Message-ID: <4523eli$9710021151@qz.little-neck.ny.us> X-Archived-At: From: Celeste801@aol.com Subject: {ASS} Celestial Reviews 221 - Oct 1 Newsgroups: alt.sex.stories.d,alt.sex.stories.moderated,alt.sex.stories Followup-To: alt.sex.stories.d Path: qz!not-for-mail Organization: The Committee To Thwart Spam Approved: X-Moderator-Contact: Eli the Bearded X-Story-Submission: X-Original-Message-ID: <971001141425_-1731785467@emout02.mail.aol.com> X-Is-Review: yes Celestial Reviews 221 - October 1, 1997 Note: There has been renewed discussion on a.s.s.d. regarding why some guest reviewers don't use their "real" names. I have great respect for ALL my reviewers. One may occasionally go berserk and give someone all zeroes when he deserved a 6, 4, 1; but other than that, the guest reviews have been pretty good, and they have helped me a lot. They even enable ME to skip some weak stories and read the good ones that these reviewers suggest. I respect the opinions of people who want the reviewers to give their names, but if I personally were a story writer I would NOT want to use the same name to review and to post - OK, so I HAVE done that, but what's one exception? It was really (and unnecessarily) hard for me to post "Virtuous Reality," because I felt that people would hold me to higher standards because I had critiqued other stories. Not everyone will react that way, but lots of people do. The important point here is summarized by the old saying, "Don't throw out the orgasm with the bathwater." If you skip a review by, say, Piper, Fiddler, or Stubby (to name just a few) you may be missing a damned good review. Second Note: One misty Scottish morning a man was driving through the hills to Inverness. Suddenly out of the mist, a huge red-haired highlander steps into the middle of the road. The man is about six foot three and built like a walking wardrobe. He has a huge red beard and despite the wind, mist and near-freezing temperatures, is wearing only his kilt and a tweed shirt. At the roadside there also stands a young woman. She is absolutely beautiful - slim, shapely, fair complexion, heart-stopping. The driver's attention is dragged from the girl, as the highlander rips open his car door and drags him from the seat onto the road. "Yew!" he shouts; "I want yew to masturbate!" "B-b-but, I ..." stammers the driver. "Now!" thunders the man. The driver, fearing for his life, complies. "Right, do it again!" demands the highlander; so the driver does it again. This goes on for nearly two hours until the driver has cramps in both arms, he has rubbed himself raw, and despite the mist and wind, has collapsed in a sweating, gibbering heap, unable to lift himself from the ground. "Do it again!" demands the highlander. "I just can't any more," whimpers the man, "you'll just have to kill me!" The highlander looks down at the pathetic heap slumped on the roadside and says, "Aie right laddie -- NOW, could yew please be so kind as to gi'me daughter a lift to Inverness!" Final note: Remember: even though someone else may be posting my reviews for me, my e-mail address is still Celeste801@aol.com. - Celeste "Workout" by Wadsworth (fucking) 6, 5, 5 "My Nipples Explode With Delight" by The Bear (transgender) 10, 8, 8 "All This for Only 79 Cents?" by The Bear (chaotic blowjob) 10, 10, 10 "Look What I Did When My Boyfriend Left for the Weekend" by The Bear (humor) 10, 8, 8 "The Reluctant Bride" by Mike Hunt (pre-nuptial agreements) 10, 10, 10 "For Fuehrer and Fatherland" by Unknown Author (cruel & violent sex) 9, 8, 5 Guest Reviews: "Digger" by Emerson Laken-Palmer () "A Footsie Game" by Unknown Author (near-public foot job) 10, 10, 10 "Delivering the Evening News" by Jim Fix (emerging adolescence) 9, 9, 8 "Way of Life" by Caesar (dominance & submission) 9.5, 8, 6 "Xena: Warrior Princess" by Steve1044 (superhero sex) 9, 7, 7 "Libido" by Emerson Laken-Palmer (stud redeems naive wife) 9.5, 9.5, 9 "Batgirl: The Untold Origin" by Unknown Author (superhero sex) 8, 8, 7 "Aunt Carol" by Christopher Allan Peters (family hedonism) 8, 6, 8 Reposted Reviews: * "Angeles City" by Jim Fix (overseas military sex & romance) 9, 10, 10 * "Bonnie" by Friar Dave (romantic hedonism) 10, 10, 10 * "Celeste" by Dirty Dawg (romance) 10, 10, 10 "Workout " by Wadsworth (wadsworth5@aol.com). This author has posted several other stories that are much better than this one. It purports to have been written by a 15-year-old girl, and that part is believable. In this story two people just fuck with bad proofreading and all in a single paragraph. The people have no personalities; they just screw away