Newsgroups: alt.sex.stories.moderated,alt.sex.stories Followup-To: alt.sex.stories.d Organization: The Committee To Thwart Spam Approved: X-Moderator-Contact: Eli the Bearded X-Story-Submission: From: Celeste801@aol.com Subject: Repost: Celestial Reviews 159 - February 19, 1997 X-Is-Review: yes Celestial Reviews 159 - February 19, 1997 Note: I tried to post this through AOL, and they put it on the Newsgroup INCORRECTLY three - count 'em - THREE times - not one of them correct. Eli (of alt.sex.stories.moderated) has been kind enough to offer to repost it for me, and so I'll simply send this to him and ask him to repost it. I regret the delays this causes. It seems that AOL is so hung up on fixing its overload problem that the organization is ignoring this other problem. Please continue sending correspondence to me at celeste801@aol.com. Second Note: Thanks to the help of a correspondent, I have rebuilt my database of stories and should be able to resume my regular review pattern. Third Note: I reviewed several "leftover seasonal stories" this week - specifically Christmas and Velentine's stories. Final Note: Remember that the authors of these stories may like to hear a word or two from you. - Celeste "Radhika and Matthew" by Mary Anne Mohanraj (cross-cultural romance) 10, 9, 9 "Dialogue" by Mary Anne Mohanraj (hot flirtation) 10, 9, 9 "Teen Breeder" by ucclear (beating & impregnation) 7, 5, 3 "Christmas Tale" by Frank Ashby (hedonistic reunion) 9, 10, 10 "Stuck by Cupid" by Hotdog (fun-filled rape) 6, 5, 4 "Christmas Carol" by Mark E. Dassad (teen gangbang) 5, 9, 8 "Take 2" by Gregarious (blind date) 8, 9, 9 "Skinny Dipping with My Maiden Aunt" by Day Dreamer (emerging adolescence) 9, 9.5, 9.5 "Robin" by Mark Aster (moral dilemma) 10, 10, 10 "Robin and Kestrel" by Robin Man (bb superhero sex) 9, 9, 9 "The Little Elf, A Fairy Tale" by Milford Whittemore (fairy tale without sex) 9, 5, 5 "Change of Pace" by Mike Allegretto and Caitlin B. (sci fi TG) 8, 10, 10 "Radhika and Matthew" by Mary Anne Mohanraj (mohanraj@mills.edu). This is a brief but well-written story about an intercultural romance. It contains no vivid sex scenes, and I suppose the main reason for including it in this newsgroup is because it is written by an author who has written so many vivid sex scenes. This is the sort of story after which I had to stop and think about what really happened. As I neared the end, I said to myself, "This isn't really making sense." When I read the last line, I said, "This makes NO sense." Then I glanced back through the story and said, "Oh, yeah! I get it. Now it makes perfect sense." Ratings for "Radhika and Matthew" Athena (technical quality): 10 Venus (plot & character): 9 Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 9 "Dialogue" by Mary Anne Mohanraj (mohanraj@mills.edu). No actual sex takes place in this very short story. The man and woman just make plans, but they are very hot plans. Ratings for "Dialogue" Athena (technical quality): 10 Venus (plot & character): 9 Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 9 "Teen Breeder" by ucclear (ucclear@inetworld.net). The girl thinks her mom is wonderful but her father is a jerk. When the daughter walks past the bedroom, she sees the father cruelly beating her mother with a belt, and this gives the girl her first orgasm. The old man's job is threatened, and Mom figures he can hang onto it by letting the new boss fuck their daughter. Since the boss wants to have children by as many women as possible, the mother arranges for the daughter to take fertility drugs. They date and have sex. Before the second date Dad beats the girl and then goes out with the guys; then Mom serves the boss a good meal; and then Mom stands by the parental bed and occasionally beats the daughter while the boss has sex with the kid during her most fertile period. Knowing how fertile she is, the girl can't help but have a major orgasm. After the boss leaves, Mom beats the girl some more, so that she'll have some more orgasms to "soak it up" and make sure the kid gets pregnant. I guess there are some sexy parts to this story. Mostly, however, it's pretty silly. I really don't think there are many normal girls who would respond this way to this kind of abuse, and there's no sensible explanation for her abnormality. Ratings for "Teen Breeder" Athena (technical quality): 7 Venus (plot & character): 5 Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 3 "Christmas Tale" by Frank Ashby. Frank and Gladys are hedonists. I know this because instead of going to church on Sunday, they stay at home and fuck; and before the third enfuckment they discuss swinging, and Gladys gets so turned on that she's eager to take it up the ass. By this I don't mean they are irreligious: the church people probably preferred that they stay at