Message-ID: <4246eli$9709191654@qz.little-neck.ny.us> X-Archived-At: From: The Bear References: <5vqed3$gm$1@sparky.wolfe.net> <3421C63A.731A@mindless.com> Subject: Re: {ASSD} My Nipples Explode With Delight!!! Newsgroups: alt.sex.stories.d,alt.sex.stories.moderated,alt.sex.stories Followup-To: alt.sex.stories.d Mime-Version: 1.0 Content-Transfer-Encoding: 7bit Content-Type: text/plain; charset=us-ascii X-Complaints-To: usenet@io.com X-Trace: nntp-3.io.com 874677131 2434 (None) 192.55.114.74 Path: qz!not-for-mail Organization: The Committee To Thwart Spam Approved: X-Moderator-Contact: Eli the Bearded X-Story-Submission: X-Original-Message-ID: <3421FAA3.2842@io.com> Malinov wrote: > Story Contest - Just for Fun > or > If They're Going to Annoy Us, They Might As Well Inspire Us > > Write a story and post it to ASS or ASSM, 1000 words or less, which has > its title stolen from a real piece of SPAM. OK, here is a short one: "Look What I Did When My Boyfriend Left for the Weekend" (authentic spam title from posting dated 9/14/97) Laurie wiped her eyes and continued waving slowly, even as her boyfriend Tommy's car disappeared over the hill. She wiped her eyes again, then blew her nose on the sleeve of her sweatshirt, silently damning the hay fever that always hit her at this time of year. She turned toward the house and started up the walk, thinking as she went that maybe it would be a good idea to try some of that Sudafed Plus to see if it would help her allergies without putting her to sleep. Because sleep was the last thing on her mind for this weekend, with Tommy gone! Laurie had a big assignment due in History, an in-depth biographical analysis of Peter the Great - she'd need to spend hours on the Web, plus maybe some time looking at actual books from the library - and then she'd have to sit down and actually type the damned thing! It was due on Monday morning, and she knew that sleep was just not in the cards for this weekend. Sighing a deep and heartfelt sigh (which had the incidental effect of raising and then lowering her massive 38DD tits although there was no one else around to observe and Laurie didn't happen to be looking down at the moment, so really no one benefitted from the visual effects of that great sigh), Laurie went into the house and started looking for Mountain Dew, Surge, Jolt, even coffee - she knew that this would really be an "all-nighter"! ********** Finally it was Sunday afternoon. Laurie's eyes were tired and bloodshot (and still weepy, since the Sudafed Plus wasn't really helping much with the allergies), she had had a total of four hours of sleep over the whole weekend, and her stomach was churning from all of the Doritos, tacos, Hershey's Kisses, and similar brain-foods that she had consumed to fuel her lust for knowledge, but the paper was FINISHED. Laurie stretched a great bone-cracking stretch, arms outreached over her head as she arched her back to its limit, and AGAIN no one was around to observe the truly marvelous way her tits stuck out when she did that. Then she heard the car in the driveway. At last Tommy was back to give her what she really needed! She ran outside, straight to the car door and reached in through the open window to grasp what lay fully exposed in his lap - the Sunday newspaper. She pulled the paper out and sat down on the grass, digging through the mass of dead-and-processed-trees for what she truly craved - colored comics. Only after she had gorged her fact-numbed mind on the insane exploits of Jaguar the Cat, King Fooy, and The Adventures of Terry Stark, Girl Detective, was she able to relax and lie back on the lawn. Then she noticed Tommy was waiting for her, and she allowed him to help her to her feet. "The paper is finished," she told him. "Only you can help me now - will you try to get that %$^%$# printer-drive to work so I can get the damned thing down on hard-copy and stop worrying about a drive-crash? Please? You know, I am getting really sick of having to go through tthis printer-driver shit every time I need to print something out - can't you just get something that works? And another thing ..." She followed him into the house, up to the study/office they shared. "... as soon as you get that son-of-a-bitch printed out, I really need a good fuck!" ***************** Hey Malinov, how was that one? The Bear http://www.io.com/~thebear/bearden.htm -- +--------------' Story submission `-+-' Moderator contact `------------+ | story-submit@qz.little-neck.ny.us | story-admin@qz.little-neck.ny.us | | Archive site +--------------------+------------------+ Newsgroup FAQ | \ .../assm/faq.html> /