like animals and call it "love." This story actually contains sexy thoughts. A useful exercise would be to rewrite the story so that they show through. Or maybe to forget about it and write some more good stories. Ratings for "Workout" Athena (technical quality): 6 Venus (plot & character): 5 Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 5 "My Nipples Explode With Delight" by The Bear (thebear@io.com). The narrator has been sucked into undergoing an experimental procedure that will change his gender. They promised him that it was easily reversible and totally painless. They also promised that no one outside the experimental team would ever know and that he would receive $2000 for about a week's work. Finally, Debra, one of the lab assistants, promised him the best blowjob of his life as soon as the experiment was over and his "equipment" was back to normal. Hence the insidiously clever pun in the first sentence of this review. Things go wrong, and the poor guy has to receive his blowjob prematurely, and his nipples do what the title says right about the time his cock does the same. I'm not certain this is a TG story at all, since the experiment didn't really work, and the hero got nothing but some expensive surgery to repair his exploded nipples. Ratings for "My Nipples Explode With Delight" Athena (technical quality): 10 Venus (plot & character): 8 Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 8 "All This for Only 79 Cents?" by The Bear (thebear@io.com). Like the preceding story, this one is an entry in Malinov's spam title contest. The idea seems to be to find a spam line in a.s.s. and then to write a story to go with that title. This is the best entry I've seen so far. A married man sneaks into a sex shoppe to buy a cheap magazine. Finding there is no such thing, he purchases a postcard for 79 cents (including tax); but then the only other customer in the store has a seizure or something. While the rescue workers are coming for that poor wretch, the woman from upstairs comes down to give that man the blowjob for which he has paid. Since nobody knows any better, Our Hero accepts the blowjob and goes home. Hence the title. This is a very creative little story. Ratings for "All This for Only 79 Cents?" Athena (technical quality): 10 Venus (plot & character): 10 Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 10 "Look What I Did When My Boyfriend Left for the Weekend" by The Bear (thebear@io.com). This is another entry in Malinov's spam title contest. The boyfriend drives away for the weekend, and the babe with the 38DD's and the sexy lingerie is on her own. What will she do? Will she fuck herself senseless with blackmaled nympho queens? Will she douse the raging fire within her bicurious cunt with buckets of cum? Well, no; but what she does is interesting in its own way. Ratings for "Look What I Did Athena (technical quality): 10 Venus (plot & character): 8 Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 8 "The Reluctant Bride" by Mike Hunt (MrM1ke@aol.com). As I read this story, I suspected a forgery. The bride's dress was stylish: "The bodice was quite low cut, but a wide needlepoint bobbinet covered the swell of her breasts which would have been otherwise on display." Sylish bodice... needlepoint bobbinet... Mike Hunt my ass! But while demonstrating that the dress is convertible, the bride to be of Mike's friend Brian sheds her inhibitions and her clothing - and at this point I agreed that this was indeed the Real McCoy. This story is not all that hard to summarize. Remember how on those old "Dragnet" shows Sergeant Friday and his partner would engage in a dialogue that was essentially a verbatim chapter from an anti-crime textbook? Well, this is Mike's chapter on "The Sanctity of Marriage: Or What Goes Around Cums Around." Actually, that would have been a much better title: "The Reluctant Bride" sucks - literally. Anyway, Mike is a member of the wedding party; and as the hour of the wedding approaches, he humps the bride. Repeatedly. And all in the name of the sanctity of marriage. Ratings for "The Reluctant Bride" Athena (technical quality): 10 Venus (plot & character): 10 Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 10 "For Fuehrer and Fatherland" by Unknown Author (Reposted by who@why.not). I initially looked at this story because it sounded like it might be part of Uther Pendragon's Brennan family series. Yeah, right! The story focuses on the life and hard times of a simple French girl who is captured by the Nazis and used for their amusement during World War II. If I didn't know better, I