home, since they would have been distracted by all that fucking, especially the anal part, and especially if the sermon was boring or the choir was off key. Anyway, Frank and Gladys sponsor a sort of secular version of the Waltons' Homecoming or Gathering or whatever their Christmas special was called. The participants in the reunion are fairly normal people whose value systems and lifestyles differ somewhat from my own. I would say that they are like folks next door, but the folks next door to me go to church every Sunday, and I think they shudder at the very notion of anal sex. The story is big on incest, but it's not the exploitive type of incest that many readers find to be distasteful. The story is told by the participants themselves, as they remember it. There are four different parts, each told from a different perspective; and the details of their stories do not always agree. This is an interesting approach: the same incident can be remembered differently by different people, because nobody sees the whole picture. Each person sees only that part of the scene that could have been seen from his or her perspective, and even that part may be remembered imperfectly because of emotions or subsequent activities. The only minor weakness in the story is that it would have benefited from a good proofreading before going to press. Ratings for "Christmas Tale" Athena (technical quality): 9 Venus (plot & character): 10 Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 10 "Stuck by Cupid" by Hotdog (hotdog@who.knows). I thought this was going to be a Valentine's Day story, but it's not. It's a story about a horny guy who rapes a younger girl in the shower. It's not really rape, of course, because the girl enjoys it and decides to go steady with the rapist. The story has additional basic problems with verisimilitude. For example, the narrator claims to attend a public high school that has 22,000 students, with 4000 graduating seniors. There ain't no such place. Most states have only one or two UNIVERSITIES with that many students. To feed that many students, the cafeteria alone would have to be larger than any high school I have visited or heard of. The following criticism may appear trivial, but it's not. In the first paragraph, the narrator says, "I graduate in two weeks and have never been laid." This is not true. He should have said. "I WAS GOING TO graduate in two weeks and HAD never yet been laid." It makes a difference. It's important to use verb tenses in such a way as to help the reader understand the perspective from which the story must be read. Ratings for "Stuck by Cupid" Athena (technical quality): 6 Venus (plot & character): 5 Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 4 "Christmas Carol" by Mark E. Dassad (Ole.Joe@poboxes.com). The narrator is a unintelligent embodiment of high school swine who decides to take an unattractive seventh-grader to a Christmas booze and drugs party so that he can pop her cherry. It turns out that he shares her with a bunch of other guys he hardly knows. The girl doesn't exactly enjoy it, but the guy sure feels good about his contribution to society. If it weren't for the overall illiteracy of this story, it would possibly be a very good story. I don't think many of us would actually recommend gang-rape like this in real life, but the story is a vivid and realistic portrayal of a really shallow lifestyle. If it were clearly written, the story could give us an insight into the mind of a bizarre pervert - like many of those whom we might find in the real world today. It's very difficult to write dialogue in such a way as to make the characters look illiterate without letting the story itself degenerate into benighted stupidity, and this author is not completely successful in his endeavor. Nevertheless, I can't help suspecting that this might be a good story, if it were cleaned up. Ratings for "Christmas Carol" Athena (technical quality): 5 Venus (plot & character): 9 Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 8 "Take 2" by Gregarious (gregtorr@ican.net). Keith gets set up on a blind date with Elena. The date turns out to be wonderful, and so they head straight to her apartment from the jazz club and decide to make love. They have a major focus on doing things for the "first time" together. It was a good, sexy first date. Ratings for "Take 2" Athena (technical quality): 8 Venus (plot & character): 9 Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 9 "Skinny Dipping with My Maiden Aunt" by Day Dreamer. Because of his mother's job, the 15-year-old narrator of this story has to stay with Aunt Sue on Grandpa's farm just outside town. The main difficulty is that they have only two bedrooms, and so he has to sleep with Aunt Sue in her big double bed. Talk about a transparent plot! Actually the