sure is big." She slowly calmed down as she started pressing her mouth on the large hump that appeared under Ford's pants. Ford felt Random's mouth on his cock and started sliding his hand very slowly under her shirt. Random moved a little and started rubbing Ford's balls through his pants. She liked what she felt and slowly undid his fly. After a short struggle she managed to get Ford's cock out into full view. She started sliding a finger up and down his long dong, admiring it's length and thickness. By now Ford had his hand inside Random's shirt and he started massaging her tits in slow, long movements. Random was now kissing the side of his dick with her hand opening his pants' button to allow more room. She paused for a second as she undressed him and laid him on the bed. Random was now sitting on the bed, her back to Ford's face, and her hands gently rubbing his prick and balls. She continued rubbing his cock until Ford started inhaling and exhaling heavily. Then, in one fast move, she slipped the large cock deep into her mouth. She could barely get it all in but she started sucking it, moving her head up and down as her hand grabbed the base of the cock and pulled it down, exposing it's entire length. She kept on sucking he cock, almost choking whenever she pushed it too deep into her mouth. She liked sucking it. It made her hot. Ford was lying on the bed quivering with pleasure from the deep-throat Random was giving him. He pushed his pelvis harder against her face until he felt he was about to come. Just at that moment Random pulled away and sat on the bed, looking at his cock a small drop of pre-cum appeared on it's tip. She smeared the drop on her finger and started licking it, looking at Ford as she did so. Ford went mad. In a second he was undressing Random and in a second he laid her on her back and glide his cock into her wet pussy. He started humping and pumping. Random felt the big cock deep inside her wet cunt and went nuts. She started moaning and screaming with pleasure as each centimeter of his cock gliding in and out of her got her closer to orgasm. Ford was about to come. He pulled out of her thinking he could hold on alittle longer. Random, on the other hand, wanted him to come. She wanted to feel his wet, sticky jizz splashed on her face and tits. She sad down on started masturbating him, his cock almost touching her face. It a second a warm, wet shot of cum hit Random's face, some of it getting into her mouth. She pointed his cock downwards and the second splash hit right between her tits. The third and last splash hit her left boob. Random started smearing Ford's cum on her tits and face, rubbing the wet tip of his cock on her right nipple while she was licking the white stuff from her lips and fingers. Ford pulled back and decided that he have to repay her at least alittle. He laid himself on the bad and started eating her pussy skillfully. Pushing aside the red hair he spread her cunt lips and started licking her hole and clit. Slowly Random started moaning, rubbing his cum on her tits with one hand and pressing his head deeper between her legs. Ford now was eating her harder, sucking her clit into his mouth and fingering her hole faster and faster until, with a long low moan Random came, quizzing her tits together while trying in vain to lick the cum off of them. On the bridge Trillian was fighting with Zaphod about were to go next. She wanted to get something to eat. Zaphod, on the other hand, was thinking more in the direction of sex, drugs, and rock'nroll. Trillian gave up and left to her room while Zaphod tried to explain to Jemb and his two lovely assistants why they should not go back home but join them to the party he was taking them to. "But where is it?" Yeli asked. "Who cares?" Zaphod replied, "It a party." The truth was that, at the time, Zaphod had no idea where to go in order to find a good party. "Computer," he said, "take us to the nearest party, O.K.?" It did. -- +--------------' Story submission `-+-' Moderator contact `------------+ | story-submit@qz.little-neck.ny.us | story-admin@qz.little-neck.ny.us | | Archive site +--------------------+------------------+ Newsgroup FAQ | \ .../assm/faq.html> /