would suspect that this author just wanted to have an excuse to talk about cruel and perverse sexual activities. Imagine that. Ratings for "For Fuehrer and Fatherland" Athena (technical quality): 9 Venus (plot & character): 8 Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 5 "Digger" by Emerson Laken-Palmer (Reposted by who@why.not). A teenager vacations with his family and a friend on the shore of Lake Erie. He takes a friend as a companion and their adventures provide the framework for the story. Like many post-pubescent boys, the main character has a monomania: losing his virginity. He feels this is an opportunity to accomplish his goal, and his far more accomplished friend will help in his quest. They meet a group of Canadian teenagers, and the story takes off from there. The author is a good storyteller and overall I liked "Digger". I could fault the grammar, but grammar should never get in the way when telling a story. What did detract from the story was the writer's references to booze. Bombay Gin drank straight from the bottle? Almost instant recovery from a drunken stupor? Not in my experience. What the characters were doing - not the brand of booze - was important. When the action is down to the final stages of undressing who cares about the pedigree of the gin; it is sufficient to say, "She took a swig from a bottle of gin." and get on with the point of the story. The ending is worth the time spent reading this story. The few faults are more than offset by the ending, which I found both true to life and very entertaining. Ratings for "Digger" Athena (technical quality): 8 Venus (plot & character): 9 Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 9 "A Footsie Game" by Unknown Author (reposted by who@why.not). {If anyone recognizes the author of this story, I would certainly like to know who it is - Celeste.} Whenever I see a story reposted with no author given, I wonder immediately how that happened. A few stories are originally posted that way, of course, by authors who don't want even pseudonymous fame, or direct reader feedback. But more often, I think, the author information gets lost in the long chains of reposting that happen to all stories in our genre (and especially to the good ones). That's better, I suppose, than someone changing the authorship to themselves! Still, if you post someone else's story, do make sure you leave all author and contact information on it. (This is not to imply that who@why.not is the one who snipped the authorship in this case; I have no doubt it happened sometime earlier on.) Anyway! This is a fun short-short in which the narrator and his probable future sister-in-law have a hot and nicely-described tryst under the table at an engagement dinner, surrounded by family members who have no idea what's going on. This is a kind of "footsie" that I had never imagined! The footsie games that I have described, or been privileged to take part in, have involved just feet and shins and calves, perhaps a knee or a thigh. They are sexy because they're hidden, because all contact is sexy, and because, in general, they suggest that more private and full-body contact is to follow later on. They do not result directly in orgasms! But this narrator and the lovely woman across the table from him are more imaginative, and more flexible, than that, and this footsie game involves not only feet and legs and thighs, but also a moist and receptive pussy, and a hot and rigid cock. Two very convincing (if, strictly speaking, anatomically unlikely?) orgasms ensue, and they are all the sexier because they follow a long erotic buildup, and because the two must keep their climaxes reasonably well concealed, to avoid inconvenient questions from their tablemates. I'd probably give this story something like an 8 for perfectly fine writing, an 8 for plausible characters, and a 10 for appeal. But I'm an indifferent grader! There's something very sexy about innocent but forbidden sex, sex between friends, sex almost in public, the footsie under the table, the quiet hand-job in the airline seat, the kiss of lips against labia under the conference table, in the darkness of her neat wool business skirt, her thighs squeezing your cheeks as she tries not to gasp, the taste of clandestine juices... Excuse me, I have to go now! Ratings for A Footsie Game" {Added by Celeste} Athena (technical quality): 10 Venus (plot & character): 10 Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 10 "Delivering the Evening News" by Jim Fix (jimfix@home.net). Guest review by DG. This is a very nice, very sweet story about a relationship