situation not all that difficult: Aunt Sue is beautiful and the narrator has a deep and abiding interest in losing his virginity as soon as possible. In spite of sharing the bed with his aunt, Donny is initially virtuous, settling for simple wet dreams in which his imaginary partners look a lot like his bed-mate. When they go swimming, they initially wear their underwear, but it's hard to hide a hard-on in a skimpy bathing suit, and Sue's panties, do not remain opaque when they get wet. As I said, talk about a transparent plot! Well, opacity having been eliminated, Sue decides that it will be OK to go skinny dipping if Donny would like to go swimming again. Boy, would he! And remember, we mustn't tell Mom. And, of course, there's a rule: "Everyone can look all they want, but no handling the merchandise." I guess if the U.S. Constitution can be amended and if the Berlin Wall can come down, we should not be surprised that the Rules of Skinny Dipping can change; and they do. It gets to be pretty hot stuff. The New Rule is that touching and its concomitants should take place only in the pool at the creek, certainly not in bed, where they sleep and have mutual wet dreams together. Eventually the New Rule gets modified with a simple codicil that says it will be OK for them to mutually take each other's virginity. And maybe it would be OK to do it in bed if they were really quiet and didn't wake Grandpa, who seems to be pretty much deaf and senile anyway. As the song says, "Life gets complicated when you get past fourteen...." This is a very good story. Ratings for "Skinny Dipping with My Maiden Aunt" Athena (technical quality): 9 Venus (plot & character): 9.5 Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 9.5 "Robin" by Mark Aster (MyFrThAl@aol.com). Robin first appeared with the Allen Sisters in this author's "At the Pool". In this episode Robin is still working as a lifeguard, and she becomes romantically involved with another lifeguard named Jerry. What we have here is a sexy build-up to a moral dilemma. Ratings for "Robin" Athena (technical quality): 10 Venus (plot & character): 10 Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 10 "Robin and Kestrel" by Robin Man. {This was listed as ROBIN4.TXT}. The two 16-year-old proteges of Batman work out together and get turned on by the physical contact. Later Batman himself frolics with the guys - all sans costume, of course. I enjoy ff sex much more than the mm variety, but it's easy to see that an mm fan would enjoy this, if a deep plot were not considered to be a necessity. Ratings for "Robin and Kestrel" Athena (technical quality): 9 Venus (plot & character): 9 Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 9 "The Little Elf, A Fairy Tale" by Milford Whittemore (MilfordW@worcester.net). This well-written fairy tale about an elf and a naked princess who usually wore a chastity belt but one day went for a walk naked in the forest has no moral and no real point. It's one of the best pointless sex stories that's not worth reading that I have ever read. Ratings for "The Little Elf, A Fairy Tale" Athena (technical quality): 9 Venus (plot & character): 5 Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 5 "Change of Pace" by Mike Allegretto and Caitlin B. (caitlinb@concentric.net). Jack is a bit of a rationalist: he doesn't believe in magick. But his mother is a white witch, which means that she can cast benevolent and humorous spells, like Samantha used to do on "Bewitched." So she changes Jack into a person who looks just like Agent Scully from the "X-Files." Actually, the transformation process continues in several steps in 15 minute intervals until he becomes totally female, but Mom doesn't tell him exactly what these steps are. In addition, there are several other rules that are explained in the story. Since the change will be temporary (unless he requests that it be permanent), Jack decides to play along, to enjoy it, and to make mental notes that he can enjoy later. After all, he has lusted after the Scully character for a long time, and soon he will be encapsulated inside her body! There are several additional interesting twists and turns in this story. Chapters 1-3 were written some time ago by Mike Allegretto, and Chapters 4-6 were drafted by Caitlin B., and finished by Caitlin B. after feedback from Mike Allegretto. The two halves don't match up perfectly (the pace of the second half is different from that of the first, and the first three chapters develop at a more leisurely pace than the last three), and some proofreading would have been in order; but it's still a pretty good collaboration. Ratings for "Change of Pace" Athena (technical quality): 8 Venus (plot & character): 10 Celeste (appeal to reviewer): 10 -- Story Submission: Newsgroup FAQ: Archive site: (Not pretty yet)