between a thirteen year old boy and a woman in her twenties. The narrator meets the woman while doing his paper route, and finds out she is lonely widow. They start talking regularly as he drops off the paper every afternoon, and things progress from there. In my last guest review I complained that the description of how a situation progressed from a conversation between total strangers to wild sex was very unrealistic and unbelievable. In this story, the opposite is true: the writer takes his time and really makes us believe in what is happening as the woman seduces the boy and introduces him to the pleasures of sex. I think it would have been even more believable if the boy had been a little older, say sixteen, but that doesn't really distract from the story. This story also deals very realistically and candidly with the problems a couple like this would face, such as keeping the boy's parents from being suspicious. The narrator and his older girlfriend find a creative way to spend large amounts of time together, and their relationship continues to grow. Eventually I found that I wasn't willing to suspend my belief any longer. I don't think a relationship like this would ever last - there is too much growing up and maturing that has to happen on the part of the younger person. At some point there has to be a parting of the ways. So the ending of this story, although touching and romantic, doesn't ring true to me. A completely separate issue deals with the morality of an older woman sleeping with a thirteen year old boy. This has been dealt with extensively by Celeste and other reviewers, and my two cents worth is that in real life it is an extremely bad idea. That doesn't mean that I don't want to read stories about it, however, because for me a story is just a story and anything goes. For some people that isn't true, and I could very well see a story like this bothering someone deeply, because the situation is described very realistically and yet nothing negative happens. The writing in this story is workmanlike, and the sex is realistic but not particularly hot. The real strength of this story is the very realistic description of the beginning of the affair between the young narrator and the older woman. Ratings for "Delivering the Evening News" Athena (technical quality): 9 Venus (plot & character): 9 DG (appeal to reviewer): 8 "Way of Life" by Caesar (reposted by who@why.not). Guest review by Anne747. Okay. We all have our opinion on the reposting issue. This story is has been posted by someone other than the author. There is a copyright notice, no mention of whether the author objects to reposting or not. If putting a copyright notice on a piece you really should make it clear what usage you allow. Especially in this case, where the person posting has not removed it (pat on the back to them). I'm guessing that they wouldn't have posted it if it said - no posting without permission. Anyway, on to the review. The story kind of reminds me of a fairy tale. Masterful Dom moves into the neighborhood and convinces the local ladies that they really are all submissive. The lesson or moral of the story seems to be that women cannot be truly happy unless they are submissive. Utter crap! Now, the other problem I have is a line used very early on in the story - "You will do as Dirk says or I will hurt you or your family." Let's forget the force issue for a moment. I really think this line is laziness on the part of the author. Just think how much more difficult it would be to write a story where the Dom seduces the woman into submission. Showing her what he thinks she is missing. Threats get rid of the need to develop the plot more. It's not a particularly violent story, but I think it could have been better slowly drawing the first woman in, not just using the threat of violence to convince her. Of course, all three women just love being submissive sex slaves/sluts, didn't you just see that coming? It's really too bad, since the writing is fairly good, and most of the sex scenes fairly hot. A couple of times I lost track of who was who, but I find that common is stories with more than a few characters. I'm not sure that 20,000 words is long enough to do a story with 8 people justice. I think actually, with a little slower build-up, a little more believability this could be a rather decent D/s novel. Hey, if you're into the genre, you will probably enjoy it Ratings for "Way of Life" Athena (technical quality): 9.5 (minor problems, but found with my spellcheck) Venus (plot & character): 8 (characters submit too quickly) Anne747 (appeal to reviewer): 6 (not my cup of tea) "Xena: Warrior Princess" by Steve1044 (steve1044@aol.com). Guest review by Piper. This story caught my eye as I was scanning through the spammage. "Oh," I though to myself. "A nice little Xena/Gabrielle/whomever bit". Since I've seen the show several times, I know what the characters are like, and what they look like. A good thing, too, since this story is a little short on descriptives. In fact, aside from the first few paragraphs, there isn't much description of the scenery, the heroes, or much else other than what the people do to themselves and each other. Damn! Here I was, expecting a nice, Xena/Gabrielle story. What do I get? Four cardboard cutouts superficially acting like the characters on the screen might, if they were cast in a b-rated sex romp. First, Hercules gets in on the act (he finds the two women, in the middle of nowhere, off in a hidden spot, just after dawn). Then, when the three of them arrive at Xena's sister's house (where Xena and Gabby were going), they all almost immediately head off to bed. Needless to say, any early character development fell flat. So did my expectations that the protagonists would act in ways that their screen counterparts would not find too unusual. Ah, well, at least the sex is well-written. As a mindless wanna-fuck, it's not too bad. But, if you're looking for your favorite femme fatales in a story that even faintly resembles something you might see on T.V., you'll be disappointed. Ratings for "Xena" Technical merit 9 Plot & character 7 Appeal to reviewer 7 "Libido" by Emerson Laken-Palmer (reposted by who@why.not). Guest review by Piper. When I first started reading this story, I was duly uninspired. In sex stories, I've learned to shudder any time one starts out with a line stating "..this is a true confession..". Mental alarms went off. Almost immediately - in the second paragraph, in fact - some bad English reinforced my preconceived notion that any "true" story is almost guaranteed to "suck the big one" (in the bad sense, not the a.s.s. sense). Well, imagine my surprise, when a quarter of the way through the story I found myself enjoying it. After that rocky start, Emerson cleaned up his act and came through with something truly enjoyable. So, I quit looking for the flaws and started reading for the fun of it. Isn't that what these stories are for, after all? The narrator, Les, is married to Lisa, and has a brother named Larry. Lisa was completely lacking in any knowledge about sex when she and Les got married (she was a complete virgin), and didn't even find out what an orgasm was until after they had been married for a year. (Do women like this really still exist in this day and age? Even ten years ago? They do? Wow!) Anyway, after years of wedded bliss, and a declining sex life, Les is starting to get a little desperate. After all, a once-a-week servicing of his dead-fish wife wasn't anything to brag about (or think fondly of, either). He comes up with a plan - dinner, dancing, and then a trip to Libido's. Libido's is a sex bar. People (mostly men) go there to pay vast sums of money for watered-down drinks, to ogle the waitresses wearing their frilly bikinis, and to stare at the live sex show the bar puts on every night. Lisa has heard of this place, and says no, no way, not ever, never, nope, not a hope in hell, not even with wild horses. "Sigh", thinks Les. Well, Larry, (remember him?) gets told all about Les and Lisa's situation over a few drinks in a bar. Les is in a mood, and his brother's bragging about his own recent conquests haven't helped him in the least. You see, when the gods of fertility doled out their genetic inheritances, Les got the inner goodies (steadfastness, gentleness, caring, feelings, etc.), while Larry got the outer goodies (tall, muscular, coordinated, looks-to-die-for, a big cock, etc.). Larry knows women, and has known many women (in every sense of the word). He knows exactly what Lisa needs. I guess it's inevitable. Whenever there's a repressed housewife, there's a big stud able to, in one night, turn her fading libido into a beacon of horniness. Emerson came up with a good story while still following through to the inevitable conclusion. After all, we know what's going to happen. It's just a question of how, where, when, and what happens afterwards. Emerson does a good job of covering all the bases, and of giving us some hot sex to go along with it. All in all, I'd say this is one of the better stories of its type. Ratings for "Libido" Technical merit 9.5 Plot & character 9.5 Appeal to reviewer 9 "Batgirl: The Untold Origin" by Unknown Author (reposted by who@why.not). Guest review by Tooshoes. The well-known story of Batgirl's origin is as follows: Barbara Gordon was the daughter of a police commissioner. She both followed in her father's footsteps and rebelled against his authority when she chose to fight crime as the vigilante Batgirl. The Untold Origin revises her motives. In this story, a teenaged Barbara is kidnapped by the evil Mind Bender. He rapes and sexually tortures her until her will is broken. Then Batman rescues Barbara while her sexual excitement is at a peak and inadvertently the Dark Knight causes Barbara to experience her very first orgasm. This moment has a powerful, lasting psychological effect on the innocent girl. She can't get Batman out of her mind. She cries out his name whenever she orgasms. She pierces her genitals with his symbol. Ultimately she will become Batgirl, hoping to attract Batman's attention. I had a very mixed reaction to this story. I did not like the descriptions of sexual torture, or that Barbara was just barely a teenager at the time. It was too graphic and aimed for cheap thrills; yet some discussion of the topic was essential to show the development of Batgirl's fetish. I could not accept the idea that rape and torture could lead to the sexual curiosity and fun that Batgirl eventually enjoys in the story; but otherwise, she is an interesting and believable character. I was glad to see Batgirl have some wholly pleasant, consensual sex before the story was over. Technically, it was well executed, with just a few minor errors, a good amount of literary flair, and a fairly logical plot. "Aunt Carol" by Christopher Allan Peters. Guest review by BillyG. The first thing you have to know about "Aunt Carol" is that it's a long story. A very long story. Depending on how you measure story length, know that it's 345K bytes, almost 62,000 words or 6500 lines long. Now there's nothing inherently wrong with a long story, but it does require certain organizational skills. It's easy to get lost once you leave the story and then return, for while there are apparent breaks in the story, they're not identified by chapter name or even chapter number. Clearly, such a ponderous tale needs the organizational help of named chapters, both in helping to return to the story as well as keeping track of the players. I don't know about the reading styles of others, but I like a story that has a beginning, a middle and an ending, usually filled out with sufficient eroticism that it constitutes one good bite, comfortably consumed in an evening, perhaps before eyeing my significant other's charms. "Aunt Carol" has a beginning and an end, but separated by such distance that'd it'd be easy to forget. Too, there are more players than an NBA game and while there are a couple of "stars," the lesser characters tend to get lost and worse, to confuse the story. To enjoy the wide diversity of kink in this story, one has to possess a hypertrophied sense of credulity; it requires that you embrace the unlikely not a few times, but almost constantly. Smut stories often have an element of magical thinking; frequently we must stretch our belief just a bit to accept an unlikely character or plot line. "Aunt Carol" requires that we accept the statistical unlikelyhood of every character having a similar sexual appetite and moral standard. The more I'm asked to believe the unbelievable, the more it pulls me away from the potential erotic impact of the plot line. To that extent, it loses power as an arousing story. For all its length, the story's simple. Imagine a family, no two families, that have strong and secret roots in the porn industry, one with a son and the other with a daughter who, as you might expect, are in love with each other as well as in lust. The boy, Chris, is spending some time with Aunt Carol, his mom's younger sister and the most attractive character in the story. She seduces him, of course, and in a moderately erotic fashion. His uncle, a bit player, is in on the game just to keep things tidy and above board. Aunt Carol arranges to have Chris's girl friend, Alicia, spend some time with them. As it turns out, this improbable visit is made possible by a connection that just happens to exist between Aunt Carol and Alicia's mom from the old days. >From this point on, the plot line becomes more convoluted and increasingly unlikely, at least in the limited experience of this reviewer. Through a long sojourn in the porn industry, Chris is slowly led back to the womb as it were. Guess who's been in the background all the while, silently engineering much of the adventures? Yep. Good old mom! This story has some juicy moments of voyeurism and exhibitionism. Were there no one else in the story, I'd get the hots for Aunt Carol. She's delightfully sexy and outrageous and a hedonist of the first order. I soon began to resent the parade of other players. Too much distraction. There's a broad selection of kink in this story. It ranges from incest, younger-older, girl-girl, a touch of water sports, and sextoys to multiple participants in the porn film industry. If it weren't so long, it might be a fun, light read. The entire middle and end of the story as well as two-thirds of the players could easily be extirpated and it would leave the early chapters as a stronger erotic story. But I may be missing the intent all together. Perhaps "Aunt Carol" is the entire plot of a year-long soap on a soon-to-be-introduced smut channel. Ratings for "Aunt Carol" Technical merit 8 Plot & character 6 Appeal to reviewer 8* (based on the first part of the story only) * "Angeles City" by Jim Fix (jimfix@earthlink.net). Do soldiers on leave really play games like this? Three men sit at a table and drink their beers. The first to smile has to pay the bill. That seems easy enough, but there is one catch: there will be three girls under the table giving them a blow job while they drink their beer, and if no one smiles the first to get his rocks off will have to foot the bill. This story contains numerous clever military references and anecdotes based on GI tales of the type that begin with "This ain't no shit. . . . " At first it seemed that this was going to be a simple tale of military debauchery, but then it turned solidly romantic. This was a very good story. Ratings for "Angeles City" Athena (technical quality): 9 Venus (plot & character): 10 Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 10 * "Bonnie" by Friar Dave (Friar_Dave@mhbbs.com). Bonnie is being reposted part-by-part. Here's a repost of my review. Dan has company for the weekend: his older but not-too-close cousin Mark, Mark's sexy sister-in-law Kate, their three nubile and buxom teenage daughters, and Kate's younger sister, the eponymous Bonnie. Well, on Day One of the visit, Mark reveals to Dan that Kate is insatiable, and he says that he'd like Dan to help out a bit in the bedroom. Dan, of course, declines. Then Dan tells Kate that the 15-year-old daughter has been making a play for him, and she promises to handle the situation. Meanwhile, 11-year-old Penny keeps asking innocent but precocious questions. All this before our eponymous heroine has even arrived on the scene! The action heats up after Bonnie's arrival. As the narrator says, "Broing!" {I'm working on a Word for the Day program. As you may have guessed, the Word for Today is "Legs." Spread the word!} One could regard this story as a treatise on ways to deflate an aroused cock - some using cold water and some using more interesting methods. One could also regard this story as an example of semi-responsible hedonism. I wonder if anyone has ever used that term before. I like Friar Dave. I really do. But as I started reading this story, I couldn't help saying to myself, "Aha! I've got him. This story is too disjointed to earn straight 10's." But alas! He managed to pull it off. That's the breaks, I guess. This is a really sexy story. Ratings for "Bonnie" Athena (technical quality): 10 Venus (plot & character): 10 Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 10 * "Celeste" by Dirty Dawg (reposted by Bookman Archives). From its title I assumed this would be a story about a naked naughty nympho teenage cheerleader having midair sex with her skydiving coach before landing in a cucumber patch and doing the wild thing with the horny St. Bernard dog that was accompanying the two nuns who were fucking the brains out of the altar boys behind the barn. I was wrong. This story is one of the best treatments of human emotions that I have read in a long time. I literally both laughed out loud and wept while I read this story. Then I just felt like cuddling up with my husband, who was watching Rambo or some godawful thing on TV. At first I was upset that this story was titled "Celeste," but now I feel honored. Ratings for "Celeste" Athena (technical quality): 10 Venus (plot & character): 10 Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 10 -- +--------------' Story submission `-+-' Moderator contact `------------+ | story-submit@qz.little-neck.ny.us | story-admin@qz.little-neck.ny.us | | Archive site +--------------------+------------------+ Newsgroup FAQ | \ .../assm/faq.html> /